Went on a date with a girl and she brought her friend. I like the other one more. What now?

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slovenc95 Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:29pm

So, today I went on a lets say date and she brought her friend with her. We were chatting a bit and I noticed that I connected to the other girl more and she's cuter but I don't look at the appearance so much so that doesn't matter.
The girl I went on the date was more or less quiet while the other girl was quite cheerful and she was more communicative. The thing is I'd like to go on a date with her but they are very close so what should I do?

Thanks

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Showing 1-7 of 7 comments

Jonathan Sensei Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:34pm

If this was a first date, then it's understandable if your date was being quiet. Not everyone is just going to open up to someone else right away. Regardless, if you really feel a stronger emotional connection to her friend, then just be honest and explain this to her.

slovenc95 Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:41pm

Originally posted by Coffinmaw:
If this was a first date, then it's understandable if your date was being quiet. Not everyone is just going to open up to someone else right away. Regardless, if you really feel a stronger emotional connection to her friend, then just be honest and explain this to her.

Thank you for your reply! I do understand that it is natural to be a bit nervous or quiet the first time but yeah, I still fell more connected to the other one. The thing is I feel kinda bad about it and telling her friend that I like her more would just make the girl that I went on a date feel bad which I don't wanna do that. Except if I try to tell her that if she would keep it private.

Jonathan Sensei Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:43pm

Originally posted by slovenc95:
Originally posted by Coffinmaw:
If this was a first date, then it's understandable if your date was being quiet. Not everyone is just going to open up to someone else right away. Regardless, if you really feel a stronger emotional connection to her friend, then just be honest and explain this to her.

Thank you for your reply! I do understand that it is natural to be a bit nervous or quiet the first time but yeah, I still fell more connected to the other one. The thing is I feel kinda bad about it and telling her friend that I like her more would just make the girl that I went on a date feel bad which I don't wanna do that. Except if I try to tell her that if she would keep it private.

It's better in the long run to be honest about things like this. Sure, it sucks to have to tell a person that likes you that you don't share their feelings, but if they're mature about it they will understand even if it hurts them.

Vince ✟ Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:47pm

Her friend was more open and connected because you weren't her date. It's the best way to meet people, through friends. No scandal needed, just hit on her and ask her out. If they are normal they'll shrug it off and you'll be good. If not, they'll not let you split up their friendship because they are such besties they can't handle it.

Either way you are good, tell her.

C4Warr10r Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:51pm

Learn the lesson. People who are open and talkative tend to be more attractive than the quiet ones. Peronsality counts. So work on your discipline, it builds character.

That said, don't even think about going after her. Not now, and probably not any time soon. Only two outcomes await that decision. The first is that both Chatty Kathy and Silent Sarah hate you. If they're good friends, they will, and I get the sense they are because the quiet one brought her pal along for emotional support.

The second is that this other chick actually dates you, because she doesn't mind throwing her friends under the bus. You do not want a woman like that. Turst me, I've met them before and they all turned out to be dodged bullets.

Focus on the one who actually went out with you, work on your communication skills to get her to open up. If you two don't work out, you don't work out, no harm no foul. You can make a clean break, and if her friend still likes you without turning out to be a mega-b****h that's a divorce waiting to happen, she'll love you all the more for your sincere effort.

Treat your girl well. And I almost forgot something. If the chatty one makes a move while you're going out, really stay the hell away from her. It's the same as throwing her friend under the bus.

Last edited by C4Warr10r; Apr 12, 2017 @ 1:54pm