Increase Relationship with a Lady that hates you...

[maxhanon]

So, as the title says, I ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up a little. I intended to marry the daughter of my mate Clais, but after making some not so wise decisions our relationship is -2. She doesn´t invite me, I can´t recite poems, I can´t even send her gifts thorugh the diplomacy mod. Is there any way to fix this other than cheating?

[Sanguine]

Try winning a tournament and dedicating it to her at the feast, usually gets you a point or two in relations depending on her disposition.

[lionhart]

If you can get Clais to give you permission to see his daughter, you can visit her in her chambers and read her poems even if she doesn't like you. Eventually, if you read her the right poems, your relation with her will turn positive and she will start inviting you to visit again.

The only other way I know of to increase relation with a lady (apart from winnning tournaments as suggested before) is to break her relatives out of prison. Keep an eye on Clais; if he gets captured and held in a dungeon, try to break him out. It should give you +1 relation with his daughter.

Edit: Breaking Clais out of prison is also a great way to make him like you enough to let you see her.

[boiling pie]

Clais is an idiot. You don't want him as father-in-law.

[maxhanon]

Well, that are good ideas, especially the breaking out of prison number...

...problem is, I can´t read poems cause -2 relationship...can I hold a tournament myself? I am already independent, Clais was my first vasal (so I don´t really want to see him in prison :D). What do I have to do to hold a fest and tournament?

[Tuidjy]

Originally posted by maxhanon:

What do I have to do to hold a fest and tournament?

Catch 22 - you need a wife.

Give a vassal of yours a city, and hope he throws a tournament. In some mods, you can also win a tournament anywhere, then ride like a madman back, and with her father permission see her and dedicate the win to her.

Next time, do not ruin your relationship, and do not become a king before getting married. There are ways to pull it off, but it is tricky.

[lionhart]

Originally posted by maxhanon:

...problem is, I can´t read poems cause -2 relationship

Not true. You cannot read her a poem if you see her in court, but if Clais gives you permission to visit her, you can go see her privately using the "Visit Lady" option in the castle menu, and there you should have the option to read her a poem, regardless of the -2 relationship. (I know for a fact this works because I once used the exact same tactic to salvage a -2 relationship with a lady I wanted to marry.)

Originally posted by maxhanon:

Clais was my first vasal (so I don´t really want to see him in prison :D).

But if you break him out of prison you get a huge relation boost with him. Sometimes I deliberately allow my vassals to be taken prisoner just so I can free them and get the extra relation points. Anything to keep those grumpy bastards happy ... :P