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19 of 58 (33%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements

Rap Sheet: Trespasser

Find Fred's basement workshop
Unlocked Nov 27, 2016 @ 10:21am

Rap Sheet: Yegg

Open the safe
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 2:22pm

Rap Sheet: Thief

Pick up 15 things that don't belong to you
Unlocked Nov 27, 2016 @ 11:13am

Rap Sheet: Kleptomaniac

Pick up 30 things that don't belong to you
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 2:14pm

Only Hoagie Can Make a Tree

Create a cherry tree
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:12pm

Only George Can Destroy a Tree

Destroy a cherry tree
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:14pm

Windsock it to Me

Change the flag
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:42pm

Obvious, Really...

Make it rain
Unlocked Nov 27, 2016 @ 11:04am

Not Raised in a Barn

Close a door
Unlocked Nov 27, 2016 @ 11:01am


Climb through the chimney with all three kids
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:30pm

Costume Quest

Clothe Laverne in the costume
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:48pm

Chateau Eau Neaux

Make vinegar
Unlocked Dec 23, 2020 @ 2:15pm

Of Course It Would Still Weigh the Same

Get a tiny sweater
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:33pm

Dude, It's Like, Cannibalism

Hoagie eats a Hoagie
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 2:47pm

Games History Major

Play Maniac Mansion
Unlocked Nov 27, 2016 @ 11:26am

That Joke Never Gets Old

Squirt five different people with disappearing ink
Unlocked Dec 23, 2020 @ 2:15pm

And Then the Universe Explodes

Try to mix the decaf and caffeinated coffees
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 1:59pm

That Only Works With Alligators

Try to flush the hamster
Unlocked Dec 23, 2020 @ 1:52pm

Voiding the Warranty

Try to put something metal in the microwave
Unlocked Dec 19, 2020 @ 3:34pm


Get all other achievements in the game

Number One

Power Hoagie's Chron-o-John

Number Two

Power Laverne's Chron-o-John


Acquire a diamond

Yesterday's News

Defeat Purple Tentacle yesterday

Mental Patience

Play the whole game without skipping a cutscene

33 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked