#HEAVYUPDATE - I am Heavy Weapons Guy. And this, is my weapon. She weighs one hundred fifty kilograms and fires custom-tooled cartidges at ten thousand rounds per minute. It costs four hundred thousand dollars to fire this weapon... for twelve seconds.

[Rando the Crit Clown]

Possibly the worst designed class in the game. I don't think you can fix him, but you can improve him maybe.

General

-35% healing received while revving up or revved up.

I'm just gonna quote Marukuso to save time writing (this is also his idea (but he wanted it to be 25% instead of 35% (I want it to be 50% but I'm also doing other stuff in addition to this so I think 35% is fine))).

Originally posted by Marukuso:

Whether it's yours or the enemy's team getting rolled, chances are you are probably going to start seeing a lot of them coming out of the spawn door, and who can blame them, Heavy's existence alone can be considered a strategy. His large healthpool and Damage allows him to mathematically overpower most opponents, completely ignoring other factors such as dodging or kiting[...] you can make anyone who just learned to play the game topscore as Heavy, simply because there is one strategy Heavy can use to deal with pretty much every problem you can face in this game: Health Stacking.

I often like to point out that a good portion of a Heavy's achievements in a game are less about the Heavy himself and more the countless Medics and Dispensers just hosing health into him, as at full overheal (and with consecutive healing from crossbows and mediguns) even a single Heavy can be very demanding to take out, needing more than a powerclass' clip or for a Sniper to just sit there and charge a shot before being able to actually kill him, and because of this, Heavies kind of work as "Medic magnets" which tend to hurt their own team as the Medics start ignoring other players just to keep healing the Heavy[...]

To add to this, throughout the years Valve has been giving Heavy more and more ways to access Damage Resistance, a mechanic that is incredibly stale and uninteractive, especially on a class that doesn't really need it like Heavy, which increases the class' effective healthpool to idiotic amounts.
I find it notable that the developers took this approach of making Heavy more of a tank in a game where excessive damage sponges have proven time and time again to just not work in a fun way, instead of giving Heavy more tools to make use of his large healthpool to use it as a sort of resource, kind of like Soldier does with Rocketjumps.

With this nerf I hope to make a clearer divide beetwen a Heavy's option to defend or commit for an attack, being able to play on the offensive while also being consistenly healed tends to "dumb down" heavy's decision making

Base spinup speed slowed from 0.87s to 1.50s.

Since Heavy is too slow to dodge attacks, and his non-stop hitscan beam isn't really dodgeable, there's not really any depth or strategy to him or the people fighting him. Either you deal a ton of damage to the Heavy before he can deal it to you, or you need to not have line of sight to him. If he had to actually commit to spinning his gun up this would offer more depth to Heavy's gameplay, offer more counterplay against Heavy, and incentivize loadout diversity since shotguns would actually be useful now.

The minigun spins down faster.

This is to go along with the previous two changes, encouraging Heavy to think about when he should or shouldn't be revved more and allowing him to transition out of it a little easier.

Max ammo is 100 instead of 200.

200 is basically infinite ammo, you never run out. 100 is still a ton and you can kill a lot of people without refilling ammo, but it would actually become possible to run out if you were doing something like sniping at people a mile away for an hour.

Primaries

Huo-Long Heatmaker

All current attributes removed.
While spun up, weapon accumulates heat.
While not spun up, weapon dissipates heat.
At a certain heat threshold you gain the current flame ring effect.
At another threshold the flame ring becomes larger, and can not be jumped over.
At another threshold a fireball will be shot along with the bullets (1 second cooldown).
At 100% heat the weapon will overheat, igniting all nearby enemies in a somewhat large area.
Overheating deals 50 self damage and sets yourself on fire.
Overheating forces you to do a 2 second "oof ow owie my hands are burned" animation.
Overheating causes you to be unable to rev until heat reaches 0%.
Overheating causes heat to dissipate much faster than usual.

This would add some depth to Heavy's gameplay, giving him a resource to manage. If he expects to need to shoot a lot he could start by not pre-revving at all to try to conserve the gun, while if he expects shorter confrontations he could keep revving the gun to keep it in a stronger heat threshold. Or maybe, I'm being stupid and making an overly complicated thing for no reason. The current one is so bad that it is a worthy sacrifice to see which it is.

Tomislav

No rev time! Always revved up! No moving slower while you shoot!
Accuracy bonus increased from 20% to 40%.
-75% pellet count.
Firing speed penalty increased from 12% to 20%.

It has really bad damage and is a meme gun because I can't think of anything else that it could do. It needs Silent Killer because it makes no sense for it to have a rev sound, so it needs garbage damage at close range. It can't have good damage at far range, either, though, since a 300 health dude just sniping everyone with no real counterplay would be obnoxious. So it is now the funny "Heavy is moving so fast while he shoots lol!!" gun!

Brass Beast

All current attributes removed.
You can swap weapons while spun up!.
+100% swap speed (0.25s) while spun up.
-50% swap speed (1.0s) while not spun up (including switching back to the weapon).
-20% damage penalty.

Idk it's hard to come up with ideas for this slot since it's so bland.

Natascha

All current attributes removed.
Dealing damage fills up an invisible meter, with your movement speed while revved changing depending on the status of the meter.
At moderate amounts of damage, rev speed is ~140.
At max damage, rev speed is ~170.
At no damage, rev speed is 70.
Invisible meter slowly drains over time.
-30% damage penalty.

Brass Beast's speed is 44, normal rev is 110, and unrevved is 230. This would let Heavy chase people better like the Natascha allows, but in a much less stupid way. Maybe. Idk. Valve should do this rework then we can see whether it was good or bad, and then 13 years later if it was bad they can change it again.

Secondaries

Family Business

All current attributes removed.
Attacks pierce damage resistance effects and bonuses.
+733% damage.
-90% pellet count.
50% less damage rampup.
-25% firing speed.

This gives it a single 50 damage slug instead of 10 6 damage pellets. Shotguns already always fire 1 perfectly accurate pellet in their shot so it would automatically work correctly. Max rampup is 63, considerably lower than stock's 90, but because all of its damage is in one pellet the minimum damage dealt is 26 instead of 3.

Buffalo Steak Sandvich

Removed damage vulnerability.
40% resistance to ranged damage sources while active.
150 healing on consumption.
Removed movement speed buff.
Removed mini-crit effect.

The Fists of Steel but less stupid, maybe.

Melees

Eviction Notice

All current attributes removed.
Gain the DA speed boost when looking at an enemy within 650 units.
On Miss: Hit Yourself
On Hit: Hit Yourself

He's holding the knuckles wrong so it hurts his fingies to use them. It lets him jump up to higher places like the Boston Basher

Gloves of Running Urgently

Health drain is removed
-50 max health on wearer

A passive penalty to max health and no active penalties for holding it would encourage you to use it as much as you can to justify its downside, instead of encouraging you to only use it when the downside wouldn't matter anyways so it basically has no downside. This would also have the side effect of making stock a more enticing option. It should work out well in encouraging loadout diversity and improving the fun of the weapon.

Fists of Steel

Removed!!!

[Rando the Crit Clown]

No wait this EN is also an upgrade to stock because the downside isn't very impactful uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh imagine it has another downside

[่่่่]

mucho texto

[ktulu84]

This unwavering truth is fortified by a wealth of credible evidence, leaving no room for skepticism or dispute

Bravo rando👏👏👏

[Rando the Crit Clown]

Originally posted by ่:

mucho texto

tl;dr: Heavy is now a much better class, more fun to play, more fun to fight against, better balanced, the game is greatly improved. More loadout variety, Rando is a genius, everyone loves Rando.

[rocketgreentea]

I like the Tomislav change. It makes it an actual sidegrade instead of a straight upgrade from stock.

[Zeorginas]

so.. you want to take away his main purpose of being a tank?

[Rando the Crit Clown]

Originally posted by rocketgreentea:

I like the Tomislav change. It makes it an actual sidegrade instead of a straight upgrade from stock.

Ya! And it would look really funny to have him shooting people while walking around really fast

[Rando the Crit Clown]

Originally posted by Zeorginas:

so.. you want to take away his main purpose of being a tank?

How is someone with 450 health not tanky? Lol

[thodicular]

was it a t least fun writing this post

[ein MGE bruder]

Rando why do you waste so much time writing all this?

[Rando the Crit Clown]

Originally posted by thodicular:

was it a t least fun writing this post

I get paid $800 by Valve for every thread I make. $50 per comment.

[Mina]

His slow movement is his main problem, more natural, faster movement could help him.

[Luigi]

Add a reload to the tommislav because I want to see heavy reload that thing

[ƬƬε乂αղƁ]

jesus ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ christ this is awful

[pix]

Originally posted by AerSilver🗲:

Originally posted by runcnimicas!!:

Rando why do you waste so much time writing all this?

he is obviously trolling and wants jester awards.

he tends to do that. hell unless im reading this wrong he wants to UNDO the buff heavy got for base spinup time years ago... to make him better? by making the slow class slower?

i could be wrong tho i skimed through the wall of bait text.
(i cant wait for randy to say im baiting again tho)