What do you guys think about socializing?

[FighterSoldier]

Socializing is hard if you ask me...

[MEGA MAN]

Originally posted by FighterSoldier:

Originally posted by Velo:

No one can punch you, or hit you, or do bad physical stuff to you online. No one can kick you out of a house. No one's in danger. Your free of all the bad things that can happen. Though people try to bring more real life into the online all the time.

Before you know it, disagreeing with someone online might be a crime. Or watching the wrong youtube video.

True that. Unfortunately humans are very dangerous to each other and what's happening all around the world I honestly don't blame people who become antisocial or asocial.

true imo! T-T"

[FighterSoldier]

Originally posted by Kiddiec͕̤̱͋̿͑͠at 🃏:

Originally posted by FighterSoldier:

What do you guys think about socializing?
Socializing is hard if you ask me...

It gets a lot easier when you avoid conversing with people who act antisocially (in direct opposition to the cooperative principle) rather than trying to cooperate, negotiate with, and please everyone.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJEaMtNN_dM

Someone who simply does not follow the rules that Tom put forth in the video but does not act in opposition to them is asocial, not antisocial (there's a difference). To be antisocial, you have to actually be acting against social and cooperative principles - not just abstaining from them or being shy.

:sans: Now that said, there's uhh... kind of a lot of antisocial people, who don't listen, who engage in lots of prejudicial assumptions, and who really like swinging those accusations, and sometimes their weapons around... uhhh... makes it kind of difficult to uhhh... socialize or even function in society, even when you're trying to either filter to only people who are not antisocial or even to just do your job as someone who takes out the trash.

Do you have any idea what it's like trying to stay positive and keep customers positive when you work at a pizza place or a theater and someone says awful things about it and then someone comes and shoots up the place with bullets? ...or maybe the situation won't be that dire and an old woman will just throw her dirty underwear into the fryer instead.
You never know what's going to happen while taking someone's order!
...and that's when they initiate contact with you, not the other way around.

Only a fool would say that the problem is entirely on you when you struggle to socialize while these kinds of problems exist in society.

Without a strong network of people consistently and reliably recommending trustworthy people who know how to cooperate and treat others with dignity, then socializing inherently requires interacting with strangers who could act with hostility or even go full crazy on you without any prior indication that they would do so.

Oh yeah people do mistake antisocial and asocial people for sure.

And yeah there's so many problems with people that I honestly don't blame people who avoid socializing altogether. There is so many bad people and it's really sad.

[FighterSoldier]

Originally posted by Kestrel:

Originally posted by FighterSoldier:

IRL people can be toxic too though, and I always wonder whether people are more honest in the internet or in real life.

While that's true, it's usually more toned down because in many social spaces people know there's consequences to saying stuff. It's not like online where it's anonymous so it actually affects their reputation too.

I'm actually going to make the argument that people are not less or more "honest" in real life or the internet. They are merely more impulsive on the internet. The internet is a place that's hard for someone to take seriously, in-between reality and complete fiction. To see words or a disembodied voice as a whole, living human is difficult; therefore I think there's almost always a sort of dehumanization towards internet strangers that does not occur in real life.

The internet is often a thought experiment for many people; it's where they dump their thoughts and ideas that they generally wouldn't entertain IRL. Like a little testing ground. They don't sincerely believe in what they say most of the time. You'd never see them say it IRL. It's its own little universe.

People are not more honest, they're just more inclined to show the passing thoughts and feelings they have that they wouldn't have shared in real life. And many of these aren't "real," I think. A lot of it is just to be funny, or to instigate an argument, or to otherwise entertain/stimulate themselves (trolling for example). So there's quite a bit of lying even in these "honest" moments that people cite so much.

People are already pretty honest in real life once you get to know them. I mean, the people being racist on the internet are just a little bit more withdrawn about in real life, that's all. But once you get to know them and they get comfortable, they'll be open about it.

In some ways people are more "open" online but that doesn't translate to being more "honest." People don't really lie in real life as much as they (reasonably) withhold parts of themselves until they can trust the other party more.

So to put it short, in the internet it's like people are already comfortable saying what they want to say, whereas in real life they need to know people before they're comfortable saying what they want to say?

[Li77lehorn]

I don't like to socialise in a group(extremely rare I do it). It tends to make me go quiet. But I like one on one type of socialising because it seems more real and you can talk deeper about things. So for me three is a crowd, mostly.

And with socialising on the internet, I've never really done it unless you count this place and this post. (depends on what you class as socialising)