Hidden camera footage at Hello Kitty's corporate headquarters found:

[Hariman]

This is a transcript of the most important section. This stenographer even recorded actions in italics:


Developer: "Dude, I totally know what she would do make sure the next Hello Kitty game is a hot seller."

Executive: "Well, what is your idea?"

Developer: "We should make "Hello Kitty Island Adventure" and put it on ALL the systems!"

Executive: "Is that not the fake game that one show, I think it was South Pork, made fun of during their World of Warcraft episode?"

Developer: "Yeah man, that's totally why it will sell super fast! It'll become, like, a meme. Memes are free press, and people will buy it just because it was a joke back then!"

Executive: "Are you high, or do you really believe this?"

Developer: Pulls out a giant joint and takes a very, very, very long toke on it. "Oh man, so much "Yes!" to both those questions."

Executive: "I should fire you for your foolishn--"

CEO: "No. The memes are strong in this crazy world. We witnessed this not long ago, when the Doom and Animal Crossing fandoms became friends, all because those games were released on the same day."

Developer: "Thanks so much, Boss! I wasn't sure if you'd go for it or not!"

CEO: "You, however, will be in charge of development. If it fails, we shall punish you with a fate worse than firing: We will make you become sober and stay sober."

Developer: "Duuuuuuude... that harsh." Looks at his joint. "I'm gonna have to switch to the lighter joints so I can work better. This is my idea weed."

Executive: [Sighs, pulls out a hip flask, and drinks a very large shot.]

CEO: [Raises an eyebrow.] Am I the only person in this company not on drugs?

Executive: [Coughs from the whiskey, then sheepishly looks away.] "Maybe."