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Good is very subjective. I would start with servers that have a handful of mods. Less than 5 is a good number (unless they are bundling multiple mods into their own single mod-homebrew). Learning new mods and the gameplay caveats while on the server might be a bit much if you're just learning.
The official servers are a good place to start. Players can be ruthless in PvP and offline raiding. But that's a feature, not a bug. There are plenty of low-key, nice players as well. They are usually the more chatty ones. I'd spend around a week playing and chatting before discussing any teaming up with others. If you're not a jerk and you're consistently online around the same time/days as other people, they'll naturally want to team up.
Once you've made a few friends, I'd then ask them about what mods they like/hate and possibly transition with them to another, non-Keen server.
SE Multiplayer sub forum
https://steamcommunity.com/app/244850/discussions/7/
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Info +
You may join the SE Community on Keen Dsicord to have access to the "Server ads" and "Multiplayer" channels to try the available Servers and find players waiting to play.
All can join the SE community from the Discord permalink added to this pinned :
https://steamcommunity.com/app/244850/discussions/0/4622335767039372629/
Once on the Keen Discord -> Go to the Role selection channel to choose PC role to unlock the proper community -> go to the "Multiplayer" channel to find players waiting to play and go to the "server ads" channel to try existing servers.
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That said, I recommend to become Pro at building a Respawn Station, also know more about the Rich ore spots and Easy Biomes of the game before going MP
The important on Public server :
1 - We must join with about 8 players in our Faction to have enough PCU to build ships and stations on all Planets, Moons and Space.
-> We can build a few ships and one station on one Planet only when going MP to play alone.
2 - We must have at least 3 players, one to collect ores, one to find a Trading Station to sell ore and buy Zone Chips for your Safe Zone, and one to build the Respawn Station.
3 - We must build our Respawn station before leaving the server and going MP alone is not a good move because it will take more time to build it before leaving the server.
May be OK to go MP alone but you must be Pro/Fast at making a Respawn Station and want to build the needed for one Planet only because limited PCU.