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So when it comes to random lobby co-op you'll never really know if the other players are bad or just trying a different strategy that you're unfamiliar with... and with use of dangerous stratagems specifically, if you're playing with friends knowing what's coming might be second nature, but with randoms they might just play the same way they normally do and are confused when people die to them tossing a random eagle cluster bomb or whatever.
Most people don't use voice in online games for some reason these days... and when it comes to Helldivers 2, everyone is basically co-operating only by necessity because the game has no player count scaling, so it's built-in that if you inconvenience the party in any way, you're suddenly a burden, so no one really wants to get yelled at or bullied for putting themselves out there in a lobby where, you never know the other people and you don't know what kind of reaction you're gonna get, and you might even get kicked for saying the wrong thing, so it's better and easier just to pretend you know exactly what you're doing at all times.
Splitting up and handling objectives solo is indeed done with some regularity. Those I drop with usually group up for key objectives that take time to cover, and split up to tackle smaller side items. Does it always go smoothly? No it doesn't, but even the best plans rarely do. We also do it if we're on Suicide+ and completed our primaries and haven't yet located the Super samples.
You sound like you prefer to play cautiously. That's fair, and nothing wrong with it. Don't belittle those who like to be aggressive though.
Went in an outpost through the back door, shot a few bots and got fragged by the lvl 18, one of the others rein'd me went back got my stuff. lvl 18 ran past my stuff died in center of base, i grab my stuff and samples, move on to dealing with hulks/striders clear several more outposts from a distance using AC bounce off vents of factories. I grab two of the 8 ammo boxes in a POI, and the lvl 18 executes me, accusing me of stealing his AC and backpack, he SEEN me take it, despite other than him fragging me earlier, i hadn't picked up any weapons other than my own.
He decided to loot my AC/backpack and my marksmen rifle because i also "stole" his liberator penetrater, despite me not having it. Chances are host took his AC/backpack since everyone kept dying and i had to keep calling them back in. He ended up dying again, i rein'd him and called my AC back in. It landed as he landed and as i took it, he executed me again, because i "used" his AC call in and took his stuff AGAIN!
Dude really thought people can use your loadouts without your permission and that you can only have "one" weapon of every type called in per mission. I never add anyone to my block list in games, but they earned that spot on the list.
I went from people stealing my weapons/complaining about completing all the objectives/mortars
to pure teamwork.
Just finished D8 with a bunch of lvl20s: Good luck doing that with crossplay on.