penis

After a good game in csgo, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.
I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, i felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy!

The Emperor's New Groove Script
Will you take a look at that?
Pretty pathetic, huh?
Well, you'll never believe his,
but that llama you're looking at
was once a human being.
And not just any human being.
That guy was an emperor.
A rich, powerful ball of charisma.
Oh, yeah!
This is his story.
Well, actually, my story.
That's right...
I'm that llama.
The name is Kuzco...
Emperor Kuzco.
I was the world's nicest guy,
and they ruined my life for no reason.
Oh, is that hard to believe?
Look, I tell you what.
You go back a ways,
you know, before I was a llama
and this will all make sense.
All right, now see. That's a little
too far back. Oh! Look at me.
That's me as a baby.
Ahem.
All right, let's move ahead.

Woah, nice ♥♥♥♥

SIMP