Top 1000 ways to get vote kicked

A list of the top 1000 ways to get vote kicked in L4D2

Introduction

The long awaited sequel to "Top 100 ways to get vote kicked"; after 5 days in development, hopefully it will have been worth the wait.

Now contains community contributed suggestions

Recommended audio to enhance the experience
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7wBphRIUSA

1-100

1) Killing your teammates

2) holding the safe room door shut

3) getting to the saferoom first so you can use all the first aid kits

4) bullying people in text chat

5) spamming voice chat and vocalisers

6) starting crescendo events before people are ready

7) revive cancelling

8) healing people on ladders

9) playing as Zoey

10) having less hours of playtime than the person calling the vote

11) missing a death charge

12) getting hit by a death charge

13) only getting 3 kills as a tank

14) playing versus

15) not wanting to play versus

16) shooting gas cans

17) joining an easy lobby and voting to change it to expert

18) joining an expert lobby and voting to change it to easy

19) speedrunning

20) being new to the game

21) having too many hours in the game

22) saying you hate dead centre/ no mercy

23) saying the military sniper is OP

24) bunny hopping

25) booming all 4 survivors at once (not good enough)

26) shooting car alarms

27) using text or voice chat in any way

28) failing to vote kick someone

29) startling a witch intentionally and dying

30) wasting the bile bomb on dark carnival chapter 1

31) beating the dark carnival finale by fighting on the stage instead of camping on the scaffolding

32) using any of the CSS weapons

33) cheating

34) making people think youre cheating because youve got good aim

35) saying "im cheating" in text chat, and people believe you

36) saying "GG" when you lose in versus

37) joining a lobby with Xbox players

38) healing survivor bots

39) healing a teammate trying to speed run

40) being idle for too long

41) using exploits to skip parts of the map

42) trying to use exploits and failing and dying

43) using a defib right outside the safe room

44) going back to help a pinned teammate

45) getting pinned

46) getting smoked at that one hole in dark carnival chapter 3

47) failing to smoke someone at that one hole in dark carnival chapter 3

48) falling off the parish bridge

49) trying to have a "hero moment" by holding off the zombies when your team is waiting for you to get into the rescue vehicle

50) startling a witch, then standing behind your teammate so she kills them instead

51) being a child

52) acting like a child

53) saying hi to people when you join the lobby

54) pretending you dont speak english so you have an excuse not to use text chat

55) complaining about how toxic versus is

56) contributing to versus toxicity

57) wanting to play realism

58) wanting to play a game of versus on anything other than dead centre and no mercy

59) saying l4d2 is better than l4d1

60) providing evidence that l4d2 is in fact much better than l4d1

61) saying you want to play cold stream

62) saying the last stand update was good

63) saying the last stand campaign is good

64) saying you like scavenge finales

65) shooting the cans during a scavenge finale

66) throwing a molotov at a tank during a scavenge finale

67) taking 0.01 seconds too long to help a pinned teammate

68) being a good teammate

69) finishing the campaign with no deaths, incaps, friendly fire, and in record time

70) failing to sacrifice yourself during the sacrifice

71) saying coach is overrated

72) explaining that spamming death screams isnt that funny

73) saying water slowdown isnt that big of a deal

74) liking swamp fever

75) saying the differences between the l4d1 map ports and the originals are negligible

76) not bullying TLS contributors

77) liking B4B

78) saying any other shooter is better than l4d2

79) getting incapped once on expert mode

80) being the only one to not get incapped on expert mode

81) saying expert mode isnt fun

82) liking jockeys

83) camping

84) not camping during any of the l4d1 finales

85) saying "brb" and going idle

86) local hosting

87) local hosting with any mods enabled

88) joining a modded chinese server

89) trying to stop people being racist in text chat

90) voting no when someone calls a vote

91) asking for help with good guy nick

92) liking crash course

93) having a favourite special infected that isnt the hunter

94) having a vote kick called on you before youve even loaded into the server

95) being the last one to the safe room

96) getting too many kills

97) dying when your team abandons you and refuses to go back to help

98) voting to restart the chapter in versus when youre down one point

99) playing l4d2

100) having a reputation for being toxic or a troll, even though youre clearly taking the piss

101-200

101) existing

102) making a skibidi toilet reference

103) breathing

104) joining a game

105) joining a game with a group of 3 friends already in it

106) shoving infected towards your teammates

107) reloading instead of shoving a hunter or jockey off a teammate

108) not knowing how to shove

109) complaining about scavenge finales being too difficult

110) refusing to help your team during a scavenge finale because you are only willing to pick up 1 single gas can

111) having a questionable profile picture

112) being a member of a questionable steam group

113) being a hypocrite

114) trying to make friends with other people in the lobby

115) refusing to make friends with people in the lobby

116) blocking everyone you play with

117) having a tally of how many people youve kicked or blocked on your profile

118) having your PC specs listed on your profile

119) having your PC specs listed on your profile even if theyre not that good

120) thinking people care what PC you have

121) taking obvious bait in text chat

122) trying to bait people in text chat

123) describing yourself as a "master baiter"

124) wasting medical supplies when a teammate is injured

125) 'accidentally' using pills instead of giving them to an injured teammate

126) healing a teammate so that they cant move and they die

127) having low testosterone levels

128) taking a joke way too seriously and raging at your team in chat

129) getting grabbed by a jockey that was lagging a mile behind his hitbox

130) playing as a jockey and failing to grab someone because you were lagging a mile behind your hitbox

131) saying "this game needs a battle pass" in text chat

132) micspamming meme music

133) refusing to help a teammate even though it would only take 5 seconds

134) dying right before the safe room in versus mode

135) using a defib in versus mode

136) offering to defib your dead teammate in versus

137) not letting your teammate be tank after they said "give me tank"

138) saying "give me tank" when your teammate gets tank

139) doing anything other than sitting back and throwing rocks as a tank

140) saying "I am a man of action" when your teammates ask why you rushed in as a tank

141) wanting to play through a finale in versus

142) being a member of the boycott l4d2 group

143) suggesting that l4d2 needs a battle pass

144) using anime skins

145) making anime skins

146) tagging your anime skins as campaigns

147) using the pitchfork

148) jumping on the Rochelle hate bandwagon 4 years too late

149) unironically trying to follow the "Nick Grindset"

150) not laughing when Francis says he hates something

151) not laughing when Ellis tells a Keith story

152) not laughing when Coach mentions food

153) not laughing when Nick swears

154) not laughing when Louis mentions pills

155) not laughing when Zoey makes a movie reference

156) not laughing when Bill mentions he's old

157) laughing when Rochelle says something

158) being racist

159) being sexist

160) joining a game and immediately mag dumping the guy next to you

161) blindly voting yes on every vote thats called

162) not voting to skip the credits

163) voting to skip the credits right before the total infected kills stat shows up

164) being the only female on a team with 3 sexists

165) being on a team with 3 sexists who think you're female

166) being a furry

167) denying being a furry when you have a furry pfp

168) posting links to your youtube channel in text chat

169) accidentally pressing your TF2 "buying all quicksells" bind

170) using your "Special infected ahead" bind in a group of people who just want to play the game

171) thinking other people want you as the team leader

172) declaring yourself as the team leader and telling people what to do

173) falling off the roof of Mercy hospital

174) falling off the roof of the apartments on No Mercy chapter 1

175) accusing people of cheating when you know full well they aren't

176) accusing a legitimate cheater of cheating when his friend is on the server

177) saying Bills death wasn't that sad

178) having #saveTF2 in your name

179) Using explosive rounds when you have a shotgun

180) using the grenade launcher

181) healing a teammate as soon as a crescendo event starts

182) giving a teammate pills while theyre shooting

183) healing a teammate when they're reviving someone

184) healing a teammate when they're standing in spitter goo

185) standing near a molotov cache throwing molotovs for 5 minutes

186) standing near an adrenaline cache using adrenaline for 5 minutes and pretending to overdose

187) saying "im gonna crown the witch" but then startling her

188) saying "let me moli the tank" and missing your molotov

189) using a pipe bomb during hard rain chapter 2

190) getting off the burger tank roof during the hard rain finale

191) holding out anywhere other than the pier during the death toll finale

192) holding out anywhere other than the tanker during the dead air finale

193) proving that the blood harvest finale is way easier if you hold out behind the house instead of inside it

194) attempting the chaos generator achievement

195) attempting the connecting flights achievement

196) attempting the main attraction achievement

197) telling people to use SAM instead of grinding for achievements

198) voting to turn all talk on in versus

199) voting to turn all talk off in versus

200) not properly reading through all things on this list and realising its a joke

201-300

201) saying zonemod is a really ♥♥♥♥ way of playing the game and ruins the experience

202) liking Lewd4Dead servers

203) hosting Lewd4Dead servers

204) playing on Lewd4Dead servers

205) forgetting you're not playing CS2 and trying to use the AWP

206) hosting a local server without sv_pausable 0 enabled

207) saying the other team has a skill issue when you beat them

208) saying your team has a skill issue when you get beaten

209) calling your teammates ♥♥♥♥

210) saying "all me" after placing 4th for every stat during the credits

211) going idle to avoid being healed

212) going idle to kill witches with a molotov

213) shoving after firing the shotgun

214) using a T1 weapon because it has a laser on it

215) using any melee other than the fire axe, katana or machete

216) saying the shovel is underrated

217) running the game on the lowest settings when you dont need to

218) using a competitive config when you dont need to

219) trying to bunnyhop and failing

220) bunny hopping as a tank

221) bunny hopping into a tank

222) shooting car alarms in the car yard

223) using pipe bombs in the car yard

224) not using the free, almost guaranteed ammo upgrade in the car yard

225) shooting boomers in the car yard

226) raging at your teammates when they all start setting off the car alarms in the car yard

227) shooting infected that were near a teammates pipe bomb

228) kill stealing

229) wasting bile so you can farm kills

230) having obviously farmed stats

231) using a minigun and expecting your teammates to cover you

232) using a minigun during a tank fight

233) piling all the cans up during a scavenge finale and then shooting them on purpose

234) throwing gnome chomsky somewhere where he can't be picked up

235) offering to carry gnome chomsky and then leaving him outside the safe room

236) rushing ahead while your teammates try to win gnome chomsky

237) not enjoying dark carnival

238) grenade boosting

239) using cheese spots to beat crescendos

240) not using cheese spots during crescendos because you want to have fun

241) playing games other than l4d2

242) liking games other than l4d2

243) mentioning games other than l4d2

244) wanting the game to get major updates

245) wanting the game to change in any way

246) not wanting the game to get any dev support

247) acknowledging other peoples hypocrisy

248) being on Jimmys list

249) having a ban on your profile

250) saying the ban on your profile was false

251) saying the ban on your profile is from when you got hacked, or your brother was using your account

252) lying

253) trying to start movements related to l4d2

254) using a weapon because you find it fun

255) using anything other than the mil sniper or AK in versus

256) finding a witch in versus and saying it would be easier to crown her if you had a shotgun instead of an AK or mil sniper

257) accusing someone of cheating because they headshot you as a hunter

258) cheating so that you can headshot hunters

259) switching teams in versus

260) switching to the winning team right before the game ends

261) switching to the losing team to even things up a bit

262) switching teams so you can actively throw the game

263) throwing the game in general

264) trying to help incapped teammates in versus

265) getting the most damage in versus

266) getting the most points in versus

267) not getting any damage in versus

268) ♥♥♥♥ talking someone even though you got less damage than them

269) saying "gg" when you get death charged at the start of the parish

270) messing up the death charge at the start of the parish

271) saying you dont know how to do death charges

272) saying you dont like death charges

273) saying death charges take a lot of the fun out of the game

274) saying that dying instantly with almost to way to react isnt very fun

275) saying the smoker is balanced

276) staying as a spitter the entire round even though youve got the most damage

277) getting too many kills in versus

278) stealing someones kill in versus

279) ignoring your team when they say "sync up" in chat

280) saying "no" after your team tells you to sync up

281) rushing in 0.1 seconds too late during the sync attack

282) only getting 2 kills and an incap during the sync attack

283) not knocking every survivor off the bridge as soon as the parish finale starts

284) attacking the survivors before they lower the bridge

285) missing a rock throw as a tank

286) having your spit get caught on weird geometry and get no damage

287) having your vomit pass right through a survivor without coating them

288) not treating the game as if the fate of the world depends on you winning

289) asking for tips or advice

290) getting lost

291) going back for supplies when you run out

292) standing still for more than 1 second on expert difficulty

293) using all the medkits at the start of hard rain chapter 2

294) wasting defibs because you want the achievement

295) throwing the game because you tried to get an achievement

296) playing survival mode with people who actually like survival mode

297) not getting 1 hour+ on your first attempt at a survival map with a group of randoms

298) ignoring your teammates advice

299) listening to your teammates advice and then doing the exact opposite

300) not being able to take a joke

301-400

301) saying versus is unbalanced in favour of the survivors

302) pretending you cant read so that you have a good excuse to ignore your teammates advice

303) forcing other people to use text chat because youve turned off voice chat

304) trying to solo the tank

305) leaving the safe room to help a teammate

306) staying in the safe room when your teammates need help

307) using any kind of script

308) telling a Nick main that they're trying too hard to be edgy

309) telling the 45 year old unemployed man playing as Bill that you dont care how many hours he has in the game

310) telling a porn addicted Zoey main that she's not the most attractive woman to ever exist

311) telling a Louis main to stop spamming their vocalizer

312) telling a Francis main to communicate with the team instead of treating the game like its singleplayer

313) telling an Ellis main that rednecks are annoying

314) telling a Coach main that "Coachsexual" isn't a real thing

315) telling a Rochelle main to go more than 15 seconds without a friendly fire incident

316) missing the cola throw

317) refusing to heal because you might need the kit for later

318) dying because you didnt heal up earlier

319) using the spare medkits in the safe room that the group was going to leave behind anyway

320) using voice chat when your voice is moderately high pitched

321) having a bad mic

322) having no mic

323) sending people too many friend requests

324) treating the game as a personal roleplay session

325) complaining about how TLS fixed your favourite exploits

326) abusing unpatched exploits that your team doesnt know how to use

327) staying in the safe room as your team fights the tank

328) hosting a cold stream server

329) saying cold stream is a good map

330) saying cold stream is good because its hard

331) not being good enough to beat a map thats actually hard

332) being high while you play

333) going idle so you can roll a joint

334) going idle so you can take your dog outside

335) going idle so you can smoke the joint you just rolled, but staying at your PC so you can chat to people

336) using your mic when theres a barking dog, crying baby and vacuum in the background

337) encouraging new players to play versus mode

338) being a new player in versus mode

339) forgetting youre not playing TF2, and trying to rocket jump

340) shutting doors after you enter them so your teammates get blocked

341) shooting doors that were being used to block the infected

342) not singlehandedly wiping the other team in versus after your team all dies

343) treating the game like youre in singleplayer

344) saying "nr" at the start of a versus round and then rushing

345) saying "nr" at the start of a versus round when you have a legitimate reason to not be ready

346) having a reputation for rage quitting

347) having a reputation for making other people rage quit

348) being a youtuber

349) having a fully private profile

350) being russian

351) being a russian child

352) being an Xbox player

353) shooting people as a joke

354) shoving people to make their screen shake

355) walking into the line of fire repeatedly

356) not jumping across the float in the parish chapter 4 before the music finishes

357) using too many callouts

358) not using any callouts

359) deliberately using the wrong callouts

360) spamming "I'm coming" voice lines whilst pressing W and S when youre behind someone

361) having an obviously fake number of hours on the game

362) refusing the play the game unless you get to be your favourite survivor

363) unlocking every achievement with steam achievement manager

364) comparing L4D2 with B4B

365) saying B4B wasnt even that bad

366) trying to justify B4B costing 100 times more than L4D2

367) comparing L4D2 with Helldivers 2

368) comparing L4D2 with DRG

369) saying that other games can be fun too

370) having an opinion

371) being known for writing l4d2 fan fictions

372) being known for posting untagged nsfw art on the art forum

373) being known for posting contextless screenshots of Zoey titled "Zoey" on the art forum

374) straying slightly too far from your team

375) having no situational awareness

376) having your game muted

377) ignoring the on screen prompts

378) trying to use shortcuts

379) complaining when nobody on your team wants to use shortcuts

380) getting pinned when you use a shortcut

381) complaining that nobody is helping you after you got pinned when using a shortcut

382) rejoining a lobby you just left

383) trying to get into the secret room in the last stand

384) saying dead centre is overrated

385) camping in the elevator on dead centre chapter 1 versus because a tank spawned outside it

386) standing on the moving plank on swamp fever chapter 4 while its being lowered

387) joining a public lobby while the host was waiting for their friend to join

388) joining a friends only lobby via the server browser

389) joining someones lobby via their profile even though you arent friends

390) asking for someone to heal you

391) being incapped on easy mode

392) the lobby is being held hostage

393) being French

394) running ahead to get points in versus as your team is about to die

395) having high ping

396) being British

397) having a religion

398) having a sexuality

399) rushing ahead to kill all the infected before anybody else can

400) getting upset over a forum post

401-500

401) saving supplies for the next round in versus

402) trying to be friendly in versus

403) telling the survivors where the supplies are in versus

404) waiting for all 3 of your teammates to appear in the closet before you open it

405) the host has admin mods enabled

406) throwing bile on a tank

407) using a molotov for anything other than a tank

408) using a pipe bomb on a tank

409) having the keys on your keyboard fall off

410) having your blutooth mouse disconnect

411) being associated with a known cheater

412) having your house be raided by the feds mid game

413) playing on a literal potato

414) playing on a figurative potato

415) listing your PC specs in your profile description

416) having the mods from a chinese server persist when you local host

417) forgetting youre not playing portal and trying to spawn in an airboat to skip part of the map

418) forgetting youre not playing Artifact and uninstalling mid game

419) forgetting youre not playing L4D1 and trying to sniper smokers with an autoshotgun

420) forgetting youre not playing half life and exclusively running the crowbar

421) shooting gas cans as you walk past them to block your teammates

422) shooting a propane tank to help a pinned teammate... after the special infected is dead

423) summoning infinite hordes on No mercy using bile bombs

424) shooting a teammate in realism mode

425) breaking line of sight with your team in realism mode

426) playing realism mode

427) playing expert realism mode

428) telling your team that achievements are worth it

429) playing with a troll who wants to stop you getting an achievement

430) forgetting there isnt an achievement for being vote kicked

431) being political

432) placing the fireworks too close together during the dark carnival finale

433) using the frying pan

434) saying the frying pan is a decent weapon

435) swinging the frying pan constantly in an attempt to be funny

436) leaving a negative review for the game

437) being the only one on the team without a vocalizer

438) taking the game way too seriously

439) not taking the game seriously when everyone else is

440) pointing out that the game is a decade and a half old and theres no reason to be so serious about it

441) refusing to heal the most useless member on your team

442) complaining about being kicked

443) complaining about other people being kicked

444) complaining about other people calling too many votes

445) complaining about other people complaining

446) calling someones fan fiction stupid

447) calling someones head canon stupid

448) having a head canon

449) forcing your head canon onto others

450) having a head canon that makes no sense lore wise

451) playing with a manchild

452) being a manchild

453) being friends with a manchild

454) refusing to kick the manchild on the team

455) jumping too often

456) trying to sneak by crouching

457) asking where the sprint button is

458) asking how to ADS

459) saying L4D2 would be better if it had ADS

460) asking how you use your killstreaks

461) thinking versus will be fun

462) saying versus isnt fun

463) saying versus is fun

464) being an NSFW SFM artist

465) asking an honest question

466) complimenting your teammates

467) having teammates that dont understand sarcasm

468) joining a lobby and immediately choosing Nick

469) joining a versus lobby with 3 friends and all choosing the same team

470) being the survivor the host wants to play as

471) spawning in as an infected that your teammate wanted

472) jumping around the skybox as a hunter instead of attacking the survivors

473) taking slightly too long to clear a horde of common infected

474) getting any more or any less than 25% of the kills

475) using more medkits than everyone else combined

476) joining a game and remaining idle until youre on the rescue vehicle

477) failing to get into the APC at the end of blood harvest

478) suggesting that you camp in the barn during the blood harvest finale

479) getting lost in the cornfield in the blood harvest finale

480) falling out that one window in blood harvest

481) having a strong opinion about blood harvest

482) spamming voicelines near the microphone during the dark carnival finale

483) standing near the forklifts during the dark carnival finale

484) stopping to play the carnival games during the blood harvest finale

485) getting smoked at the top of the hill in blood harvest

486) triggering a car alarm and then holding the safe room door shut

487) annoying an admin

488) forgetting youre not an admin and trying to kick people

489) forgetting youre not an admin and trying to spawn extra items in

490) saying "!scramble" when you lose the 4th round in a row in versus

491) forgetting youre not in a jailbreak server and trying to order people around

492) forgetting youre not playing pyro and trying to airblast a tank rock

493) forgetting youre not playing Modern Warfare 2 and going for quickscopes

494) trying to get flashy kills for your frag montage

495) making l4d2 frag montages

496) using mods that let you see special infected through walls

497) live streaming

498) telling people not to be racist because youre live streaming

499) telling people to stop playing copyrighted music because youre live streaming

500) threatening to block people because they make forum posts that arent achievement help requests or questions that could be answered in seconds with a google search

501-600

501) being hundreds of dollars in debt after investing all your money into food themed bedding, and then trying to sell it to the other players in your versus game

502) use a mod to make the dead centre helicopter louder

503) have the M60 as your most used weapon

504) saying the burst rifle is good

505) going idle so you can go to the toilet

506) going idle so you can eat

507) lying about why you're going idle

508) reciting Keith stories over VC

509) standing near an alarmed car as a boomer and getting sniped

510) throwing a molotov at a tank thats already on fire

511) throwing a molotov at a tank your teammate is standing next to

512) throwing a molotov at a witch

513) throwing a molotov at a witch while your teammate is trying to crown it

514) throwing a molotov on an incapped teammate

515) throwing a molotov on a dead teammate to cremate them

516) roleplaying as a drunkard by only holding a molotov and shoving

517) roleplaying as a drug addict by only holding adrenaline and shoving

518) complaining about how L4D1 had better starter pistols instead of just using a mod to fix it

519) trying to flirt with other people in the lobby

520) refusing to date someone you just met in a L4D2 lobby

521) threatening people in the lobby

522) threatening to kick other people in the lobby

523) threatening to block other people in the lobby

524) pretending to dox other people in the lobby

525) actually doxing other people in the lobby

526) pretending to be a hacker

527) pretending to be a cheater

528) offering to give people cheating scripts

529) trying to bypass VAC

530) offering to help people bypass VAC

531) pretending to be a good teammate, then killing everyone right before the rescue vehicle

532) saying hard 8 isnt that good

533) using an aim trainer

534) telling people you main sniper in TF2

535) telling people you main spy in TF2

536) trying to sell your overpriced unusuals in the lobby

537) marking your local host server as official

538) refusing to change the server setting to best available when youve already failed to find an official server 3 times

539) suggesting to change the server setting to best available when the host has already failed to find an official server 3 times

540) offering to local host

541) using more than 1 voiceline per chapter

542) liking sewer levels

543) saying sewer levels are well designed and fun

544) saying sewers levels arent just an easy and lazy way of making a campaign longer

545) walking through the water in a sewer level even though theres walkways

546) liking riot cops

547) saying riot cops are fun to fight

548) liking swampy mudmen

549) saying swampy mudmen are fun to fight

550) saying swampy mudmen are balanced in realism mode

551) using a shotgun beyond point blank in realism mode

552) getting hit by a tank in expert mode

553) shooting the tank while downed in expert mode

554) going anywhere near a witch in realism mode

555) not camping in survival mode

556) camping somewhere away from your team in survival mode

557) making any mistake in survival mode

558) ignoring your teammates in survival mode

559) playing survival mode when you know youre not good enough for it

560) complaining about expert mode toxicity

561) wandering off in expert mode

562) wasting your medkit in expert mode

563) asking when L4D3 will release

564) saying L4D3 should have levels and unlockables

565) saying L4D3 should have microtransactions

566) having a cheap steam inventory

567) having a low steam level

568) bragging about how many hours you have in the game

569) showcasing your hours on your profile

570) thinking playtime directly correlates with skill

571) saying youre better than someone because you have more hours of playtime than them

572) faking your playtime

573) faking your playtime to maintain your position as #1 worldwide even though youre ♥♥♥♥ at the game

574) mentioning the japanese arcade port

575) saying you dont mind L4D2s atmosphere

576) saying L4D1 didnt have a better atmosphere

577) saying L4D1 had just as many jokes and gags as L4D2

578) asking why Francis hating things is funny, but Keith stories arent

579) saying L4D1 is a dead game

580) playing with -lv in your launch options

581) using an FPS tracker

582) playing with more than 60 FPS

583) forgetting youre not playing DayZ and asking your team if they have any magazines in good condition

584) forgetting youre not playing Dead Rising and trying to beat the campaign over the course of 3 days

585) forgetting youre not playing Black Ops and trying to board up the windows

586) asking where the pack a punch machine is

587) using a jukebox

588) shooting the L4D1 survivors during the passing

589) jumping down the hole first in the passing

590) asking your team if they heard the very loud and very obvious midnight riders bus go past

591) asking your team what their favourite midnight riders song is

592) saying you hate the midnight riders

593) standing near the oil tanker as whitaker shoots it

594) not standing near the fence as Virgil shoots it

595) blocking the rescue vehicle with a molotov

596) accidentally blocking the rescue vehicle with a molotov because you were trying to block the zombies

597) throwing a pipe bomb towards the rescue vehicle

598) going idle so you can fix your broken keyboard

599) having your cat jump on your keyboard

600) blocking people, but then replying to all their forum posts anyway

601-700

601) playing with mars wifi

602) playing with Australian wifi

603) playing on a singapore server

604) expecting a singapore server not to implode when you join

605) playing on a russian server

606) asking a russian player what their VAC ban was for

607) saying youre from a Greek island, when in reality youre from New South Wales

608) staying in spectator mode

609) narrating the game

610) offering to DJ for the team

611) DJing for the team

612) not DJing after you offered to

613) saying youre fine with high ping when youre not

614) requeueing to find a server with better ping and failing

615) walking past supplies without picking anything up

616) running out of ammo

617) not reloading during downtime

618) not healing yourself when youre about to die

619) refusing to be healed by your teammates because youve "been through worse before"

620) asking how to call a vote

621) asking how to vote

622) asking who voted F2

623) being the one who voted F2

624) admitting to voting F2

625) following someone from server to server so you can keep kicking them

626) complaining about how unplayable a game with a singleplayer mode is

627) flooding servers with bot accounts

628) mass reporting people using bot accounts

629) fabricating screenshots as evidence to use against the people you reported

630) complaining about getting banned for false reporting

631) making fake VAC bypass scripts

632) skipping your parents funeral to play L4D2

633) referring to the survivors by their file names

634) recording your gameplay with hypercam

635) voting to restart when 3 people die within the first minute

636) following someone from server to server so you can make fun of them

637) noticably changing the pitch of your voice every time you use VC

638) telling people not to votekick the bad player because hes your friend

639) telling people not to votekick the bad player because hes your younger brother

640) playing with your younger brother

641) forgetting youre not playing fortnite and trying to build

642) making any joke that relates to gen Alpha humour

643) being unemployed

644) talking as if youre in the military

645) telling people you were in the military

646) acting better than your teammates because you were in the military

647) losing it over a minor joke

648) calling someone ♥♥♥♥ at the game

649) liking lethal company

650) saying lethal company doesnt look like it was made in Roblox

651) asking what weapon you should use

652) going for headshots with a sniper

653) trying to justifying the M16

654) pointing out that L4D1s story doesnt make much sense

655) calling the L4D2 community toxic

656) saying that L4D2 players will kick people for no reason

657) getting kicked for no reason

658) getting kicked because its funny

659) saying that kicking people for no reason will probably scare off new players

660) asking when the next free weekend is

661) asking if a free weekend player can help you get good guy nick

662) playing a pirated version of the game

663) asking L4D2 players if L4D2 is a good game

664) saying anything negative about L4D2

665) saying something positive about L4D2

666) setting your team name to "Satan" and joining a christian server

667) setting your steam name to "Stan" and joining a server full of dyslexic christians

668) being a dyslexic christian

669) complaining about random bullet spread

670) complaining about random item spawns

671) complaining about random tank spawns

672) saying "I dont speak chinese" to someone who is clearly not speaking chinese

673) misreading the mood of the lobby

674) joining a lobby that someone forgot to set to private

675) joining someones lobby after they made it clear they dont want to play with you

676) turning off the screen prompts, and then not knowing when your teammates need help

677) disabling the HUD and then not knowing how much health you have

678) writing a review for the game

679) playing singleplayer mode

680) getting stuck while playing rocketdude

681) stalling votes

682) saying youll be back in a minute and then never coming back

683) running off to get ammo in survival

684) wasting grenades in survival

685) shooting something other than the tank in survival mode

686) dying in survival mode at 9:59:99

687) not helping a pinned teammate because theres a tank on you

688) standing near a car during a tank fight

689) standing away from a car during a tank fight and getting hit anyway because geometry is weird

690) hosting a local server with a low gravity mod enabled

691) not liking glubtastic

692) wanting to play glubtastic

693) saying glubtastic is unfair because its just unavoidable random ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

694) playing zonemod

695) forgetting youre not playing zonemod and not grabbing a medkit

696) forgetting youre not playing zonemod and asking how the other team has AKs

697) forgetting youre not playing zonemod and having fun

698) saying you play competitive

699) saying Valve should sponsor a competitive tournament

700) failing to understand satire

701-800

701) not using any mods

702) using too many mods

703) making people wait while your mods load

704) having to rejoin a lobby because you need to fix your mods

705) butchering the game with mods such that it no longer resembles L4D2

706) playing with an Xbox controller

707) playing in splitscreen mode

708) going idle so you can change the batteries in your Xbox controller

709) reciting the definition of insanity speech when your team restarts for the 5th time

710) saying "Im Sanic" after you use adrenaline

711) asking where the hidden collectibles are

712) asking where the daily login reward button is

713) asking if the battle pass is worth it

714) asking whats in the item shop

715) falling off the bugged ledge above the ladder in the parish finale

716) trying to shove a tank

717) trying to shove a charger

718) shoving a boomer towards a teammate

719) shoving a boomer until it explodes

720) shooting a boomer when your teammate is trying to shove it

721) shoving a witch

722) shooting a witch with anything other than a shotgun

723) ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ up the propane trick on a witch

724) vaping over VC

725) flexing your admin privelages

726) forgetting youre not playing GMod and trying to spawn in props

727) kill binding

728) making everyone else in the lobby wait while you invite your friend

729) refusing to play the game unless you get to be your favourite character

730) using sprays

731) using NSFW Zoey sprays

732) trying to cover up the NSFW Zoey spray with your own spray

733) playing with sprays turned off

734) asking where the Groom Tank is

735) calling Coach fat

736) wasting all the molotovs in the swamp fever finale before the double tank

737) pissing someone off right before the game ends

738) asking to be votekicked

739) choosing your survivor based on the size of their hitbox

740) thinking the size of your survivors hitbox matters

741) refusing to improve at the game instead of relying on things like a smaller hitbox

742) making balance suggestions

743) critiqueing others balance suggestions

744) saying the game is perfectly balanced as is

745) using rebalance mods

746) asking irrelevant questions

747) asking a new player to do anything

748) claiming to work for Valve

749) claiming to be Gabe Newell

750) claiming Gabe Newell is your dad

751) claiming you can get people banned because your dad works for Valve

752) being forum banned

753) spreading false rumours about how SAM works

754) spamming Gabe Newells inbox every day until he bans you from steam

755) refusing to use a standard melee attack as a special infected

756) using dual pistols instead of a deagle

757) claiming you used the knife before it got buffed

758) falling off the coaster in dark carnival

759) forgetting to press the button on the coaster in dark carnival

760) trying to skip the coaster

761) shooting the gas station in No Mercy

762) trying to kill your teammates by shooting the gas station in hard rain

763) local hosting on your 2005 Dell Inspiron

764) not using grenades when your team is surrounded

765) using pills the instant your teammate shares them with you

766) using the spitters ability on anything other than a pinned survivor

767) playing as a jockey with more than 15 ping

768) refusing to leave the safe room

769) roleplaying as a cashier when youre in the burger tank

770) liking the hard rain finale

771) going back for a medkit and dying

772) saying "youve been left 4 dead" after abandoning your teammates

773) telling your team to go on without you even though they could still very easily save you

774) refusing to shoot your pistols while youre downed

775) accidentally giving pills to a bot

776) having your steam name be the same as one of the survivors

777) swearing too much

778) getting mad at people for swearing

779) telling people to calm down when they get mad

780) not being able to hear in game because youre listening to music

781) turning the game music off and then being surprised by hordes and specials

782) thinking the cold stream tank fight is a good set piece

783) opening the safe room door in cold stream chapter 2

784) having your computer crash whole youre local hosting

785) going idle while local hosting

786) having a reputation for kicking everyone you play with

787) having open mic enabled, but not talking

788) not muting your mic when people tell you to

789) screaming into your mic when you take damage

790) threatening to shut down your local host server

791) launching denial of service attacks on the other players in the lobby

792) launching denial of service attacks on other servers

793) spreading misinformation about the state of the games servers

794) standing near the water during the first swamp fever crescendo

795) using every single resource you find as soon as you find it

796) looting the security room in the dead center chapter 1 crescendo

797) not opening rescue closets

798) opening rescue closets before people respawn in them

799) opening rescue closets and then killing your teammates

800) getting mad over jokes meant for other people

801-900

801) lobby hopping

802) refusing to heal anybody except your friend

803) refusing to help any pinned teammate that isnt your friend

804) refusing to sync up with anybody who isnt your friend

805) inviting someone to your lobby when theyre already in a game

806) offering to join a game, and then leaving because youve got other things to do

807) reloading after you fire a single shot

808) forgetting youre not playing battlefield hardcore and only reloading when your magazine is empty

809) asking how you emote

810) mentioning fortnite

811) saying the game is dead

812) playing a game on your phone instead of paying attention

813) sitting idle in the lobby youre hosting

814) making fun of other players due to abitrary factors

815) reading the IGN review for L4D and comparing how they describe each survivor

816) trying to turn L4D2 into another game using mods

817) trying to turn another game into L4D2 using mods

818) playing any L4D2 clone

819) calling a game a L4D2 clone

820) pointing out the many improvements made by the last stand update

821) liking the shovel

822) refusing to use any melee except the shovel out of a misplaced sense of obligation

823) refusing to use any primary except a shotgun out of a misplaced sense of obligation

824) having a TF2 Uber profile picture

825) having a TF2 reference in your name

826) refusing to stand still, even for a second

827) making guides that explain how to open the game or walk

828) buying the game outside of a sale

829) asking if one of the most popular games on steam is worth it when its 90% off

830) treating L4D2 like a dating sim

831) having hentai or furry games on your profile

832) being a member of the hentai group

833) being a member of a lolicon group

834) forgetting youre not playing eurotruck simulator and wondering why theres zombies

835) forgetting youre not playing fallout and trying to enter vats

836) having a steam name that contains symbols

837) refusing to leave the server after being asked to

838) asking why you keep getting kicked

839) wondering why youre the only one who ever seems to get vote kicked

840) failing to realise that its probably your own fault you keep getting vote kicked

841) failing to realise that a lot of votekicks in L4D2 are for no reason whatsoever and its not your fault

842) letting a single vote kick put you in a bad mood for the rest of the day

843) being bad at the game

844) being too good at the game

845) choosing Nick and immediately rushing

846) asking why Zoeys pain sounds are the way they are

847) saying the words "fully modelled" when theres a half life fan in the server

848) micspamming Tick Tock when theres a TF2 player in the server

849) not reading the sacrifice comic

850) not bursting into tears when someone mentions Bill dying'

851) having "RIP Rick May" in your steam name

852) making a minor error during a discussion related to the games timeline

853) liking advanced difficulty

854) only playing on easy difficulty

855) using a mod to remove friendly fire

856) using a mod to increase friendly fire

857) using a mod to reflect friendly fire

858) telling your teammate to stop shooting you

859) watching the intro cinematic in its entirety every time you play

860) not liking the intro cinematic

861) repeating quotes from the game over VC

862) having a mic that echos

863) thinking that the quality of someones mic matters given how bad the games audio processing is

864) playing with a keyboard that has no S key

865) playing with a keyboard that has all the movement keys held in place with electrical tape

866) going idle so you can replace the electrical tape thats holding your movement keys in place

867) typing +attack in console

868) unbinding M2

869) pressing alt + tab

870) refusing to play anything other than weird, niche community maps that stray from L4D2s core gameplay

871) refusing to play anything other than Valve made campaigns

872) playing while youre high

873) playing while youre drunk

874) having a seizure mid game

875) pretending to aimbot by looking up and spinning

876) getting an insanely lucky flickshot while pretending to aimbot

877) using "wallhacks" (hearing special infected through walls)

878) floating up to the skybox

879) getting stuck on the skybox

880) getting stuck on the skybox when your team is waiting for you to enter the rescue vehicle

881) trying to revive someone whos swarmed by commons

882) not shoving the commons that are preventing you from reviving someone

883) suggesting they make a L4D2 movie

884) suggesting Valve sell the rights to L4D2 to another company

885) trying to snipe tank rocks instead of just moving out of the way

886) trying to parkour around the tank instead of running away

887) playing russian roulette with an autoshotgun

888) being worse at the game than the AI survivor bots

889) joining a game with your friend so its harder to vote kick you

890) thinking the games gore tag was more of a LiveLeak sort of thing rather than just killing zombies

891) having sympathy for Zoey because she had to shoot her father

892) believing Ellis's Keith stories

893) refusing to answer the radio in swamp fever because you hate Cajuns

894) trying to drink the gasoline

895) being scared of the infected

896) mentioning burger tank in front of a Coach fan

897) thinking the amount of common infected kills you get actually matters

898) bragging abuout your end of round scores

899) threatening to kick the guy who gets the lowest score at the end of the round

900) thinking a list of 1000 ways to get votekicked, where most of the list is either unrelated to being votekicked or wouldnt result in a votekick, was written in seriousness

901-1000

901) getting the lowest score at the end of the round

902) only scoring enough points in versus to make your total a nice round number due to your crippling OCD

903) correcting peoples grammatical errors in chat

904) stopping to type something during a horde event

905) stopping to say something in VC because you have it bound to a very inconvenient button

906) advertising your TF2 pocket medic services to people who couldnt care less

907) starting a L4D2 healing service

908) charging people money whenever you heal them

909) keeping the pills as a ransom

910) making people beg before you revive them

911) saying the plane in the dead air finale shouldve crashed somewhere else

912) promoting your twitch channel mid game

913) letting your twitch viewers play with you

914) leaving after you die in versus so people think you rage quit

915) saying "GG" when your team is 50 points ahead

916) forgetting youre not playing far cry and trying to do a takedown on an infected

917) playing L4D2 while youre at work and getting caught

918) playing L4D2 using your mobile data

919) playing L4D2 while youre on the train because you missed your stop and have nothing better to do while you travel halfway across the state

920) playing L4D2 at the airport with your headphones unplugged and volume cranked up

921) telling the flight attendant youre going to "recreate dead air"

922) moving to savannah Georgia irl and realising its not like it is in L4D2

923) moving to Pennsylvania irl and realising it is like L4D1 without the zombies

924) questioning whitakers choice of drink

925) refusing to drop the cola to shoot the horde thats surrounding you

926) setting up a cola relay line and then accidentally dropping it

927) stopping to use adrenaline before you perform an action

928) using adrenaline before doing something that doesnt get sped up by adrenaline

929) spamming F moments before remembering youre epileptic

930) accidentally misclicking M1 as youre scrolling through your weapons

931) expecting veteran players in a 2009 Source game to not be racist and homophobic

932) contributing to the racism and homophobia of the early 2000s Source game playerbase

933) saying or doing anything when youre playing with someone who has 10k hours in the game

934) giving veteran players any excuse to be racist or homophobic

935) calling your pipes and molis as if they were flashes

936) suggesting that you eco the next chapter

937) asking the other team to kick someone

938) bribing the other team to kick someone

939) practicing your stand up comedy routine over VC

940) finding the headshot mutation fun

941) accidentally letting go of W during a Tank Run match

942) shooting a car in a rocket dude match

943) suggesting they make a prop hunt mutation

944) suggesting they release paid cosmetic cases

945) complaining about the servers being down

946) complaining about the servers being down when literally nothing is wrong with them

947) asking how to avoid modded chinese servers

948) refusing to use SAM for achievements even though literally nobody else would care

949) asking what the easiest campaign to play on versus mode is

950) leaving your teammate on the other side of a one way

951) throwing a grenade to help your teammate whos been trapped on the other side of a one way, and killing them

952) getting stuck inside map geometry

953) hiding inside the safe room to avoid a tank on expert mode

954) saying they should make L4D2 Funko Pops

955) posting something to the art forum that isnt porn, Zoey, AI generated Bill, or a reposted meme

956) offering BJs inside the various toilets around the map

957) distracting people from the tank during the hard rain finale by pointing out the zombies banging on the toilet door

958) camping inside the portaloo during the hard rain finale

959) using the 50 Cal during the swamp fever finale

960) pointing out the part in the intro cinematic where Coachs shirt clips into his head\

961) nitpicking over minor animation details

962) promoting your overpriced SFM commission service to the other players in the lobby

963) being relatively normal

964) pulling your weight and being a decent teammate

965) explaining, in detail, your ideas for L4D3

966) coming up with poorly balanced special infected concepts

967) shooting the ragdolls of already dead infected

968) shooting your dead teammates so they dont turn into zombies

969) sacrificing yourself to a horde for no reason

970) adopting an "everyone lives or everyone dies" mentality

971) saying that everyone just denies purple Francis's existence due to the Mandela effect

972) forgetting youre not playing Sonic 3 and wondering where the blue spheres are

973) asking your teammate if theyre stupid when they ask a simple question

974) expecting a fresh install to know everything about the game

975) not knowing everything about the game when youre a fresh install

976) actin like ya got a thick southern accent when youre playin as Ellis, even though ya aint got one in real life or nothin, youre just puttin it on cause its funny

977) rating every single custom campaign a 9/10 regardless of its quality

978) making a custom campaign that has an insane difficulty spike halway through

979) making a custom campaign thats way too long

980) throwing a second tank into the mix because you dont know how to balance your custom campaign

981) thinking the last stand finale has a good tank fight because it has metal music

982) pulling the "Quit Smoking" prank

983) preventing me from getting 10k Witch damage on the sugar mill (you know who you are)

984) adding 1000 to this entry, and then complaining about authoritarianism

985) complaining about Rochelles lack of personality even though she got her cut lines restored

986) using mods that alter Coach (peak human form) in any way

987) asking for technical support without first verifying the game files

988) not realising you have a flashlight

989) shooting the Jimmy Gibbs Jnr in front of a passionate Ellis main

990) asking an Ellis main a basic maths question

991) asking a Coach main how many hours of exercise they get each week

992) asking a Rochelle main what brought them to this moment in their life

993) asking a Nick main how many years they have left of middle school

994) asking a Zoey main about their browsing history

995) asking a Bill main how much the government pays them to sit at home all day playing L4D2

996) asking a Louis main if they know any other jokes

997) asking a Francis main to do more than the bare minimum to help out

998) commenting without reading the entire list because youre mad at me

999) not reading every 100th entry in particular even though youre the kind of person they apply to

1000) proving my point

[IntergalacticFrog™]

l4d2 ick list

[Geebanger0]

https://tenor.com/en-GB/view/vaas-far-cry3-that-is-crazy-gif-26006603

[citrussy <3]

this is my favourite guide so i just gave it more awards :3

[Gun girls best Raifu <3]

real

[Mincoiin | ツ]

I read all of this, 10/10 would read again

[Geebanger0]

https://i.pinimg.com/474x/fe/30/4d/fe304db19b1fee6896e5449324569fd8.jpg

[citrussy <3]

ok i gave you all of my steam points

[Geebanger0]

you owe me

[citrussy <3]

uhh it helped idk lol

[Geebanger0]

also whats this guide gotta do with your awards