Way to trigger wife as lover event?

[unseenclass]

So without cheats is there some way to trigger the event that makes your wife your lover? Or at least better my odds of getting it?

[Klutch]

I try to keep her relations as high as I can.

1) Gifts. If she is greedy even better.
2) Award Titles. Designated Regent/Tutor/Swans whatever you can afford
3) Family Focus (This may directly trigger the event)

It only happens if she likes you, so boosting her opinion of you will make it easier. I don't know how much of this FACT, but these are the steps I follow to make a wife LUV ME.


^Family focus, High opinion would probably be your best bet to trigger lover

[unseenclass]

Yeah I have been married to her for about eight years now and her relationship with me is 100. But still no event. Guess I’ll just be patient.

[al_x_ator2411]

When the gift event triggers (the one about horses or hunting birds) choose the most expensive option.

[tracker947.gv]

I've had the wife gain the "lover" opinion modifier with me with no event triggering after having the family focus for an extended period of time and a high opinion of me. Idk if this is a fringe case because of mods or something, but it happens to me fairly frequently.

[gghadur77]

Originally posted by unseenclass:

So without cheats is there some way to trigger the event that makes your wife your lover? Or at least better my odds of getting it?

Have the family focus.
Don't have a wife who hates your guts.

I think the specifics are that your wife needs to have an opinion of you that is above 40 or 50. If her opinion is below that you will get a temporary opinion modifier worth +15 that stacks and lasts several years, such that getting it can eventually bring her opinion up so that the focus event will make her your lover instead.

Alternatively, use the seduction focus and seduce someone before you marry them.

Lastly, as mentioned, you can pick the expensive option in the gift events to make your wife fall in love with you. Or you can get someone as a lover through any other random event (for instance, carousing or seclusion related ones) and then marry them afterwards.

Originally posted by tracker947.gv:

I've had the wife gain the "lover" opinion modifier with me with no event triggering after having the family focus for an extended period of time and a high opinion of me. Idk if this is a fringe case because of mods or something, but it happens to me fairly frequently.

I have never seen this happen without an event pop-up, but there is a regular event that occurs with the family focus. In my experience using the family focus will reliably cause it to occur if your wife likes you and isn't already your lover. It may or may not take more than the minimum 5 years before you can change focus though, but if your wife is young enough to have kids then you might as well try to have as many as possible in case something bad happens to your heir.

As far as I know, the "though we did not marry for love..." event that makes your spouse your lover is specific to the family focus and requires you to currently have the focus selected in order for it to happen.