Recent reviews by The Guy

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Recommended

16.7 hrs on record (5.5 hrs at review time)

This game is perfect, save for the absolute masters buttocks blasting pounders that are security bots.
First experience went like this.
<Be me, beta-vidya game playa
<Have friends who lowkey bought game by nagging
<Set up ship, name it Autist's Journey
<Plan to get to go further than any other autist before
<Just me and 2 others
<Jump in with no knowledge on anything
<"Whatcangowrong.jpg"
<I chose captain
<friend "spicy boi" picks gunner
<Other friend "Joe's Kneecap" and gets that scientist meta going
<We buy fuel cells and a couple of odds and ends
<Head to a scout and secure mission
<Get to star, immeditely starts to warm up warp
<floating around
<Pick a ship up on sensors
<Some security drones, with W.D in their name
<Think we can just brush past
<I realize they're in range
<We get slightly grazed
<Herewego.jpg
<Everyone takes positions
<We have no idea what we're doing
<Never fired at anything before
<Realize we have to align ship to fire
<We realize that we have been hit
<Our ship is on fire
<Pilot controls give me a slight hemorrhoid from the straining involved
<Scientist runs around repairing things instead of scientisting
<Gunner can't gun since core is going critical
<"screw it"
<Gunner is now running around making systems to cool core down
<Realize we have had on the cooling fluid all along
<Fluid is gone
<Core is cooler but rising faster than a morning wood
<Scientist figures out how to scientist
<Gets shield on fleek with some dank cyber skills
<Have 1 pixel of health
<Realize this might be it
<But wait
<I finally realize we can warp
<I quickly move our ship into postion while praying to allah in 3 distinct tounges
<We somehow survive the pot shots
<We escape
<Lifefindsaway.jpg
<We're in warp
<Finally repair every damaged system
<Set up everything so no more fire or core overloads
<Still in warp
<Skip warp
<Instantly gets destryoed after dropping out of warp
<Mfw
P.S.
Rest in pieces, S.S Austists Journey
Expoloring the reaches of colons never reached before.

Posted August 19, 2016. Last edited August 21, 2016.

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Recommended

203.4 hrs on record (126.2 hrs at review time)

Clap your hands if you're a procrastinator with things to do but instead watch the amount of money go up and up...
Clap your hands!
*Clap* *Clap*

Posted September 2, 2015.

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Showing 1-2 of 2 entries