If you marry Haley...

[Captain Blud]

You should have the option of beatin down that dude, Alex, or whatever his name is. Cripple him or somethin.

[YetiChow]

Originally posted by Welss:

*Walks into the kitchen*
*Le pick axe wife Le making pancakes*
*She turns to you and says:*
"Honey, can't you tell? I'm pregnant."

"But, darling... I stayed out past 2am every night last year, I've been too passed out to have a baby with you...

Well, that's the last time you're sleeping in the same chest as the other tools"

[Vroomi]

Originally posted by Promise:

Haley wants you for the money. Alex for the babies.

Basically.

[Crai-Crai]

Gave that hoe five gold bars. Implements like gold bars.

[TTV.nevermorcelestial]

This is hilarious !!

[Idyllic Substitute Finds Purpose]

Originally posted by Pyrofish:

Edgy.

[Cougarific]

Or you could be confident in the depth of your affection for each other and accept her friends as your own?

[Violeta]

Originally posted by Cougarific:

Or you could be confident in the depth of your affection for each other and accept her friends as your own?

Nah, She didn't accept you at face value and instead insulted you. And theres not really much deph when she is in the house all day while your back breaking.

Can't think of any sort of sacrifice she makes for you really.

[Solariceblue]

To be exact, he was speaking about marrying this: http://stardewvalleywiki.com/Hoe
well, if the modding will progress in that way, after marriage that hoe's gotta get an upgrade allowing it to till all freaking soil in the area at a time. Not bad.

[Minnlinz]

if you marry haley they should give you the ability to beat the hell out of her and have her scream and have a chance of someone calling in the cops and they arrest your character several time for spousel abuse and gives you the ability to unlock the douche bag arc that makes you fall to a new low were your character stops tending his farm and drinks too much and gets home drunk and beats haley up to the point were she divorses you and keeps the kid and your character chokes in his vomit one of your drunk fits and you have no one to call for help and your character dies and you have to start all over again.

[Captain Blud]

Nah, it's all good now. OP here. At the jellyfish festival or whatever it's called I smacked her over the head with my axe (the blunt side) and dumped her over the side. Then I stuck the axe in the garbage can outside Alex's house. Now I'm playing video games with Abigail so I have a good alibi. When the new patch comes, I'm gonna go marry Haley's sister Emily. And I'm gonna marry her the same damn day I married Haley. Stardew Valley Theft Auto.

[weiss]

if you are like this irl what i readed here .... oh boy ... poor girl/boyfriend.
do you ever seen the YT video of the abusive relationship of mathew santoro? ... thats exactly how you would handle your girl/boyfriend. not allowed to have any friends cause you would think he/she ♥♥♥♥♥ with them arround and betrays you and whatsoever .... idk what you had for a past life and how often peoples cheated on you ... but get over it.

srsly oh my god.
now feel i myself much lighter after i written this ... ~w~
the need to write this increased heavily after your after comment #5 and your respond to rob in comment #7 ... i am dead serious ... if you are like that irl ... goodnight for your girl/boyfriend ...

[Hermes Trismegistus]

I feel sorry for whoever dates you OP.

[Captain Blud]

I am like that in real life. And it's goodnight for her, not for me. She's the one with two pufferfish chained to her ankles and drowning at the bottom of Lonely Rock. See, I play video games the same exact way I act in real life. After playing GTA I hunt down hookers to run over, after playing Just Cause I grapple up mountains and parachute down all to kill chicks who have male friends. Cuz videosgames = life and my post =/= sarcasm/satire.

[Captain Blud]

Christ, you guys take things super seriously don't you? My post was half tongue in cheek.

[Hermes Trismegistus]

Originally posted by Crack a Saurus Meth:

I am like that in real life. And it's goodnight for her, not for me. She's the one with two pufferfish chained to her ankles and drowning at the bottom of Lonely Rock. See, I play video games the same exact way I act in real life. After playing GTA I hunt down hookers to run over, after playing Just Cause I grapple up mountains and parachute down all to kill chicks who have male friends. Cuz videosgames = life and my post =/= sarcasm/satire.

I see a lot of damage control tbh imo fam.