I'm straight but.

Man, I just wish I had a gay friend. We could chat, relax, kiss, have sex, engage in a casual no strings attached relationship, eventually develop emotional bonds, start to date like normal people, watch all the corny movies, eventually we'll get a dog and a cat, I'll propose, small spring wedding (because we don't want to make a fuss), buy a nice house by the National Park, adopt two children, send them to a nice school, one learns violin, the other learns the drums, we go to the lake for the holidays every single year, eventually the older of the two children begins to lose interest in our yearly trips to the lake, asks to not go one year,

I refuse but my husband changes my mind, teenager gets drunk at a friends party, the rest of the family returns from holiday and sees teenager drunk and crying, does inspirational parenting speech with countless examples of me making horrible mistakes, hugs, both children graduate Highschool, one studies music (violin), the other studies business, husband and I retire, we both move to a small cottage with a large back yard, take up gardening as a hobby, I feint one day and collapse in the garden, goes to emergency room, diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, two months to live, every day husband visits, we watch all the corny movies together, we go on a final trip to the lake, return to the hospice nearing the end, I lay down holding my husbands hand, final breath leaves my body with love on my mind, love for you. Wait, what?

~OwO~ nuzzles you Okay gwuys, hwere it gwoes. I dwidn't wanna sway it ~OwO~ bwut ~OwO~ it's twoo wate. I'M gwonna do it.

Everyone is nuzzle gway. nuzzle Even gwirls. It's ~OwO~ nuzzle dwisgusting l, and hweres why.

Men cwan be attracted to ~OwO~ women. nuzzle Women cwan be attracted to mwen. Women cwan nuzzle be ~OwO~ attracted to women. Mwen cwan nuzzle be attracted ~OwO~ to nuzzle mwen.

Men who wike women are nuzzle gway bwecause women wike ~OwO~ mwen. So ~OwO~ thwat mweans you wike a pwerson nuzzle thwat wikes pulls out meat scepter other mwen. ~OwO~ Thwat my nuzzle fwellow ~OwO~ gways, is GWAY.

Kwissing a woman? nuzzle GWAY. GWAY ~OwO~ AS nuzzle SHWIT SWON. Chwances are, mwost women hwave kwissed a mwan. When you kwiss ~OwO~ a nuzzle woman, you are bwasically kwissing a mwan. Cwan you bwelieve thwat? ~OwO~ You nuzzle jwust ~OwO~ mwade out with a gwuy and a ~OwO~ gwirl, bwoth nuzzle of which ~OwO~ are ~OwO~ GWAY. ~OwO~ So nwow, you're gway. Thwe swame ~OwO~ wogic gwoes nuzzle fwor every swexuality, and my fwellow gways, thwis is ~OwO~ only cwommon ~OwO~ swense.

Only gwamers nuzzle cwan be nuzzle stwaight. Gwod ~OwO~ nuzzle bwess thwe nuzzle gwamers!

Rawr! xDD did I 💀💀💀scare you?? I hope I didn't 🙈🙈 B/c RAWAR mean "I love u!" In 🐲🐲 DINOSAUR‼ xDDD 🎧🎼🎤 send dis msg to 🔟 of ur most emo friendz! 🎀💊💉🔫🔪💉 If you get 🔟 or more back, you will be visited by
🔮DAHVIE VANITY🔮 fr0m 👊🏻👊🏻💉 BOTDF! 💉💉💉👊🏻👊🏻 N him n Garret Ecstasy 💊💊💊 (The newest vocal for BOTDF... ♥♥♥♥ YAH XD) will take you on a shopping spree to HOT TOPIC 😍🎀🎧☠ If u dnt send diz to at least ✋🏻 pplz, you will be kicked out the mall and you will also be
🚨BANNED🚨 from ALL Hot Topics! 😢😭😱😨 so remember to send 2️⃣ all ur friends! (/-^) n remember, MUSIC IS LYFE 🎤🎧🎤🎧 IN WIT A BULLET 🔫🔫 OUT WIT HEARTS 💕💕💕 xDDD RAWR! (that mean "I love u" in dinosaur) 🐲

I bet this guy dies in R.E.P.O a lot