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lot's of guides, here's the first one I found on google
https://www.dexerto.com/gta/gta-online-how-to-get-into-a-solo-public-lobby-1531835/
Not everything is related to cheaters.
Most can't get a open NAT. But you obviously don't understand how that works. Otherwise one would not blame it on the game engine.
Had enough infinite loading screens in solo sessions to know this.
suspend GTA V in the resource manager for 8 seconds, the resume. problem solved
Also the Steam overlay will cause GTA V to never load. It is weird but true. Do not go into your Steam overlay if you are loading into a session or loading during a session such as after a heist. Also keep in mind if you complete a heist it can take an extremely long time to load back in. I have no idea why this is but it has been this way for as long as I can remember.