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Honestly, at first, I remember being kind of like you. I didn't really get it and left it to rot in some corner of my hard drive. Then the expensions came out, I grew a few years older (yes, I think it did make a difference) and gave it another shot. And... I couldn't understand why I didn't like it at first. Now, I can't help you about the campaign, I haven't played them all and can't really remember anything. As for the main, sandbox game, I can only offer a few pointers.
1) Find what works out for you. Being on random is fun sometimes, but most people have set-ups that they prefer. I know scattered star systems bores me to death. I love tight clusters, common stars, common planets, common habitable, on the biggest map available. I need huge chunks of empty space to make life support modules really important. Also it just simply makes for more interesting wars in my opinion. Also, don't forget that different technology pace makes really different games. I love long, drawn out wars (and games) so Very Slow is my thang (nothing beats the thrill of waiting for that new tech to turn the tide while, in the meantime, your forces are getting mauled hopelessly).
2) What difficulty level were you playing on? I tend to use higher tiers difficulty levels, though not the highests as there are just insanely hard to me. Too easy is boring and exactly as you described. Also, sometimes, no matter what, you might just end up with a boring game... it happens... (Reminds me of Hearts of Iron or Europa Universalis in some way. From time to time you'll end up with a game so weird and/or boring it just makes you rage quit.)
3) Finally, don't trust this game's name. As you've noticed, it is far from being "Civilization, but in space!" I think the mistake I might have done a few years back was to expect some kind of Civilization copypasta with a space setting. Of course they're both 4x and share quite a lot of mechanisms and stuffs. But overall GalCiv offers such a different mood, playstyle and pacing that yes, it is possible I ended up being disapointed because my expectations were wrong. Who knows, maybe it is what happened to you as well. Or maybe you just don't like this game at all, which is fine as well. Sad, but fine. ;)
One thing that popped to me was when you said you choose very slow for game setting. I am almost sure I didn't select that in the sandbox experiment but it is worth checking to see if i missed that. When it comes to the Dread Lords campaign, I don't recall seeing a choice, but that might be worth checking as well.
I am a research first guy, so I set that real high, but I still have enough to fill my slots on the planets and keep up with the upgrades so that doesn't appear to be the problem.
I am mainly concerned about the Dread Lords campaign at this point. I am not sure you have done these but it is what I am working through now. I am about 4 or 5 scenarios in, after the Dread Lords have been "released". It just takes forever to generate enough technology to build a ship that could hang with them. I would like to be able to get a fleet together to get some strength in numbers but as soon as I get one built they come and destroy it without ever having launched it.
I don't expect to be terrific at it, but I would think I should be competetive at normal. I am not afraid of getting beat either, I prefer a challenge to a cakewalk. But when I get destroyed twice in a row on Normal, then drop to Beginner, which is what I am to this game, only to be trounced again and then all the way down to Simple my ego is taking a shot here.
Finally, I can see that maybe my random got me too big of a universe and too friendly of competitors, but I am frustrated by the lack of action in the Dread Lords scenario/campaign. i would have thought being drawn up the way it is there would be more action than waiting for them to come with their super ships that I can't hope to do anything about.
As for the random maps, if you want to be attacked by the ai, drengin and korath are the most warlike. Arceans are also militaristic. If you keep a small military, they are likely to start extorting money from you. They will eventually declare war.
In random maps, you can select Mega Events. These events have very different effects. Three that i find common are annoying though.
The Jagged Knife spawn, they literally steal controll of a number of systems from every faction, as well as all technologies. I think they also manipulate the civilizations to go to war.
The Dreadlords can spawn, this usually happens much later. The dreadlords in these random maps can't create ships anywhere near as fast as in the campain. Usually, the dreadlords spawn mid-late game, where you have a chance at survival. The peacekeepers i've actually seen only once, but they were annoying.
The peacekeepers attack every warship that enters their range. The peacekeepers stats are dependant on the capabilities of every civilization in the game. If everyone is using beam damage, the peacekeepers have massive shielding. If nobody has missile defense, their main weapon is missiles. This becomes a massive pain if they spawn late game, as their numbers are also dependant on the numbers on every other ship.
I've read that the strategy for dealing with the dreadlords is to rush them, because they build slowly, but i think they meant that for the randomed maps. I still find it impossible to deal with Dreadlord ships in the campain because it takes longer to tech up. However when the mega event spawns them i actually have a chance because i actually have weapons. The first time they spawned for me, i created a massive ship that drained about 1/10 of my money to purchase, that single handedly destroyed the first dreadlord ship in my territory.
I've given up with the campains myself, sure i can tear the non dreadlord civs apart, but the dreadlords are unstoppable...
Karagek, thanks for the answer, that was very helpful to learn that I am not alone on the Dread Lords. That just seems incredibly unbalanced. I think I need to try another random map and see if something happens next time, could have just been bad random luck.