Tell me a joke that makes me laugh and I'll give you a copy of HL2

[76561197963519852]

I'll wait for a couple replies before choosing* the winner

[Xero_Daxter]

How do you know when someone is vegan?

Don't worry. They will tell you.

[Affronter]

I'm pretty sure every one owns HL2

[↑↑↓↓←→←→BASelect]

Publicado originalmente por Breathe:

What is an hl2?

https://store.steampowered.com/app/220/HalfLife_2/

[Nikole Pain]

A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s office says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?”

The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?”

And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on.”

[76561197963519852]

Publicado originalmente por Niko Pain:

A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s office says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?”

The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?”

And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on.”

I did not laugh.

[L1qu1dator]

Publicado originalmente por Breathe:

What is an hl2?

[Nikole Pain]

Publicado originalmente por redacted:

Publicado originalmente por Niko Pain:

A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s office says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?”

The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?”

And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on.”

I did not laugh.

dont worry its difficult to convey this joke through text, also I already have 100% half life 2, GOOD LUCK TO ALL THE OTHERS!!!

[HarleyIsntReal]

So this guy walks into a bar, and he says to the bartender "Can I get a free drink if I show you something amazing?" Bartender says sure, and the guy pulls out this box and a small man about 12 inches tall comes out and starts playing a piano. Guy gets his free drink and the bartender says, "I'll give you another one if you tell me where you got that." so the guy tells him around the back alley there's a genie granting wishes. So the bartender gets him a drink and goes to the alley. Well, suddenly there's a ruckus in the bar and a million ducks from flooding in. Bartender comes back to the guy and says "You didn't tell me that the genie was half deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks." and the guy replies "You think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"

[76561197963519852]

Publicado originalmente por GageTheSpartan:

So this guy walks into a bar, and he says to the bartender "Can I get a free drink if I show you something amazing?" Bartender says sure, and the guy pulls out this box and a small man about 12 inches tall comes out and starts playing a piano. Guy gets his free drink and the bartender says, "I'll give you another one if you tell me where you got that." so the guy tells him around the back alley there's a genie granting wishes. So the bartender gets him a drink and goes to the alley. Well, suddenly there's a ruckus in the bar and a million ducks from flooding in. Bartender comes back to the guy and says "You didn't tell me that the genie was half deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks." and the guy replies "You think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"

lol, not bad.

[Watermelon {JESUS IS LORD}]

Publicado originalmente por redacted:

I'll wait for a couple replies before choosing* the winner

pete and repeat were on a boat
pete fell out
who was left

cant go wrong with the classics