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Yew Nough Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:29am
Emotional Baggage
I was reading a book that described it as something that 'stops' you as a person.

Like you've developed feelings or beliefs in response to something, but that something had disappeared a long time ago..and you now find yourself in a new situation still feeling and believing these 'things'.

(And these 'things' make you feel out of place everywhere you go, because they never reflect the current moment.)

Is this accurate?
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Originally posted by Triple G:
Originally posted by Yew Nough:
Is this accurate?
Usually i hear about it when it´s about relationships. So You´re not really over the relationship, even if it´s (long) gone. If used as a general baggage, as combination of everything You ever experienced in life - it´s rarely used. Perhaps to describe that everyone has it´s faults, but the saying goes that everybody has his baggage to carry, without the focus on "emotional".

But with it it´s more like people trying to start a new relationship, but always compare the new person with the former one, or tells stories about them, or something like it.

That would be the same as the "red flag" statement before.

I´m unsure what it has to do with pseudo-psychology or excuse for accountability. But perhaps it´s used differently in English. Because You say "everywhere You go" - so i´m unsure in which other cases it would have severe effect. But it´s annoying for a new partner, or a potential new partner, to hear such stories about a past relationship, which is more than one would talk about these things usually, as one "should" be focused on a "new" life, and a new future with another partner.

If it´s more than that, or You can´t overcome it even if You try - i would probably suggest professional help. But imho the easiest way to overcome a past relationship is to start a new one. But then again i´m not really the "emotional baggage" guy, as i need a day or two to get over something and then the past is the past and i look forward.
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Showing 1-15 of 18 comments
Your_White_Knight Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:32am 
Originally posted by Yew Nough:
Emotional Baggage

I was reading a book that described it as something that 'stops' you as a person.

Like you've developed feelings or beliefs in response to something, but that something had disappeared a long time ago..and you now find yourself in a new situation still feeling and believing these 'things'.

(And these 'things' make you feel out of place everywhere you go, because they never reflect the current moment.)

Is this accurate?

Sounds like a lot of pseudo psychology... something to blame and make excuses for...
#1
xAlphaStarOmegax Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:33am 
For me, I've always believed in God and the Bible. I've also believed in some conspiracy theories for years now, so it's not baggage for me.
#2
Yew Nough Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:38am 
Originally posted by Your_White_Knight:
Sounds like a lot of pseudo psychology... something to blame and make excuses for...
What would you describe as emotional baggage?
#3
Your_White_Knight Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:44am 
Originally posted by Yew Nough:
Originally posted by Your_White_Knight:
Sounds like a lot of pseudo psychology... something to blame and make excuses for...
What would you describe as emotional baggage?

I just did...
#4
Yew Nough Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:48am 
Originally posted by Your_White_Knight:
Originally posted by Yew Nough:
What would you describe as emotional baggage?

I just did...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transference

Found the term for it, I'm all set :mhwgood:
#5
skOsH♥ Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:53am 
Everyone has it

The goal, is to try to forget about it. Easier said than done, in some cases
#6
Fake Jul 20, 2023 @ 11:33am 
Emotional Baggage = Excuse to avoid Accountability
#7
Vinz Clortho Jul 20, 2023 @ 11:39am 
Three characteristics of all experienced phenomena:

1. Constantly changing
2. Never feel fully & completely satisfying
3. Are not the experiencer
Last edited by Vinz Clortho; Jul 20, 2023 @ 11:39am
#8
40000Aggro Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:11pm 
No idea.
#9
Kris Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:17pm 
Originally posted by Your_White_Knight:
Sounds like a lot of pseudo psychology... something to blame and make excuses for...

People defend or make excuses for emotional baggage? First I've heard of this. I've always seen it labeled as a "red flag" when someone enters any kind of relationship with it. Due to the toxicity that can result from baggage or trauma, I see very few people with the patience for it.
#10
Your_White_Knight Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:20pm 
Originally posted by Ditto:
Originally posted by Your_White_Knight:
Sounds like a lot of pseudo psychology... something to blame and make excuses for...

People defend or make excuses for emotional baggage? First I've heard of this. I've always seen it labeled as a "red flag" when someone enters any kind of relationship with it. Due to the toxicity that can result from baggage or trauma, I see very few people with the patience for it.

This:

Originally posted by Fake:
Emotional Baggage = Excuse to avoid Accountability
#11
Ghost Robertson Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:21pm 
Originally posted by xAlphaStarOmegax:
For me, I've always believed in God and the Bible. I've also believed in some conspiracy theories for years now, so it's not baggage for me.

I feel I'm quite honest with that, I have absolutely no idea if God is real or if anything in the bible is real. I just go about my life normally and if something like the rapture happens then that's ok too.
#12
Slim Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:23pm 
Emotional baggage is literally just negativity that you've experienced and held onto. Others here are confusing this with how someone manages their baggage.
#13
Kris Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:28pm 
Originally posted by Slim:
Emotional baggage is literally just negativity that you've experienced and held onto. Others here are confusing this with how someone manages their baggage.

Fair point.
#14
Your_White_Knight Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:35pm 
Originally posted by Slim:
Emotional baggage is literally just negativity that you've experienced and held onto. Others here are confusing this with how someone manages their baggage.

No...

Because that's just believing "everyone has it"... that's not some anchor "everyone" carries around guiding what they do in life... "manage(ing)" their "baggage" or not"...

Some of us don't claim "emotional baggage" because we don't have it... some of us move on because that's the mentally healthy thing to do and we don't need it to excuse our actions
Last edited by Your_White_Knight; Jul 20, 2023 @ 7:36pm
#15
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Date Posted: Jul 20, 2023 @ 10:29am
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