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I know. But still, ain't no one around in my experience who can fill that void. Port reports, first impressions and rambling critiques don't come in a single package anywhere that I've looked.
No offense to Joe but his approach to critique is entirely different.
But basically his "review" was half an hour of plagiarizing Kotaku's "review" while autistically screaming fuckonami while spouting bullshit about having to pay for save slots, attacking the combat and gameplay without actually playing, and generally have no clue how the game works as a whole. Jim Sterling's review was equally egregious spouting off the exact same bullshit while obviously having only put in the most bare amount of time into the game to just get a handful of shots around the starting zone.
Overall the problem is while the game isn't perfect by any stretch they could've found legitimate issues to attack the game for. But instead their reviews were a combination of outright lies or completely skewing facts to the point it may as well had been outright lies.
Honestly the only review I'm aware of by anyone with any real audience is Yahtzee's review of it. Not a glowing review but tackled the real issues the game had. Had TB been kicking about and doing reviews when it released I think the game would've done a whole lot better given you can expect him to do a legitimate indepth review that isn't completely bullshitting you blinded by bias.