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I takes will to get into this game but once you get it, its one of a kind.
Its a fine wine, don't gulp it. Savor it.
But this is just one way to do it and there are so many others. You could try to get one of the achievements, such as uniting the British Isles, or something like that. I'm trying to get 100K prestige on this play-through. Right now it is not looking even close but you always start slow. I'm starting to snowball now so we'll see.
Additionally you should shamelessly savescum all you want until you learn the game. Try different tactics and see what works best for you.
The lack of pace especially early where you don't have much land and therefore not many options can make it feel dull at the start too. It is a game though for the long haul eg you are planning for hundreds of years not next month and that can also take some getting used to.
It definately helps if the RPG style elements appeal though verus a more pure grand strategy style game.
Yes, I started with a dynasty that had only 2 living members and almost got wiped out in the first 2 generations by several epidemics. But... I just checked this afternoon and about 200 years and 5 generations or so in... I have 26 living members. 26... from a starting point of 2 (a father and a son). My personal holdings/kingdom is only a small area of Brittany and southern England but in Dynasty view -- My dynasty controls chunks of Germany, France, and I thinik Northern Italy. Not too shabby from a father-son starting point.