Oh Jean-Luc Picard, what a disgrace, so straight-laced, it's such a waste. You're such a dud, no fun or wild side, just a boring stud. You won't even have a sip, you're as exciting as a carrot tip. Even your caffeine intake is strictly controlled, you'd make a better daddy for a plant than a human soul.

i met this guy at a bar, and he was the most straight edged guy you could meet, he wasnt drinking, he wasnt smoking, no mushrooms or lsd, he wouldnt even drink coffee, he would make a great parent for any of you single mommies looking for a sugar daddy.

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