I use my ♥♥♥♥ for home defense, just like the founding fathers intended. 4 ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" I say a I grab my phone and lotion. Blow my load all over the first man. He's dead on the spot. I start schlackin it all over the second man, but miss entirely because my ♥♥♥♥ is smooth bore, and the stray load impregnates the neighbor's husband. I'm forced to rely on the yaoi bara hentai I have on a table at the top of the stairs. "Tally ho, lads". The incoming tsunami smothers both men in the flood, and the sheer force starts setting off car alarms. Affix a condom and penetrate the last man. He leaves before the police arrive because he needs to recover from the soreness. Just as the founding fathers intended.

Nooo, that wasn't the point!!!!

TRUE, THE GAY ♥♥♥♥ IS THE BEEEEST

but the gay ♥♥♥♥ is the best PARRRRT

Fact: Futa porn can be made less gay than straight porn. You see, straight porn has one guy and one girl. Because you're jerking off to something with one guy in it, that's 50% gay. If you watch futa ♥♥♥♥ a girl, that's one girl and a half girl, thus only 25% gay. You could make it 0% gay with two girls but the problem is, that makes them lesbian, which wraps back to being 100% gay.

you think your life is hard?
try being stuffed with meat 24/7