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85 of 85 (100%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Spring Fresh

Clean any map adequately
Unlocked Nov 4, 2016 @ 5:59am

Employee of the Month

Get the Employee of the Month reward for your office
Unlocked Nov 25, 2016 @ 9:17am

You're Fired!

Get fired!
Unlocked Nov 22, 2016 @ 10:24am

Blood Soaked

Spill 100 dirty buckets
Unlocked May 10, 2018 @ 1:07pm

Blaze of Glory

Incinerate 2000 items
Unlocked May 11, 2018 @ 4:41am

Bloody Hell!

Mop up 10,000 splats
Unlocked Nov 25, 2016 @ 10:15am

Who's for Dinner?

Get eaten
Unlocked Nov 26, 2016 @ 12:44pm

Top Brass

Pick up 800 casings
Unlocked May 27, 2018 @ 9:56am

Taking Out the Trash

Pick up 1000 pieces of trash
Unlocked Aug 23, 2018 @ 10:21am

Ubermensch

Speedrun a map with at least %25 par time to spare
Unlocked Jul 22, 2018 @ 1:38pm

Pedestrian

Track over 20,000 footprints
Unlocked Jun 11, 2018 @ 12:36pm

Janicide

Blow up a fellow worker with the help of an ominously bright-red explosive charge
Unlocked Nov 26, 2016 @ 12:48pm

Need a Hand?

Receive a total of 35 helping hands from the Slosh-O-Matic
Unlocked Oct 28, 2018 @ 4:21am

Bins? Limbs!

Suffer the wrath of the Bin machine 75 times
Unlocked Oct 27, 2018 @ 12:47pm

First Aid

Restock a total of 50 medkits over your cleaning career by punching out of levels with medkits
Unlocked May 23, 2018 @ 9:01am

The Nose Knows

Use the Sniffer for a total of 2 hours
Unlocked May 17, 2018 @ 11:50am

Chew on This!

Throw 100 items into sand traps
Unlocked Dec 12, 2016 @ 8:58am

Disintegrator

Fry 500 items with the plasma welder
Unlocked Oct 27, 2018 @ 1:23pm

The Mops Of Wrath

Complete Athena's Wrath Level
Unlocked Nov 15, 2016 @ 9:44am

Anti-Virus

Complete Caduceus Level
Unlocked May 17, 2018 @ 12:04pm

Ice-Cold Cleana

Complete Cryogenesis Level
Unlocked May 25, 2018 @ 10:13am

Sandblasted

Complete Unearthly Excavation Level
Unlocked Dec 13, 2016 @ 11:33am

Pine Fresh

Complete Hydroponic Hell Level
Unlocked May 21, 2018 @ 1:45pm

Surgical Sweeper

Complete Evil Science Level
Unlocked May 23, 2018 @ 8:44am

Deep-Sea Dry-cleaning

Complete Paintenance Level
Unlocked Nov 25, 2016 @ 9:17am

Operation Brownwash

Complete Waste Disposal Level
Unlocked Nov 22, 2016 @ 9:43am

Refined

Complete Unrefinery Level
Unlocked May 10, 2018 @ 2:38pm

One Mop To Rule Them All

Complete All major Official Levels
Unlocked Jun 14, 2018 @ 12:52pm

Pass The Torch

Take a lit flare from a fellow Janitor
Unlocked Nov 22, 2016 @ 10:19am

Louis and Clean

Complete Gravity Drive Level
Unlocked Jun 6, 2018 @ 12:50pm

Big Banger Burnout

Tame the uncontrollable fury of the Big Banger by incinerating it
Unlocked Oct 30, 2016 @ 11:49am

Clean Freak

Cleanup your own personal Office by removing any Trash, Viscera and Blood; excluding trophies, then leave
Unlocked May 11, 2018 @ 12:31am

Employee of the Year

Receive 12 Employee of the Month awards
Unlocked May 25, 2018 @ 11:05am

Identity Theft

Steal 30 or more Personal Identification Devices (P.I.Ds) from cleaned levels and take them to your office
Unlocked May 23, 2018 @ 9:01am

Bring the Thunder

Take the Big Banger Supernova out of Unearthly Excavation and into another work-site and turn it on
Unlocked Jun 2, 2018 @ 12:07pm

Master of the Beats

Turn off the Big Banger while it's playing loudly(keep your music volume up too) in zero-gravity during a Solo game
Unlocked May 5, 2020 @ 4:02am

Plague Bearer

Transfer a Goo-Jar to another work-site and infect something
Unlocked May 17, 2018 @ 12:09pm

Head Hunter

Collect a head from each species in cleaned levels and take them to your office
Unlocked May 25, 2018 @ 10:13am

Brushed Steel

Complete Revolutionary Robotics Level
Unlocked Nov 12, 2016 @ 6:58am

Bushwhacked

Complete Overgrowth Level
Unlocked Jun 4, 2018 @ 11:28am

Bob's Legacy

Find Bob
Unlocked Jun 2, 2018 @ 11:16am

"Red Keycard"

Unlock Bob's super secret secret stash room
Unlocked Jun 2, 2018 @ 11:31am

Keep It Secret, Keep It Safe

Find all the unique and hidden collectibles and return them to your office
Unlocked Jun 6, 2018 @ 12:50pm

Eggregious

Find all the hidden painted eggs and return them to your office
Unlocked Jun 4, 2018 @ 11:28am

Lost in Space and Time

Get consumed by an inter-dimensional crack in space-time
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 10:41am

Wicked Unliving

Collect the chainsaw, boomstick, cursed hand and the evil book and return them to your office
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Thursday the 12th

Collect the mask and machete and return them to your office
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Bad Dreams on Helm Street

Collect the clawed glove and return it to your office
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Harroween

Collect the white mask and butcher knife and return them to your office
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

The Shimmering

Collect the axe and return it to your office
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Never Put It On

Collect the ring and return it to your office
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

House of Honor

Clean the entire House of Horror level
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:11pm

Back From Whence It Came

Destroy the Bad Banger
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 1:10pm

Not Quite a Lumberjack

Destroy 200 items in the woodchipper
Unlocked Oct 30, 2018 @ 12:24pm

Cleanliness is Godliness

Completely clean all mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked Oct 23, 2018 @ 2:04pm

Christmas Crisis Corrected

Completely clean Santa's Workshop without breaking any Christmas items and clock off
Unlocked Oct 23, 2018 @ 2:04pm

Sanitized Earth

Completely clean all mess and destroy every item in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked Oct 24, 2018 @ 1:52pm

Bloody Incompetent

Prove your incompetence by leaving a worse mess in Santa's Workshop and clock off
Unlocked Oct 21, 2018 @ 12:48pm

St. Nick's Boomstick

Collect Santa's shotgun and bring it back to your office
Unlocked Oct 24, 2018 @ 1:55pm

The Red Nose Knows

Collect the iconic reindeer nose and bring it back to your office
Unlocked Oct 23, 2018 @ 1:27pm

Rooks Kept

Collect the different Rooks Keep figurines and take them back to your office
Unlocked Oct 24, 2018 @ 1:55pm

Ballistic Weaponry

Collect the different Ballistic Weapons toys and bring them back to your office
Unlocked Oct 24, 2018 @ 2:04pm

Thunder Candle

Requisition a new replacement janitor through the use of TNT
Unlocked Oct 21, 2018 @ 12:34pm

Head Hunter

Collect elf heads and bring them back to your office, you freakin' psycho!
Unlocked Oct 24, 2018 @ 1:55pm

Santa Hats Must Die!

Incinerate 50 Santa hats, the symbol of everything you hate
Unlocked Oct 24, 2018 @ 3:24pm

Tower of Babel

Build a stack of 10 stools
Unlocked Oct 23, 2018 @ 2:18pm

The Day the Funk Died

Bring about the sad meeting of Ice-Cold Banger and fire
Unlocked Oct 23, 2018 @ 2:32pm

Cold Storage

Complete Frostbite Level
Unlocked May 9, 2018 @ 2:21pm

Biomassive Breakdown

Complete Incubation Emergency Level
Unlocked Jun 14, 2018 @ 12:52pm

Sanitary Supremacy

Completely clean the entire Shadow Warrior temple level
Unlocked Sep 11, 2018 @ 10:43am

Mr. Two Million Dollars

Collect the two million dollars of cold hard cash from the Shadow Warrior level all at once and bring it back to your office
Unlocked Oct 13, 2018 @ 10:19am

Swept Under The Carpet

Complete Uprinsing Level
Unlocked Jun 11, 2018 @ 2:49pm

Crystal Clear

Complete Core Sample Level
Unlocked May 5, 2020 @ 4:52am

Pest Control

Complete Pestilent Penitentiary Level
Unlocked May 3, 2020 @ 7:28am

Bleach and Clear

Complete Penumbra Level
Unlocked May 5, 2020 @ 7:49am

Audacious Oddities

Find all the unique Collectibles in the Vulcan Affair and return them to your office
Unlocked May 2, 2020 @ 4:57am

Lair Care

Clean the entire Vulcan Affair level
Unlocked May 2, 2020 @ 4:57am

Teeth for Tunes

Bring about the unfortunate meeting of Double-Oh Banger and Shark
Unlocked May 2, 2020 @ 4:32am

Blood in the Water

Go for a swim with Sharks
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 3:25am

We're Gonna Need a Bigger Tank

Feed the ever hungry Sharks 500 items they can either devour or destroy
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 5:49am

Double-Oh Dumbass

Foolishly activate the Death Ray
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 4:39am

Locked In

Lock another player inside a holding cell where they belong
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 3:29am

Death From Above

Get turned into mist by an orbital beam weapon
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 5:20am

Cat-astrophe

Using an orbital beam weapon, destroy the symbol of your most hated overlord; cats!
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 5:20am

Orbital Bang-bardment

Allow the Banger to ascend to its rightful place among the heavens through the use of an orbital beam weapon
Unlocked May 1, 2020 @ 5:22am