Funny Stellaris Story

[_ALuX_]

-Unbidden spawn.
-Unbidden compleley dismantle AI federation.
-Guardians of the Galaxy activate, allivating the stress of me spending my resources on warships instead of my dyson sphere.
-Oh yey.
-Guardians of the Galaxy join other AI federation.
-Wait they can do that?
-Guardians of the Galaxy get wiped out by Unbidden.
-Oh no.
-See their fleets on THE OPPOSITE END OF THE FACKING GALAXY dealing with a petty war while the Unbidden steamroll their systems.
-Abandon Game after my combined fleets fall.
-Create thread to share story and have a good laugh.

Any hilarious Stellaris stories from you guys?

[Army Pea]

-Federated with 2 other powerful empires
-Two Fallen empires awaken
-War in Heaven activates
-Nearly everyone becomes subjects of the more powerful AE except...
-.... for our lonely federation as we stand strong against both AE
-Combined fleets wreck the larger AE's empire to dust
-Submits to us
-As federation leader i instantly gain 10+ vassals
-Use my new subjects fleets to take care of the other AE while i finish my nexus

10/10 Would dominate again

https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1507969198

Proof

[_ALuX_]

Originally posted by Army Pea:

-Federated with 2 other powerful empires
-Two Fallen empires awaken
-War in Heaven activates
-Nearly everyone becomes subjects of the more powerful AE except...
-.... for our lonely federation as we stand strong against both AE
-Combined fleets wreck the larger AE's empire to dust
-Submits to us
-As federation leader i instantly gain 10+ vassals
-Use my new subjects fleets to take care of the other AE while i finish my nexus

10/10 Would dominate again

https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1507969198

Proof

Talk about someone blowing up your phone.

[BrowneHawk]

Not so much funny but very satisfying. Iron man game. Lost my newly gained northern systems to the Pirate Khans events. They took over my planets and enslaved my people. So I got the planets back and exterminated them. Was my first time dealing with the pirate event so felt good to kill them.

[Xgpmcnp]

I recently had a xenophile fallen empire awaken and make everyone become a signatory.. Including a determined exterminator and another fallen empire. Only 4 empires, including mine, don`t submit to them. I declared war to them, and ultimately win. I now have a determined exterminator and fallen empire as vassals.

[Jagothegamer]

In the earlier days of my current game, there was a Machine Intelligence empire called the Cyban. For a time, we enjoyed good relations with the Cyban, even setting up a research agreement for a 30 year time span with them.

Several years pass, and they ally with the Mith-Fell High Kingdom, and then, having no where left to expand, the Cyban close their borders to me, without warning, and later proceed to declare me their rival. This betrayal, was one they would soon very much regret.

I prepare a large fleet, and proceed to claim all of the Cyban's systems, and then declare war. Their fleets, alonfg with the Mith-Fell High Kingdom's fleets fall before me with little effort, and I easily inavde all of the Cyban's home systems, my ground forces easily being the strongest in the glaxy due to the very strong trait and being a Warrior Culture. We win the war of course, and completly disassemble the Cyban, and now the robot workers we build look exactly like them, as a reminder of our conquest. It was a glorious war.

[Jagothegamer]

My bad, it was the CyDRAN Grid, not the Cyban:

https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1506390121

https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1510118259

[101Titan101]

- Robotic uprising starts in top left area of ring galaxy.
- Am spiritualist and in right area.
- 2 of the 4 major nations (am one of them :D) have alot of robots.
- Plan to attack when robots hurt them.
- Heard about End Game Crisis, am ready for the war to end all wars.
- Robots crushed in like 5 months.

[Jagothegamer]

Originally posted by Whomst'd've Habe Gedacht:

- Robotic uprising starts in top left area of ring galaxy.
- Am spiritualist and in right area.
- 2 of the 4 major nations (am one of them :D) have alot of robots.
- Plan to attack when robots hurt them.
- Heard about End Game Crisis, am ready for the war to end all wars.
- Robots crushed in like 5 months.

Robot Uprising isn't acctually an end game crisis, they're a mid-game crisis I think, if even that.

[Meewec]

back in the early days of synthetic dawn i think it was i ideology warred an empire and created some dispicable neutrals
https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1147691111

[RandomDude]

My funny story is hundreds of hours in Stellaris, wiped the galaxy once, all other playthroughs abandoned in late game when it was only a matter of time before victory.

Never saw a crisis...

Had a FE awaken once? I thought that was the crisis lol...

[Jagothegamer]

Originally posted by RandomDude:

My funny story is hundreds of hours in Stellaris, wiped the galaxy once, all other playthroughs abandoned in late game when it was only a matter of time before victory.

Never saw a crisis...

Had a FE awaken once? I thought that was the crisis lol...

389 hours, and I've never encountered a crisis either because of either game updates or that I simply got frustrated. Farthest I've gotten is full psionics and destroyed a few Star Nations as FP, but I soon got fed up with that game because of the "fleet refuses to attack" bug, where the fleet decides not to engage in combat.

[Nico]

Originally posted by RandomDude:

My funny story is hundreds of hours in Stellaris, wiped the galaxy once, all other playthroughs abandoned in late game when it was only a matter of time before victory.

Never saw a crisis...

Had a FE awaken once? I thought that was the crisis lol...

Since one of the last updates you can lower the end game start date. 50 years after the start of the end game, crisis are possible. Extensive use of jump drives allure the unbidden in your galaxy.

[Xobra]

>Play as "Pacifist Spiritualist Traders" with Life Seeded
>DE spawn next to me
>They got 2 Gaia planets
>Research all the Weapon Techs
>Stockpile a lot of Minerals
>Taunt them with little Fleet, but good Defenses
>They declare War
>jews.jpg
>Their first Fleets loses against my Star Fortress and "emergency Fleet"
>other Empire declares Ware against DE, because DE lost Fleets.
>Rush in with newly build Fleets and Armies
>Mfw "All Your Base Are Belong To Us"
>Have a total of 4 Gaia planets wit around 80 Tiles total
>Become Superpower
>Never spent money on Fleets because most Empires love me anyway
>Great Khan happens
>Submit, because why bother?
>Dismantle Fleet, got even more income
>Other Empires don't want to submit
>Khan conquers and destroys literally half the Galaxy
>Destroys 5 Empires while I do nothing
>Khans sends Fleet to Enigmatic Fortress near my Border
>Destroy everything but the main thing
>Khan gets Assassinated
>10 Years of peace
>Khan splinters to 4 Hegemonist, become free
>They got no Fleets because E. Fortess
>Galaxy consist of me, 3 other Empires who got almsot recked by Khan, and 4 wanna-be Khans
>Time for Galactic Peacekeeping
>Finished Domination Tree
>jewsagain.jpg
>Still no fleets, but Death Citadels
>Taunt everybody into War
>50 Years later, got 6 Vassals, 1 little Khan hat no planets, just Dwellings
>close to 2400 now, actually building a Fleet now.
>FE wakes up, instantly Declare War for "Peacekeeping"
>AE chases after Vassals Fleets, while I just Destroy everything they got
>Some sh*t about Ancient Rival
>AE got recked, time for the next one
>Rinse and Repeat
>10 Years later Unbidden shows up
>Wanna eat the Galaxy
>Instantly regrets to disturb my Peaceful United Galaxy
>Unbidden don't even last 10 Years
>End Of Cycles for ♥♥♥♥ and Giggles
>50 Years later: watch the Galaxy being destroyed because I got bored
>Begin new Game as Devouring Swarm, with goal to become the Scourge
>Actually fight the Scourge later and win
>mfw ...again

[Snugglequine]

My very first game playing a machoine race, not an exterminator just a machine race.
I get cornered into the end of a spiral arm rear the galactice core, FE one side and standard empire other side. No way to expand. So I declare on the standard empire in order to take a few systems and expand through the unclaimed space. I win, gaining control of a few planets, and notice I have a Xenophage opinion debuf (I had to google what that meant). Well we can't have that can we? So I try to force them off with displacement purge. I missclick or something I set it to extermination. I get a genocide opinion debuff, and two massive empires team up and declare war on my little machine empire. I lose.

10/10 would accidental genocide again.

Edit: Also, 450 hours in the game, only gotten to an endgame crisis once. Strength 1x Contingency. Ouch. I usually get bored or lose horribly before an endgame happens.
I've downloaded a mod that adds in the Marvel Comics infinity stones, getting them all makes you super OP. So I'm now in a game trying to get all the stones before a 5x Endgame crisis shows up. I've got 5 so far, still can't find the 6th. It's now 2449 and crisis is due 2600. Wish me luck!