Somebody teach me electric guitar please
Decadent
Scatterbrain

Journal:
February 19th

I need a therapist, an English speaking one in Poland. Too bad they all cost an insane amount of money. I've been dissociating a lot, I think it's a stress response to ♥♥♥♥ that happened. I should be having a mental breakdown every day with how bad I'm doing, but I just feel neutral. How do I embrace the feelings and all that's happened?

February 20th

I couldnt get out of the bath for 3 hours because i counldnt bare imagining how cold it would be for literally 3 minutes. That's pretty pathetic. Drank some nice fresh apple juice though. Slept almost all day and all night. Today i try to work on my diet a bit to stop being underweight, I'll also try to cut down on the junky type food. From sweets to proccesed meals i suppose.
I've been recently dreaming of smoking cigarettes, which was one thing i cannot understand the appeal of it, expensive, toxic, bad tasting. Now i crave cigarettes.