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The startup.meta has been working excellent for me both in the past as well as recently the last couple days since I have come back to play. It makes RDO so enjoyable. It's the only way I play.
/Salute
It's nothing but a simple xml config file, you can read and easily identify the function of every line, even if you know basically nothing about code. Nothing at all nefarious here, and nothing R* will ban you for, or we'd have all been gone long ago . . .
If you or someone you know has been playing in RDO Public Sessions, and then all of sudden gets a ban after moving to trying the Private Session method, the ban in question was probably during their time of playing in Public Sessions, since it does usually take Rockstar some time to take action in such situations. So again, someone just now or very recently never played Private Session all of sudden does that via the startup.meta and then sees a ban in-game or on their account, via Rockstar email; etc. It most likely happened at least a week or so ago.
People have been using it for years - the only person who says that got banned for using it is you. there are 3 different versions to it, and everyone who uses it says the same thing - you won't get banned.
If people got banned for using it there would be lots of posts about it - only way to get banned is to play normal lobbies or be a modder/hacker in normal lobbies.
I would inclined to believe you if there was more people with said issue - you obviously did something - that or your little brother reported you to rockstar. It's a 100% controlled environment.
I just want to find out the reason for such a ban, because the reason is not clear to me at the moment
I would do some research there is multiple ways to do the private lobbies - find out the best/easiest one for you - If this is a temporary ban - that means you cannot risk going into normal lobbies. Once your perma banned that's it.
What I would do is reinstall the game - make sure the folder is empty before hand - do all of the research you need for private lobbies - watch video's do whatever it is you need to do to make sure your private lobby is 100% then once your ban is over with - then do it - if you end up in a normal lobby you have the chance at being at the mercy of modders/hackers and could end up perma banned.