+rep

Every now and then, you hear tales of someone's huge girth.
I thought it was just fantasy, rumors, or made up stories, until I was driving home one day and hit a tree.
But when I flew out of my window and almost died, I looked up and noticed the tree had no branches or leaves.
That's when I realized, I drove into this man's huge dong.
Insurance wouldn't fix my car because they said anything struck by god's gift of a dong is a blessing and not an accident.
#godblesshishugedong

Truly the sexiest man alive. Scientists are still trying to measure the sheer magnitude of his greatness (and other impressive dimensions 👀). A living legend. A king. A gift to humanity. We are not worthy.

look man i get it times are tough

I understand that pornography is banned in your city, but that doesn't mean you have to jerk off to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Ancient Apparition while playing in VC with me I literally offered you a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ VPN three times so you can goon to the hub or whatever you like idk and you are like too autistic to accept a handout so I have to listen to you double stroke it to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ COLD FEET while we are trying to lane DUDE literally I wouldn't even mind if you just leveled your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ abilities properly I know cold feet is the most "sexy" spell but you can level the other ones too on my lane ♥♥♥♥ man dont play with me anymore until u pre-masturbated im sick of this ♥♥♥♥

Best player I've played with. Thanks for always carrying!

I thought earth was flat until I was walking downtown one day on my phone not looking. I hit a pole really hard and it woke me up. Then I realized I walked into this man's huge dong and not a pole light.
Thanks for having a huge dong and saving me