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Big spiders aren't too frequent in the game, and I think only present in certain areas. There's apparently a lvl 12 dungeon called Spindleclutch that has a lot of spiders. Your friend should steer clear of that place.
There's actually a full list of places that have spider mobs on the ESO Wiki, so you may want to have your friend check that out, so they know what places to avoid. Even if it means skipping some quests.
There are tiny, tiny harmless spiders that you can sometimes see on the ground that you can kill with one hit at any level. I don't know how bad your friend's fear of spiders is, but for me, who has aracnophobia in real life, I can tell you that killing them in a video game is actually very satisfying.
come on i have arachnophobia i only freak out when i see spiders irl tho your friend is gonna be okay