August 24th, 2036

Minions Army

The yellow tide is rising, and it's bringing humanity to its knees. Reports are flooding in from across the globe of massive swarms of Minion memes, coalescing into a terrifying, unified force. The benign, banana-loving creatures of yesteryear have become a shrieking, chaotic wave of destruction, and their primary nesting ground has been identified: St. Elsewhere Hospital.

What was once a sanctuary of healing is now a breeding ground for our digital doom. The once-bright hallways are now stained yellow and reek of… well, no one can quite describe it, but the smell is universally recognized as a harbinger of Minion presence. The government has declared St. Elsewhere a Level 5 Containment Zone, but even with heavy artillery and specialized meme-resistant gear, progress has been slow and incredibly costly.

The sheer number of these creatures is overwhelming. They swarm in tightly packed groups, overwhelming defenses with their relentless, high-pitched babble and surprising agility. Their individual strength is minimal, but en masse, they can topple vehicles, tear down barricades, and engulf entire squads of soldiers. Intelligence suggests these Minions operate with hive-mind coordination, adapting tactics and exploiting weaknesses in human defenses with unnerving efficiency.

Their vulnerability remains a mystery. Conventional weaponry is largely ineffective; bullets pass through their gelatinous bodies, explosions scatter them only temporarily, and even fire seems to have little lasting effect. Whispers circulate among surviving soldiers about weaknesses tied to specific triggers – a high-pitched frequency, a particular shade of purple, or perhaps even the utterance of a trigger phrase from their original meme lore. The government is desperately analyzing this information, hoping to find a hole in their yellow armor. For now, the Minion swarm remains one of the largest, and arguably the most unsettling, threats facing humanity.

Can memes be weaponized?

As the meme apocalypse rages on, a bizarre phenomenon has emerged: in-fighting. The sheer volume of hate and fear directed at the materialized memes has seemingly created a schism within their ranks. Reports are surfacing of meme factions turning on each other, engaging in brutal and often absurd battles for dominance. Doge is biting Pepe, Pepsiman is attacking shrek. The internet has become a literal battlefield.

This internal conflict, while chaotic, offers a glimmer of hope. Some survivors are attempting to exploit this discord, actively stoking the flames of meme rivalry. But an even more surprising development has emerged from an unlikely source: plants.

Reports from isolated settlements describe survivors successfully weaponizing Fume-shrooms, a relatively harmless fungus from the "Plants vs. Zombies" meme. The toxic spores emitted by these mushrooms appear to be highly effective against Minions, causing them to die very quickly. Other "Plants vs. Zombies" plants appear to have varying degrees of effectiveness against specific meme types, however keep in mind that not every plant is friendly. Fume-shrooms are quickly becoming highly valued commodities in the post-apocalyptic world, not only they are one of the most tameable memes, but are also providing a much-needed defense against the Minion scourge, though sources are dwindling and people are looking for more "Plants vs. Zombies" plants.

However, the most ambitious attempts at weaponizing memes themselves have largely failed. The United States, China, Russia, and several other nations have poured resources into projects aimed at harnessing the power of memes for military purposes. Early experiments involved projecting amplified memes onto enemy forces, hoping to induce confusion, fear, or even self-destruction. However, the results have been disastrous. The amplified memes often backfired, spawning unpredictable and even more dangerous meme variants. Countries are no longer weaponizing memes, and they are trying to use plants more often.

The dream of fighting fire with fire, it seems, is nothing more than a fevered delusion. For now, humanity is forced to rely on a fragile combination of brute force, improvised weaponry, and, against all odds, the help of sentient fungi to survive the meme apocalypse. The war is far from over.