I am a 42 year old man, and this game changed my life. I was born with a health condition, which renders my long johnson completely useless (save for urinating, of course). My shlongus bongus has never had the joy of having an erection, and this caused major complications in my marriage. I would often request my wife to step on me and call me "mommy's good boy", due to the fact I could not satisfy her with my weak excuse of a richard.


All of this was fine and dandy, until the day my wife's boyfriend bought me a gaming pc, and my wife never wanted to step on me and degrade me in our relationship. A heavy bought of depression befell me. I trained myself to watch the most toe curling, succulent, creamiest of pornographic content; thus to no avail. I could never seem to get my member to harden.


I tried everything I could, I even delved into rule 34, and yet nothing could ever seem to get me going. My marriage was crumbling, my dreams of having children with my wife were shattered, death eventually seemed to become the only option in this cruel, calculating world.


I thought to myself, if there ever was a god or deity with plans for this world and the people who lived in it, a cruel one at that they were. My mental health spiralled to a low I never thought possible. I was more than ready to give up hope. Then, I browsed the steam store page, and came across this curious little game known as "Team Fortress 2". I had never seen a silly game as of yet, and thought the designs were rather cute.


I thought to myself, what the hell? A silly shooter game wouldn't hurt to try, right?


And try it I did.


Through vigorous gameplay, a plot filled with various twists and turns, rewarded by a beautiful soundtrack and visual art: Team Fortress 2 quickly became one of the most sublime games I had ever laid eyes upon. This game was not crafted by man, no mere mortal could ever achieve something as entrancing and wonderous as this.


This game helped me realise, I was gay.


I walked up to my wife's boyfriend, hardened like a rock, ready to roll.


We made sweet, passionate music all throughout the night, much to my wife's dismay and horror.


Nowadays, I live on a ranch with my husband. Thank you, funny shooter game. You have truly shown me the beauty to life.