Girls acting cold after a few dates

[.happybutcher.]

I hope someone can give me some insight on this because it's been bothering me a lot lately.

So this one girl I've been dating for a month now. She messaged me first, I noticed she's interested and asked her out on a date. We had a good time, the the second date comes, the third and about 10 days after the fourth date she completely stops messaging me. When I message her the replies are short and bland. It feels like messaging me is a burden to her. I'm not that annoying clingy guy that messages her every morning wishing her all the best but it still ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hurts. On our dates we always had a good time, lots of laughing, touching. When I last dropped her off we were making out in my car for like half an hour. She told me she's been waiting for this for months (she noticed me in April last year and wanted to message me then, but we only started dating in December after she replied to my ig story). Yeah I also stopped messaging her because it hurts.

I guess my question is why would she act so interested in me then all of a sudden become cold and distant.
My plan is to not message her anymore , but if she messages me first I'll gladly continue with this.

[Not Big Surprise]

Originally posted by swole:

Originally posted by Neurotic Panda:

coming to steam OT for advice, let alone relationship advice.

lol. GL. Thats like asking a politician to give an honest answer.

:lunar2019crylaughingpig:

I would definitely not take a relationship advice from you.



Bit of an update: she did message me last night, and we have another date planned for the next weekend.

nice :3

good luck!

[AlienTestosterone]

Just tell your broads to quit playing little games or move on find another.

[ナルゴ]

She gave you a shot. That short window of time was your opportunity to impress or prove compatibility.
You've already been dumped, you just don't know it yet.

[【ボス B o s s】]

Originally posted by swole:

I guess my question is why would she act so interested in me then all of a sudden become cold and distant.

https://youtu.be/pC3w5hXzekQ
You're welcome, no need to thank me.

[76561198832263061]

Originally posted by swole:

I hope someone can give me some insight on this because it's been bothering me a lot lately.

So this one girl I've been dating for a month now. She messaged me first, I noticed she's interested and asked her out on a date. We had a good time, the the second date comes, the third and about 10 days after the fourth date she completely stops messaging me. When I message her the replies are short and bland. It feels like messaging me is a burden to her. I'm not that annoying clingy guy that messages her every morning wishing her all the best but it still ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hurts. On our dates we always had a good time, lots of laughing, touching. When I last dropped her off we were making out in my car for like half an hour. She told me she's been waiting for this for months (she noticed me in April last year and wanted to message me then, but we only started dating in December after she replied to my ig story). Yeah I also stopped messaging her because it hurts.

I guess my question is why would she act so interested in me then all of a sudden become cold and distant.
My plan is to not message her anymore , but if she messages me first I'll gladly continue with this.

"Don't try to understand women, women understand women and they hate each other." – Al Bundy

[Candyy]

Originally posted by Axe:

I say get a Scalextric. They're great at any age :-)

Huh, that is a name of a toy boomers and gen X used to grow up with (at least on my country v:) 🤔

[⍚MagusFromHeaven⍚]

heat them up

[Heraclius Caesar]

Could be that she's busy with life and work/school and maybe something happened or something going on that she doesn't want to put on you that might push you away even though the way she's acting seems to be doing that already.

Entirely possible that she has another dude that she's got a long term complicated thing with and she just hooked up with you a few times to live out a fantasy a little bit or to get back at her other dude.

Maybe she's the type that likes to play mind games with guys and test them.

Could be she's playing the field and has you in rotation with a few other dudes, it does kind of sound like she's putting you on the back burner and giving her attentions and energy to 1 of her other studs.

You also have to understand that she may have just changed her mind and decided she doesn't want to pursue something with you for whatever reason. Women are notoriously fickle, mercurial creatures after all.

Anything is possible. If I were you though and she had actually said some of the pretty serious things that you say she said and if you really like her then put your cards on the table, and if that doesn't change anything and she's still cold and distant just keep it pushin, if she's not your dream girl there's no reason to get hung up on 1 woman who wants to abruptly start acting different and cold to you.

[76561198832263061]

Women are overrated anyway

[$2 Hero]

Not even Socrates knows these things.

[Watermelon {JESUS IS LORD}]

Originally posted by swole:

I hope someone can give me some insight on this because it's been bothering me a lot lately.

So this one girl I've been dating for a month now. She messaged me first, I noticed she's interested and asked her out on a date. We had a good time, the the second date comes, the third and about 10 days after the fourth date she completely stops messaging me. When I message her the replies are short and bland. It feels like messaging me is a burden to her. I'm not that annoying clingy guy that messages her every morning wishing her all the best but it still ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hurts. On our dates we always had a good time, lots of laughing, touching. When I last dropped her off we were making out in my car for like half an hour. She told me she's been waiting for this for months (she noticed me in April last year and wanted to message me then, but we only started dating in December after she replied to my ig story). Yeah I also stopped messaging her because it hurts.

I guess my question is why would she act so interested in me then all of a sudden become cold and distant.
My plan is to not message her anymore , but if she messages me first I'll gladly continue with this.

so give em a sweater like a man

[.happybutcher.]

Originally posted by Nargo:

She gave you a shot. That short window of time was your opportunity to impress or prove compatibility.
You've already been dumped, you just don't know it yet.

We had another date after this post so all is good still!

[De Hollandse Ezel]

you are a man.
if you make 2 identical profiles on a dating site without photo.

same age.. same education same interest .. identical..

and you do NOTHING with those profiles...
you will notice the female one will have over 1000 messages after a month on that datingsite
and that male one ZERO.

sure you MAY hope for that one woman who will come after YOU.. but unless you are a millionaire, and have stellar looks.. and are famous.. you chances of that happening are basicly zero..

so as a man.. YOU must take the iniative.. and yes thats hard..
society wants you to be a gentleman :

never show interest/flirt/message more than 1 girl at the same time even before any contact has been made..
but if you do that.. you end up alone.. tossing out a wide net, to see who bites is what all man do and so must you to beat the competition.
-> however be found OUT you bet on more than 1 horse at the same time.. and your chances are gone..
-> basicly it's a delicate skil to stay open.. but at the same time respectfull..

likewise..
society teaches you you must give a woman space, don't be pushy.
-but if you do that you again will stay alone.. woman want to be woed.. and that means winning her over even WHEN she sais no/ shows no interest.
**if you don't you won't get anywhere you be wasting months waiting on ones that are not interested while you could have invested that time in one that IS..

ofcourse you must not come over as either desperate.. or as a posessing creep.. while also keep the pressure on her so you ither progress in getting closer to a relation or cut it off..

finally you must protect yourself while being a gentleman.
woman can be golddighgers and walk all over you..
**not opening your emptions NOR your wallet to soon in a new contact, is a wise advise.
you not want to get hurt.. and you not want a woman to profit of you that is no realistic prospect for a friend or a relationship.
-> but being TO closed or stingy.. will also turn off those that WOULD be good wifes or friends.

it's a skill of balance..

the fact us man can think clearer.. is the one advantage we have.. we can make lists like what characters would fit well with us.. and make up tests.. for her .. that her responces betray if she proceeds or not.
-we are led by our ratio.. even if we are emotional.. woman are always led by their emotion even if rational.
-> this we can exploit, or better said use to NOT be exploited.

[De Hollandse Ezel]

so OP if I read you.. you have a girl who you got passed the friendzone with recently...
who even admitted she waited since april for that to happen..
yet now you complain she is acting cold?

dude.. newsflash : you are to passive.
a girl like that wants you to take iniative.
don't take her lack of responding as lack of interest.. she want to be chased. MUCH stronger than you do now, YES do call her 50 times.. instead of 1 message and wait a week for a responce..
if you are unconfortable by being that dominant
she aint the one for you.

[Here]

Originally posted by De Hollandse Ezel:

woman are always led by their emotion even if rational.

uhhhhhhhhh