Creepypasta Theory (REAL!! NOT FAKE)

[GIRL]

The statues in the Memorial Hall were actually real Dwarves who all brought Malt Rockbearers to the Memorial Hall. They drank them there and grew large, but the effect never wore off and they died in there. Management simply coated their bodies in gold and turned them into the statues you see now.

My dad works for Ghost Ship Games and told me this is true, so you have to believe it!

[Addison1024]

So that's what happened to karl

[GIRL]

Publicado originalmente por Addison1024:

So that's what happened to karl

In the description for Skull Crusher, it says it is partly responsible for what happened to Karl. This is because Karl mixed Rockbearer with Skullcrusher, causing the unforeseen effect that it would become permanent. Karl became extra big, and he is the Scout in the center podium.

Management did not want us Dwarves to know that Karl died in such an anticlimactic way, and so they fed us the story that he died in a glorious battle in the caves...

...Now that I have said this, I don't have much time. Management will be after me. They're sending their corporate soldiers to silence me. Take this knowledge and run!

[Erin the Angry]

Nah. Karl leapt from the space rig and carved his way into hoxxes with his pickaxe instead of a drop pod. That's why it's cracked open like that.

[Paintbrush]

my how the the turntables have turned

[ReaperLord]

Then why does no one EVER complain about the smell in the memorial hall? Rotting corpses smell nearly as bad as skunk spray.

I know that Management is various types of terrible, but I doubt they would do something that morbid. Knowing what sort of cheapskates Management are, they probably loaded up the corpses of any dwarves who died on the Space Rig into a Drop Pod and then either launched that Drop Pod into the local star or into a quiet part of Hoxxes.

As far as convincing conspiracy theories go, I give this thread a 3/10.

[Erin the Angry]

They also aren't gold when you are green. Nor are all the other statues erected yet. Maybe they are just made out of the remains of the dwarfs pulled out of those salvage missions we keep being sent to. Those lost packs came from somewhere.

[【🐲】Kobayashi Tohru ★]

They stole them from Dwarka!!!!

[Vandal Savant]

So this is why the permanent brew bug got fixed.

Mein Gott.

[WhiteLezard]

No realistic eyes bleeding realistic blood
0/10 copypasta

[Jack]

Have you guys ever wondered about some of the various unexplained oddities in this game? Like how you never see any humans or other living things in the Space Rig aside from the dwarves? Or why there are dwarves, fantasy creatures, in an otherwise sci-fi setting? I believe the dwarves are a genetic experiment commissioned by DRG to create the perfect workhorse empoyee. However, this came at a cost: the dwarves were too aggressive, attacking most things on sight. To counter this, they installed the Abyss Bar as a means to pacify the dwarves with alcohol, and mandated that dwarves cannot leave the Space Rig unless it is for mining purposes.

[JeanneOskoure]

Publicado originalmente por WhiteLezard:

No realistic eyes bleeding realistic blood
0/10 copypasta

And when I died in game, blood started leaking through the screen. Now I'm dead.
The end.

[iiTzHentai]

Our independent fact checkers found this to be : TRUE.

#FACTCHECKED

[Ackranome]

So furious does have children.

[RaindropperinG]

Publicado originalmente por lowercase_v:

No, the Memorial Hall statues are in fact weeping angels but they never move, even when unsighted by you, because the Mission Control is always watching all and everywhere...

Also the beer is made of dwarves

I honestly enjoy that first one. Mission Control is basically Scp 131 constantly guarding Scp 173 for the safety of the dwarves x)

Mission Control confirmed as the unsung hero of DRG

[Heron]

They poured Molly a Rockbearer? Must've been one hell of a night.