Is My Brother Even a Gamer?

[Narwhal]

I just need to rant to someone. I got into an argument with my brother about him not playing video games with me anymore. He plays Overwatch and World of Warcraft, with the games on his Steam library, like Garry's Mod and Halo: MCC going untouched for months. We used to play on the original Xbox together when young, games like Unreal Championship, Crash Nitro Kart and Burnout. Now he doesn't give a ♥♥♥♥ about any games I buy for him . I feel like I've lost the relationship we had as kids. This is less about him "being a gamer" and just venting about the fact he won't change.

I've unfriended him on Steam and Discord now.

[Aachen]

Are you buying this person games they’re actually interested in?

[Narwhal]

Originally posted by Aachen:

Are you buying this person games they’re actually interested in?

I'm trying to buy games that have something in common with games he already likes or voiced his interest in. He expressed interest in Borderlands 3, so I offered to buy him Borderlands 2 because he hadn't played it before, and since I already owned it we could co-op the campaign together before playing 3. He said no. Because he liked Overwatch, I suggested he try TF2 with some friends since it's free to play. Still no. I bought him Doom because he liked FPS games and enjoyed Diablo 3. He opened the game, but didn't try it all because he couldn't get it to display on his main monitor, only his secondary. Has not tried to actually play the game since. I've asked him about other games like Left 4 Dead 2, No Man's Sky, Skyrim, and if I should buy Halo MCC to see if anything peaks his interest but he still just enjoys the same two games.

[Louwxck]

then maybe it's better if you just leave it be and find new friends

[Aachen]

Well, if you ask and the interest is not there .... not a whole lot you can do.

If Borderlands Three is of interest, but Two isn’t, your tenable route may be to save up for a couple copies of that.

[unca.alby]

Don't rant here, won't do you any good. Have a serious, friendly talk with your brother. NO JUDGEMENT. Tell him how you feel about things.

Maybe things will go well and maybe he'll come back to some of the stuff you like, or maybe you can try some of the stuff he likes, and maybe you'll like those. Or, maybe you can just agree to disagree, and still be good brothers and good friends.

And when all is said and done, that's the important thing, that you remain good brothers and good friends. You don't have to do everything together to be good brothers and good friends.

[Zaskar]

Originally posted by unca.alby:

Don't rant here, won't do you any good. Have a serious, friendly talk with your brother. NO JUDGEMENT. Tell him how you feel about things.

Maybe things will go well and maybe he'll come back to some of the stuff you like, or maybe you can try some of the stuff he likes, and maybe you'll like those. Or, maybe you can just agree to disagree, and still be good brothers and good friends.

And when all is said and done, that's the important thing, that you remain good brothers and good friends. You don't have to do everything together to be good brothers and good friends.

I completely agree with this.

[Aachen]

It’s quite sage.

[Sanguine]

He plays what he likes to play.

[feytharn]

Originally posted by Yeet:

I just need to rant to someone. I got into an argument with my brother about him not playing video games with me anymore. He plays Overwatch and World of Warcraft, with the games on his Steam library, like Garry's Mod and Halo: MCC going untouched for months. We used to play on the original Xbox together when young, games like Unreal Championship, Crash Nitro Kart and Burnout. Now he doesn't give a ♥♥♥♥ about any games I buy for him . I feel like I've lost the relationship we had as kids. This is less about him "being a gamer" and just venting about the fact he won't change.

I've unfriended him on Steam and Discord now.

Actually, you are ranting about the fact that he did change. The one who doesn't change seems to be you. Mind you, I don't judge that, but to deal with your changing relationship you should take that into account.

[Kargor]

He did change. You just expect hm to like the same games you do, which appears to be not the case.

[Crazy Tiger]

Also keep in mind that just because you are brothers, doesn't mean you stay close eternally. You *can* grow apart, just like any other humans.

To me it sounds like he simply has found games he really likes to play. You can try and force him to play whatever you want to play.

That said, why don't you start playing Overwatch and WoW with him?

[Quint the Alligator Snapper]

Originally posted by Yeet:

Is My Brother Even a Gamer?

He plays Overwatch and World of Warcraft, with the games on his Steam library, like Garry's Mod and Halo: MCC going untouched for months.

Yes, he's a gamer.

Originally posted by Yeet:

We used to play on the original Xbox together when young, games like Unreal Championship, Crash Nitro Kart and Burnout. Now he doesn't give a ♥♥♥♥ about any games I buy for him . I feel like I've lost the relationship we had as kids. This is less about him "being a gamer" and just venting about the fact he won't change.

I think you mean "the fact he did change and now he doesn't play games you like anymore".

I do feel a bit bad that I have yet to play Civilization V and Torchlight II, two games that this one friend of mine bought for me years ago, and Child of Light, which another friend bought for me years ago (though it requires Uplay), and Dragon Age, which yet another friend bought for me years ago (and which I did play for a bit but not beyond the prologue). But I just get around to my games differently.

Originally posted by Yeet:

Because he liked Overwatch, I suggested he try TF2 with some friends since it's free to play. Still no.

The two games have somewhat similar concepts but they're still different enough that I would still expect there to be a learning curve involved.

[Simon ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.com]

Originally posted by Kargor:

He did change. You just expect hm to like the same games you do, which appears to be not the case.

bb

[Dadpool]

You did not "lost" relationship, nobody "posseses" the relationship, he is not your possesion and you could respect his own road because people are not an objects.

If you feel unhappy because of his own life choices that do not harm you in any way(no, ignoring is not an abuse), I would suggest isolating yourself from people that do not share your vision of "other people make me happy and I can't be happy alone" because you might get hurt by your own point of view.

[nullable]

OP you seem to think your brother owes you something. Nobody owes you play time in games you want to play. Buying people games you want play doesn't put them on the hook. People grow and change, sometimes people grow apart. You can't stop it. And getting upset you're not central enough in your brother's life might not be rational, even if people can empathize with your feelings.