Comments
Jun 12, 2018 @ 12:50pm 
Hello am 48 year man from somalia. Sorry for my bed england. I selled my wife for internet connection for play "conter strik" and i want to become the goodest player like you I play with 400 ping on brazil and i am global elite 2. pls no copy pasterio my story
Mar 18, 2018 @ 3:14pm 
▬|██████|▬This is Nudelholz.Copy Nudelholz in your Signatur to make better Kuchens and other Teigprodukte! Take it und hau it on the Kopp of a bekloppt Person to get you a better Gefühl than vorher!!!
Jan 28, 2018 @ 1:34pm 
Eat a ♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥
……………………………………….¸„„„„
…………………….…………...„--~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).'\
………….…………………… („-~~-„¸_….,/ì'Ì
…….…………………….¸„-^"¯( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸-¯"¯/'
……………………¸„„-^"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡'\¸„„,-"
**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡¸-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)„-^" : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡„-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ¸„-^¯
( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸„„-^¯
:.' : : '\ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)¸„„-~"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°):"-„""***/*'ì¸'¯
:.':( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡:"-„ ( ͡° ͜ʖ\
.( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Jul 4, 2017 @ 1:00pm 
10 Windows Gebote

1.Du sollst keinen Kaffee in die Tastatur schütten.
2.Du sollst nicht mit deinen Fettfingern auf den Bildschirm
tatschen.
3.Du sollst deine Festplatte regelmäßig aufräumen.
4.Du sollst immer dein Betriebssystem herunterfahren, bevor du den
Computer ausschaltest.
5.Du sollst die Highscore -Liste nicht manipulieren.
6.Du sollst nicht die Hälfte deiner Arbeitszeit Solitaire oder
Minesweeper spielen.
7.Du sollst nicht begehren deines Nächsten 19-Zoll-Monitor.
8.Du sollst deine Freunde nicht mit nichtssagenden E-Mails-
bombadieren.
9.Du sollst keine Götter neben Bill Gates haben.
10.Du sollst dich vor dem Apple der Versuchung hüten
Jul 4, 2017 @ 12:58pm 
We regret to inform you that your Credit Card titled "Dad's Visa" has been declinded, any of your latest purchases will not be processed due to suspicous activities. To unlock your card for further use, please confirm your recent purchases and total cost with your local bank.

The listing follows

- 1x Monster Horse Dildo (12') $89.99
- 1x Ultra HD Backdoor Sluts 9 $12.99
- 6x Magnum condoms (Small) $24.45
- 5x Bananas $7.00
- 5x Cucumbers $4.00
- 1x FeelsLikeBlood Lube Bottle 750ml $19.99
- 1x Next day shipping $45.00
- 1x Frequent Shopper Discount (15%)


Please respond back to us using your old email:
i_love_black_cock@hotmail.com.
Apr 18, 2017 @ 10:30am 
Er: "Du bist wie ein Eichhörnchen..."

Sie: "Awww so süß?😍😍"

Er: "Nur glücklich mit Eichel in der Fresse..."
Feb 27, 2017 @ 7:27am 
Δ~~Δ
ξ •ェ• ξ
ξ ~ ξ
ξ  ξ
ξ  ⌒~~~~~ 〇
ξ   ,     ξ
ξ ξξ ξ~~~ξ ξ
ξ_ξ ξ_ξ    ξ_ξ
Dat is Gerald
Er mag dich
Magst du ihn auch ?
Dann schick in weiter
Damit der mehr erleben darf.
<3
Nov 16, 2016 @ 10:55am 
ahahaha cheater nice
Oct 11, 2016 @ 11:37am 
//Approved
- 🆅🅰🅻🆅🅴
Sep 21, 2016 @ 12:18pm 
Maybe
Jul 22, 2016 @ 5:38am 
Error 404                      [-][口][×] |
 | ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄|
 | Windows has detected that your penis is small           |
 | Is this true?                          |
 |    ______    ______    _____   |
 |    |Yes     |   |maybe  |     |Yes     |    |
 |     ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄     ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄     ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄   |
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Jun 26, 2016 @ 8:36am 
-rep cheater
Jun 7, 2016 @ 12:41pm 
/フフ         ム`ヽ
/ ノ) ᴅᴏ ᴜ ᴇᴠᴇɴ ʀᴀɪsᴇ? ) ヽ
/ |  ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ⌒(ゝ._,ノ
/ ノ⌒7⌒ヽーく  \ /
丶_ ノ 。   ノ、 。|/
........`ヽ `ー-'_人`ーノ
..........丶  ̄ _人'彡\
.............\ 彡 _人彡l
..............\____B======================================================D
............./____/\____\
May 19, 2016 @ 7:23am 
+rep nice and fast slave
May 6, 2016 @ 2:23am 
██████ ]▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄
██ ♥███
█████████▅▄▃▂
Il███████████████████]
◥⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙◤
YOU HAVE BEEN VISITED BY THE 420TH GERMAN PANZER DIVISION. COPY AND PASTE THIS AUTISTIC ♥♥♥♥ IN THE COMMENTS OF 5 OTHER PROFILES OR YOUR HOUSE WILL BE SHELLED AT MIDNIGHT.
May 2, 2016 @ 10:49am 
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Apr 8, 2016 @ 10:33am 
.........∩___∩ YOU HAVE BEEN LEATHERCLUB BUTTSEXSED BY A PSYCHO RAPIST!
.....| ノ      ヽ../⌒)
... /⌒) (゚)   (゚) | .|     ▂ ▪ ▂▄▅▆▇■▀▀〓◣▬ ▪ ■ … .
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Apr 6, 2016 @ 11:04am 
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Kappa
Apr 5, 2016 @ 3:40am 
"Wie finden Sie Flüchtlinge?"
"Mit dem U-Boot"
"Nein, ich meinte, was halten Sie von Flüchtlingen?"
"Abstand!"
"Ich wollte wissen, wie sie Flüchtlingen gegenüber stehen?"
"Mit dem Gewehr im Anschlag."
"Nein verdammt, ich möchte wissen, was ihre Einstellung dazu ist?"
"Vollautomatisch und entsichert."
"-.-"🙈🙈
"Haben Sie etwas gegen Flüchlinge?"
"Ja! Pistolen, Maschinengewehre, Handgranaten...."
"Nein. Ich meine wie finden Sie Flüchtlinge?"
"Radar, Nachtsichtgerät..."
"Mein Gott! Machen Sie sich denn garnichts aus den armen Menschen?!"
"Doch natürlich.. Handtaschen, Portemonais, Stiefel.."
Apr 2, 2016 @ 3:56pm 
Roses are red

My name is not Dave

This makes no sense

Microwave
Mar 25, 2016 @ 2:19pm 
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░░███░▌▄█▌░░▀░░▀██░░▀██████▌You've been visited by autist loli-sama!
░░░▀█▌▀██▀░▄░░░░░░░░░███▐███ Send this dank meme to atleast 83 weeaboos,
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Mar 4, 2016 @ 11:11am 
STUDENT: Sir, can I ask a question?
TEACHER: Yes!
STUDENT: How do you put an
elephant inside a fridge?
TEACHER: I don't know.
STUDENT: It's easy, you just open
the fridge and put it in. I have
another question!
TEACHER: Ok, ask.
STUDENT: How to put a donkey
inside the fridge?
TEACHER: It's easy, you just open
the fridge and put it in.
STUDENT: No sir, You just open the
fridge take out the elephant and put
it in.
Mar 4, 2016 @ 11:11am 
TEACHER: Ooh...ok!!
STUDENT: Let me ask another one. If
all the animals went to the lion's
birthday party, and one animal went
missing which one would it be?
TEACHER: The lion of course!
Because it wud eat all the animals.
STUDENT: No sir, it is the donkey
becoz it's still inside the fridge.
TEACHER: Are you kidding me?
STUDENT: No sir, 1 last question.
TEACHER: Ok!
STUDENT: If there's a river full of
crocodiles and you wanted to cross,
how would you?
TEACHER: There's no way, I would
need a boat to cross.
STUDENT: No sir, you just swim and
cross it because all the
animals went to the lion's birthday
party.
Dec 28, 2015 @ 7:24pm 
ايامي التي اصبحة تبعد
عني الوحدة التي يمكن ان
تكون رفيقا لي في اي يوم
من الايام دامت بادن الله
صداقتي لكم ودامت
افراحكم
ومسراتكم واعيادكم و

Also wie besprochen....
sei pünktlich und denk an die Zünder
Dec 8, 2015 @ 11:43am 
▉▉▉▉▉▉◤┳◥▉▉▉▉▉▉ You have been visited by the Loomynarty.
▉▉▉▉▉◤┳┻┳◥▉▉▉▉▉
▉▉▉▉◤┳┻┳┻┳◥▉▉▉▉ Copy and paste this on the walls of the 5
▉▉▉◤┳━┳━┳━┳◥▉▉▉
▉▉◤┳┃┈( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)┈┃┳◥ ▉▉ most MLG m80s you know or you
▉◤┳┻╰━━━━━╯┻┳◥▉
◤┳┻┳┻┳┻┳┻┳┻┳┻┳◥ will be qu1cksc0p3d by #FaZe Clan
Oct 24, 2015 @ 6:06pm 
Was hat eine Nutte mit einem Bungee Sprung gemeinsam?

1. Beide Kosten 100 Euro
2. Beide haben einen kurzen Höhepunkt
3. Wenn das Gummi reißt hat man ein Problem

:D
Oct 23, 2015 @ 11:11am 
< ̄`ヽ、       / ̄>
 ゝ、  \ /⌒ヽ,ノ  /´
   ゝ、 `( ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) /
     >     ,ノ
     ∠_,,,/´”
Oct 18, 2015 @ 4:45am 
A wild asian ping pong match appeared
Q( -_-)____|__o__Q(-_- )
Oct 12, 2015 @ 12:57pm 
#_____________________$_____________________#
#____________________$$$____________________#
#__$_________________$$$________________$___#
#___$$______________$$$$$_____________$$____#
#____$$$____________$$$$$___________$$$_____#
#_____$$$$$_________$$$$$________$$$$$______#
#______$$$$$$$______$$$$$_____$$$$$$$_______#
#________$$$$$$$____$$$$$___$$$$$$$_________#
#___________$$$$$____$$$___$$$$$____________#
#__$$$$$$$______$$$__$$$__$$$______$$$$$$$__#
#______$$$$$$$$____( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )____$$$$$$$$______#
#__________$$$$$$$$$_$$$_$$$$$$$$$__________#
#_________________$$$_$_$$$_________________#
#_____________$$$$$___$___$$$$$_____________#
#_____________________$_____________________#
Oct 11, 2015 @ 12:06pm 
.................................♥
.............................♥
........................♥
...................♥.................................♥
........................♥........................♥.......♥
.............................♥...............♥...............♥
.................................♥.......♥.......................♥
♥...................................( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )..............................♥
....♥..........................♥.......♥
.........♥.................♥...............♥
..............♥.......♥........................♥
...................♥.................................♥
.................................................♥
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.........................................♥
.....................................♥
Aug 27, 2015 @ 2:14am 
    silver1
/フフ ▔▔▔▔▔▔▔ム`ヽ
/ ノ)          )ヽ         
/ |  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ノ⌒(ゝ._,ノ     
/ ノ⌒7⌒ヽーく  \ /    
丶_ ノ 。   ノ、 。|/             
   `ヽ `ー-'_人`ーノ         
    丶  ̄ _人'彡
Jul 12, 2015 @ 1:41pm 
. .∧_∧ 
..( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ) つ━☆・*。
⊂   ノ    ・゜+.
 しーJ   °。+ *´¨)
         .• ´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
          (¸.•´ (¸.•'* ☆