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Gets me everytime
was playing online grand theft automobile when hit fellow video gamer car with my car. i exit auto mobile and attempt trading of insurance information when I am hit by pistol bullet. fellow gamer goes into my vehicular and driver car. I am to look inside of his vehicular transportation when i cannot find vehicle registration under his name. call local police officer but he is not help, he is say racism things at me (i am a white in real but I enjoy roleplay as africa). so if anyone sees car license 7EDT417 please use telephone and call me
I am trained in religious warfare, and I'm the top knight in the Pope's army. You are nothing to me but just another heathen. I will wipe you the ♥♥♥♥ out with religious fury the likes of which has never been seen before in this Holy Land, mark my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ deus vult.
You think you can get away with saying that ♥♥♥♥ to me over carrier pigeons? Think again, infidel. As we speak I am contacting my secret Order of crusaders across the Holy Land and Jerusalem is being conquered right now so you better prepare for the saving of Jerusalem, heretic. The saving that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your faith. You're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dead, squire. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over DCC ways, and that's just with my sword sheathed.
Not only am I extensively trained in religious combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Christian army, and I will use it to its fullest extent to wipe your miserable asinus off the face of the Eastern Mediterranean, you little stercore. If only you could have known what holy retribution your little "clever" religion was about to bring down on you, maybe you would have converted to Christianity.
But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ heathen. I will enact holy fury all over you and you will drown in it.
You're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dead, heretic.
Thanks
“Omg hai ___^ I’m anon-san and I absolutely luuuv __ anime <3 and my fav is naurto!!! Okies so anyways, im going to tell you about the BEST day of my life when I met my hot husband sasuke!! <333333333 OMFGZ HE WAS SOOOOO FREAKIN KAWAII IN PERSON!!! Supa kawaii desu!!!!!!!! ___________________________________
When I walked onto Tokyo street =____=I looked up and saw…SASUKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333!!!! “ KONNICHIWA OMGZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ SUPA SUPA SUPA KAWAII SASUKE-SAMA!!!!!” I yelled n____n then he turned chibi then un-chibi!! he looked at me [O.O;;;;;;;;;;;] and then he saw how hot I am ___
he grabbed my hand and winked ~^ then pulled me behind a pocky shop o_o and started to kiss me!!!!!! [OMG!!! HIS TOUNGE TASTED LIKE RAMEN!!! RLY!! >.> <.< >.< (O) (O) (O)] then I saw some baka fat ♥♥♥♥♥ watching us and I could tell she was undressing him with her eyes!!!!!!! [ -__________-;;;;; OMG I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT EITHER!!! (ò_ó) (ò_ó) (ò_ó)] so I yelled “UH UH BAKA NEKO THAT’S MY MAN WHY DON’T YOU GO HOOK UP WITH NARUTO CAUSE SASUKE-SAMA LOVES ME!!! (ò_ó)” then sasuke held me close =^= and said he would only ever love me and kissed me again!!!!!!! ** (O)/ then we went to his apartment and banged all night long and made 42 babies and they all became ninjas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nyaaaaa!!! (^___<) ^______________;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;”
forgive english, i am Russia.
i come to study clothing and fashion at American university. i am here little time and i am very hard stress. i am gay also and this very difficult for me, i am very religion person. i never act to be gay with other men before. but after i am in america 6 weeks i am my friend together he is gay also. He was show me American fashion and then we are kiss.
wWe sex together. I never before now am tell my mother about gay because i am very shame. As i fock this American boy it is very good to me but also i am feel so guilty. I feel extreme guilty as I begin orgasm. I feel so guilty that I pick up my telephone and call Mother in Russia. I awaken her. It too late for stopping so I am ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ sex. I am very upset and guilty and crying, so I yell her, "I AM ♥♥♥ FROM SEX" (in Russia). She say what? I say "I AM ♥♥♥ FROM SEX" and she say you boy, do not marry American girl, and I say "NO I AM ♥♥♥ FROM SEX WITH MAN, I AM IN ASS, I ♥♥♥ IN ASS" and my mother very angry me. She not get scared though.
I hang up phone and am very embarrass. My friend also he is very embarrass. I am guilt and feel very stupid. I wonder, why do I gay with man? But I continue because when it spurt it feel very good in American ass.
No one was paying attention in the crossroads of New York as I was giving my speech.
"M-m-mine..."
However, one person was intrigued in what I was saying.
"M-m-m-minecraft..."
Then it was just a domino effect, ten more people are watching.
"Minecraft..."
A hundred were now watching, this had caught the attention of even the busy drivers in rush hour. Their faces in anticipation, some were even scared. Others were complaining that this isn't the real deal.
"MINECRAFT..."
But they all suddenly started cheering, shaking, praying. When they heard my tone, my pitch, my timbre.... they all knew what was going to come next. They realized... that salvation of the human race has finally come.
"Minecraft good Fortnite bad"
And then the silence broke
"OOOIOIIUUUUUGHHHhJJHHHHHWAASEAAAa//::"
Thousands of people fell to their knees, yelling orgasmically. People starting crying tears of joy, others were running and thanking God, News reporters were already on the scene, broadcasting the entire thing nationwide and consequently the entire world. Hundreds of people came out of their cars, buses, taxis, stores, and subway stations hooting and hollering. It was a miracle unfolding.
I started to say the next sentence relayed to me by our Lord and Savior.
"M-m-mi... Mine..."
Already some people fainted at just the mere sound of my voice. Even more people came. Some were jumping from planes thousands of feet in the air, others ran or swam miles to here in mere seconds. I think I even spotted a few famous people.
"MINE..."
Nearly a million people were here now. There's now Europeans, Canadians, Mexicans, Latin Americans, West Coasters, Africans, and even several Asians and one Australian. They were screaming hysterically, bringing gifts for me, taking pictures and videos. Fireworks and confetti everywhere, helicopters, and even Donald Trump was here with his family bowing down to me.
"MINEC-C-C-CRAFT voice crack"
A billion people were here now. Even animals from all over the world were coming in herds. I could see Pewdiepie &amp;amp;amp; Martiza, Elon Musk, Keanu Reeves, Lil Nas X, 50 Cent, Oprah Winfrey, the Kardashians, and so many other people. Many people were having seizures, heart attacks, and strokes from the sheer excitement, and some were being trampled to death because of the huge crowd. The screaming was deafening. Some just came straight out of their bathroom, school, work, or their parenting... but it doesn't matter now.
"MMMMMMIIIIINNNNEEECRAAAFTTTTT"
No matter what was your race, gender, ethnicity, sexuality, religion, economic class, etc... it didn't matter. All of humanity has come together for this one moment. Millions of people have died to due plane crashes, car crashes, doctors abandoning their patients, parents abandoning their children... just to be here, but it will all be worth it.
Nearly half of humanity is here now. Even the dead came out their graves for this. Everyone is climbing on top of each other and on the walls of skyscrapers since they couldn't fit. So many lights, music, dancing, feasts... yet barely a minute passed. Humanity is very interesting.
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...
I look at the smiling faces of the crowd in front of me. I look at the death and destruction that came from sacrifice to attend this event. This is it. We're ready.
0.
"Minecraft good Fortnite bad Instagram normie Emojis bad Keanu breathtaking Wholesome 100 [Everyone liked that] Area 51 PETA bad 69 nice 420"
"AaAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAyyyYYYYYYYYYYYyaYayaYaASyAAaYaaYayaAAAaaUGgGHHhHHhhHHhhHHh😩😩👅👄👀🥵🥵mmmmMMMMmMmMMMMMMMMM😭🤯😱😂🤣😍🤪💦hhhhhhHhFFFfffF"
Billions of people around the world disintegrated into their pure chemical compounds that composed their bodies, then their atoms, then their protons/neutrons/electrons, and finally their quarks... as they heard that holy sentence. The distant echoes of yelling can heard from thousands of miles. This... this was their ultimate purpose in life. This is the culmination of everything that has happened in human history, it is reason why life even existed in the first place. They weren't screaming in terror, they were shouting in orgasmic joy. They could finally die happy. Their entire lives flashed before their eyes as they saw their loved ones. They saw their ultimate fantasy. They can finally be freed from their imperfect bodies in this imperfect world.
The Sun blinked out. The Moon crashed into the Earth. The Earth turned into dust. The Solar System collapsed into a state of entropy. The Milky Way hosts a firework show of supernovas. All the galaxies of the universe colliding with one another. Reality is falling apart. That's because reality doesn't need to exist anymore. It has reached its goal. Spacetime has fallen. Matter ceases to exist. Not even the concept of nothing exists. The universe was never born.
Humanity is gone. Everything is gone. We are now one. Evil doesn't exist anymore. Insecurities don't exist anymore. Fear, sadness, anger don't exist anymore. Just hope, love, and harmony for eternity. This is what we were meant to be. This is our final evolution stage.
This is heaven. This is what it means to be happy.
Congratulations.