Oi ♥♥♥♥♥,
My name is Nigel, and I’m like knackered with every single one of you nutters, ya get me? All of you are limey, daft, buggers who spend every tick of their day looking at bloody stupid pho’os. You are like everyfing bad in the world, right? Honestly mates, have any of you ever gotten any gash? I mean, I guess it’s fun having a laugh at people cuz you’re a right prat yourselves, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than wanking to birds on facebook.

Don’t be a tosser. Just do me head in. I’m pretty much David Beckham. I was the skipper on the football team, and bowler on my cricket team. What sports do you play, other than “toss off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also got an A in maths, and have a right fit bird (She just gave me a jobby; ♥♥♥♥ was SO scrummy). You are all rubbish who should just kill yourselves. Cheers.