Do you have social anxiety?

ᑓᑌᑎᕬ Jun 28, 2023 @ 2:08pm

No. I just prefer to have no interaction with people who either don't conform with my way of life or have a diametrically opposing lifestyle to mine.

#1

Candyy Jun 28, 2023 @ 2:12pm

Well, nowadays not so much ,therapy helped me A LOT on this one

#2

saranacX Jun 28, 2023 @ 2:16pm

No. In my life I think I've caused more anxiety than I've gotten.

#3

kingjames488 Jun 28, 2023 @ 2:22pm

ya, they really wanted to diagnose me with that so they gaslighted me until I had it.

#4

Azza ☠ Jun 28, 2023 @ 2:43pm

A pet, specially a dog, can help a lot with social anxiety.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eW5gYTuHjd4

Mostly it comes down to focusing on other stuff and just not overthinking things. Forget the "what if" scenarios and care less about whatever the outcome might be. On a daily basis add a little to step outside your own comfort zone, but slowly over time, bit by bit.

You know how you feel everyone is judging you? Well, you are your own worst judge and most others could care less, rather worrying more about their own stuff. Consider how much you judge others, it's probably not as much as you assumed.

As for talking, learn open-ended questions (requiring a sentence to response an answer), rather than using closed-ended questions all the time (yes/no or single word responses). Google search those terms. You will find others enjoy talking about themselves, a lot. You don't actually need to be great at talking to others, rather just be a good listener and response with open-ended questions. It will keep the chat going with ease.

Last edited by Azza ☠; Jun 28, 2023 @ 2:45pm

#5

kingjames488 Jun 28, 2023 @ 3:24pm

Originally posted by Azza ☠:
Mostly it comes down to focusing on other stuff and just not overthinking things. Forget the "what if" scenarios

ok, then you go do something "stupid" and people be like "think before you do things!!"

constantly think about EVERYTHING!!
like the height of your pants...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VVi45OU0Tk

#6

Candyy Jun 28, 2023 @ 3:36pm

Originally posted by Azza ☠:
A pet, specially a dog, can help a lot with social anxiety.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eW5gYTuHjd4

Mostly it comes down to focusing on other stuff and just not overthinking things. Forget the "what if" scenarios and care less about whatever the outcome might be. On a daily basis add a little to step outside your own comfort zone, but slowly over time, bit by bit.

You know how you feel everyone is judging you? Well, you are your own worst judge and most others could care less, rather worrying more about their own stuff. Consider how much you judge others, it's probably not as much as you assumed.

As for talking, learn open-ended questions (requiring a sentence to response an answer), rather than using closed-ended questions all the time (yes/no or single word responses). Google search those terms. You will find others enjoy talking about themselves, a lot. You don't actually need to be great at talking to others, rather just be a good listener and response with open-ended questions. It will keep the chat going with ease.

Cat help too

#7

GlaceonChireiden Jun 28, 2023 @ 3:37pm

Not as much as I used to. Having to interact with strangers all day through work actually helps a surprising amount.

#8

kbiz Jun 28, 2023 @ 3:47pm

Originally posted by JustSomeLego:
Not as much as I used to. Having to interact with strangers all day through work actually helps a surprising amount.

Ironically, the best way to feel more comfortable in public is to be in public.

What do you fear, OP? Can you give us some more color?

#9

Azza ☠ Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:26pm

Originally posted by kingjames488:
Originally posted by Azza ☠:
Mostly it comes down to focusing on other stuff and just not overthinking things. Forget the "what if" scenarios
ok, then you go do something "stupid" and people be like "think before you do things!!"

constantly think about EVERYTHING!!
like the height of your pants...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VVi45OU0Tk

I should clarify what I meant by that...

Most people think "what if" a person doesn't like me, if I say hi and talk to them. They are willing to risk being rejected for not trying at all and never even finding out. Like asking someone you like out on a date but too afraid to even try because what if they reject you, so you let that someone go off out of your life to never know you had even existed.

The trick there is to care less about the "what if" negative scenarios you had created in your own mindset and just try anyways no matter the outcome. If rejected, try again with someone else, rinse and repeat.

You can plan stuff and events all you like, but don't expect them to flow that way. Rather stack probability to your favour and then release it to go with the flow.

If you never try something = nothing occurs. Yet if you went outside daily to go take your dog for a walk, probability stacks you might cross paths with someone else. If you never say hi = nothing occurs. Yet if you appear friendly and say hi, with perhaps an open-ended question related to what they are doing, probability stacks that they will reply back.

Last edited by Azza ☠; Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:27pm

#10

kingjames488 Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:30pm

Originally posted by Azza ☠:
Originally posted by kingjames488:
ok, then you go do something "stupid" and people be like "think before you do things!!"

constantly think about EVERYTHING!!
like the height of your pants...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VVi45OU0Tk

I should clarify what I meant by that...

Most people think "what if" a person doesn't like me, if I say hi and talk to them. They are willing to risk being rejected for not trying at all and never even finding out. Like asking someone you like out on a date but too afraid to even try because what if they reject you, so you let that someone go off out of your life to never know you had even existed.

The trick there is to care less about the "what if" negative scenarios you had created in your own mindset and just try anyways no matter the outcome. If rejected, try again with someone else, rinse and repeat.

You can plan stuff and events all you like, but don't expect them to flow that way. Rather stack probability to your favour and then release it to go with the flow.

If you never try something = nothing occurs. Yet if you went outside daily to go take your dog for a walk, probability stacks you might cross paths with someone else. If you never say hi = nothing occurs. Yet if you appear friendly and say hi, with perhaps an open-ended question related to what they are doing, probability stacks that they will reply back.

how can I think about if some specific person doesn't like me when I'm so busy thinking about the height of my pants?!

if you don't do anything, nothing goes wrong.

#11

SMIFFY Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:34pm

Soul crushing

#12

Azza ☠ Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:40pm

Originally posted by kingjames488:
Originally posted by Azza ☠:

I should clarify what I meant by that...

Most people think "what if" a person doesn't like me, if I say hi and talk to them. They are willing to risk being rejected for not trying at all and never even finding out. Like asking someone you like out on a date but too afraid to even try because what if they reject you, so you let that someone go off out of your life to never know you had even existed.

The trick there is to care less about the "what if" negative scenarios you had created in your own mindset and just try anyways no matter the outcome. If rejected, try again with someone else, rinse and repeat.

You can plan stuff and events all you like, but don't expect them to flow that way. Rather stack probability to your favour and then release it to go with the flow.

If you never try something = nothing occurs. Yet if you went outside daily to go take your dog for a walk, probability stacks you might cross paths with someone else. If you never say hi = nothing occurs. Yet if you appear friendly and say hi, with perhaps an open-ended question related to what they are doing, probability stacks that they will reply back.
how can I think about if some specific person doesn't like me when I'm so busy thinking about the height of my pants?!

if you don't do anything, nothing goes wrong.

If you don't do anything, nothing goes right either...

It's like what do you really have to lose?

Don't be afraid to fail. Be more afraid in not trying at all. As you won't learn from mistakes, develop and improve upon yourself. Rather just remain stuck as the same.

If you are really that afraid of failure, why do you even play video games. Setup with challenges and a way to fail. It's actually what the brain craves and drives for. The only difference is you keep trying the same level over if you lose against it, learning from the mistake to improve upon next time.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”

#13

Jonathan Sensei Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:43pm

Less social anxiety and more gynophobia. Not as bad as when I was younger, but still.

#14

kingjames488 Jun 28, 2023 @ 4:44pm

Originally posted by Azza ☠:
Originally posted by kingjames488:
how can I think about if some specific person doesn't like me when I'm so busy thinking about the height of my pants?!

if you don't do anything, nothing goes wrong.

If you don't do anything, nothing goes right either...

It's like what do you really have to lose?

Don't be afraid to fail. Be more afraid in not trying at all. As you won't learn from mistakes, develop and improve upon yourself. Rather just remain stuck as the same.

If you are really that afraid of failure, why do you even play video games. Setup with challenges and a way to fail. It's actually what the brain craves and drives for. The only difference is you keep trying the same level over if you lose against it, learning from the mistake to improve upon next time.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”

I haven't upgraded my PC and it's been "going right" for like a decade...

I'm not "afraid of failure", I know my limits and what's worth my time and effort to actually do rather than simply thinking of an idea and jumping into it without knowing any of the details and getting in over my head.

you say "oh go do this and that" but why? what does that gain me? also without defining what this or that may be it makes it super easy for you to just be like "oh well you might get to be on the price is right and steve harvey will rub his mustache on you"... but we don't KNOW that will happen... much less that I'd get a mustache rub if it did >.>

#15

Report this post