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What option do you choose when you try to seduce? Try the lewd option, that one has a very high chance of success when you are seducing someone Lustful.
PS. Brawny and Gregarious do not help with regular seduction, though Gregarious helps if you get a random event to seduce concubines. Weird, I know. High opinion of you helps, though.
Intrigue does not help with seduction (except for not getting caught by jealous spouses). This is also kinda weird, especially since its modifiers and trait increase Intrigue, and it can level Intrigue education.
Have to love the counter intuitive, or just down right misleading, nature of the game sometimes. "Let's crate an intrigue lifestyle focus that relies primarily on another stat to actually work."
If it is very important to you, try resigning from commander or council positions and see if you have better results.
If you keep getting "I can wait" dialogues then either you are picking a target too far away, or you and/or the target are unavailable. Note that leading armies counts as being unavailable.