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One PVP server I started on, had randoms come up and drop gear for me
Another server, I had a L78 run up and kill my L3 ever time I respawned
But in general, offical server, you will more likely get KOS
Also some servers will have both types on them, right. People who like to play friendly, people who like to play cruel. It really depends.
I logged into the WildCard DLC SE on the first day and was killed by 2 level-2 hooligans in under 3 mins of spawning.
Some official servers are better than others, but they are hard to find and usually require you get along with the dominant personalities in global chat to some degree.
Look for un-official servers.
its a survival game. if you attack people.. you might die.
if you make friends. you might get stronger.