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翻訳の問題を報告
Who fears going to sleep and painlessly dying in sleep?
I personally have laid down a couple times where the way my body was acting, I did not expect to get back up. But, everything dies, everything burns. And theres little you can do about it. Clearly, if there is a god, they don't give a darn about anyone. If there is a jesus, they can't even be bothered to cure anyone of anything.
Theres little logical reason to believe theres anything after this. That we are anything but unimportant creatures that exist via total rng.
I've had an NDE so I don't fear or feel uncomfortable around death anymore, which is the most common outcome for survivors. You may have similar experiences if you spend time around dying relatives or in an ICU environment. the dying process is (usually) nowhere as terrifying as we expect. It's surprisingly comfortable, as evidenced by the huge storm of hormones your brain releases to get you to chill out during the process.
I hope nobody reading this ever experiences this firsthand, but sometimes, living is a far worse outcome. death can be a very welcome gift. I'm not necessarily looking forward to it, since I have so many goals I'd like to fulfill, but my fear has been replaced by a curiosity. it's the final mystery and that's pretty exciting :)
Got to the point where I was in a walking coma. Amnesiac, weighed less than half my normal body weight, mind collapsing in on itself. My skin had gone grey. Could barely think. I knew I was on my way out.
They finally got me on insulin. While I'm not as bad as I was, I have damage to my heart, brain, oesophagus and probably quite a few other things, ongoing memory problems, which means life quality is not so good and then other bad things have continued to happen.
But, I should have died in 2016 and it's nearly ten years later. Every day I'm still here is a blessing. I don't know whether I'm afraid of death. I'd certainly prefer not to die, but I also know that diabetes is degenerative, no matter how good your control, it affects you. Mine is not good, and I've been to the end of that road already. But so far I've been lucky, still have all my limbs and digits, eyes and kidneys. So I suppose it will come down to how much pain I can keep going through when and if those do go.
I do know something about what it is like to die though. Physically at least. I have gone through hundreds of hypos. Which is when your blood sugar is so low it's not able to power your cells. So they start to shut down. This starts to happen literally seconds after their glucose supply is shut off. This includes oxygen as they use that for the chemical reactions. Most diabetics avoid this at all cost but I'm used to it now. It becomes difficult to think, difficult to stand, walk or balance, operate limbs or make decisions. You lose control of your muscles because they have no power. If your muscles go before you've been able to stop whatever the exact problem is - blood sugar/oxygen/blood loss, you've had it if you're on your own. As your blood sugar drops, you become cold because your body heat is literally from cells 'burning' glucose. At this point, most people will lose consciousness, but I've never had that happen, even when I've dropped to levels where I really should have. But it can come with a really bad headache. I'm just very stubborn I guess. But this is the sort of thing that will happen to anyone if they bleed out or lose oxygen or blood sugar or heart attack or so on. Anything blood related. Your mind will probably start to do funny things, like hallucinate or be unable to connect thoughts. It's not pleasant. If you're not intending to die, you have to be really single minded and focused on the solution, which in my case is - eating a biscuit or three. Your body will really want to fight it though. All the cells in your body seizing up simultaneously isn't exactly painful, but you'll certainly be aware of a sensation of it happening. You'll certainly become aware of how you're a sum of your parts.
So that's how a good portion of us will go. Honestly, if you're gonna die, do it in your sleep.
thousands of exploding suns in my brain with ink
Thank u