How Do You Reset Controller/Arcade Stick Calibration?

[Kokurou]

TL:DR My Razer Panthera works 100%, buttons, joystick, all fine.
My Qanba Crystal however, buttons work, joystick doesn't. It's stuck in a down-forward position when I plug it in to my PC, calibrating does NOTHING.

How do I reset it?
Don't tell me "unplug controllers" and everything else, I did all that, checked for driver updates, installed new ones, uninstalled new ones reinstalled, the whole bit. NOTHING. WORKS. I just want to reset calibration for the Qanba Crystal and unlike the Razer Panthera, there's no firmware anywhere online for it. The Panthera has a firmware update online, Crystal does not.