Add a personal note when we decline a friend request

[Jeanne d'Arc]

I tried to use the search, but I haven't found a similar suggestion. Is there one?

The recommendation:
- Give us an option to reject (decline/ignore) a friend request with a reason. We could write a message to the user who sent the friend request:
"I don't accept you because I don't know you."
"I don't accept you because I only want to keep my irl friends on my list."

Sorry for the primive examples above.

The point is that certain people (not bots) try to add me repeatedly (~every week), and I can't give them a polite reason. I don't want to accept them just to send a message to them, it would be so rude. (I would throw words at them and delete them quickly.. :( ). I prefer not blocking anyone. So, currently my most friendly approach is that I leave the friend requests in the wait queue (then they can't resend it). It would be nice to have an option to give them a short, polite reply. So they would move on, without any bad feelings.

Thank you, sorry once again if a similar suggestion already exists somewhere.

[Wolf Knight]

if they are sending a friend request every week, it will not matter if you tell them to stop it, they will keep sending one every week. some of those requests are most likely from bots, being polite will not stop them nor will being rude hurt their "feelings".

having the system send an automated message "Your friend request was rejected/denied/turned down/refused/etc" would be just as effective. you dont need to send a customized message nor a reason for rejecting an invite you didnt ask for. some people find it rude to send an invite without asking if its ok.

[ElvisDeadly]

You are worrying too much about this.

If the same people are sending you friend requests repeatedly and you do not want to be friends they are the ones being rude.

Originally posted by Jeanne d'Arc:

So they would move on, without any bad feelings.

Would they? It doesn't sound like they have got the message from being declined repeatedly.

Is it not easier to just Block them?

[Jeanne d'Arc]

ElvisDeadly, no.. :( blocking would cause further bad feelings to the both of us. I mean, I would also feel bad to block an innocent user. They did nothing bad for me. I just prefer a short friend list of trusted friends. And I wouldn't want to accept someone just because they saw me in a game or read my comments on the Forums.

[ElvisDeadly]

Originally posted by Jeanne d'Arc:

ElvisDeadly, no.. :( blocking would cause further bad feelings to the both of us. I mean, I would also feel bad to block an innocent user. They did nothing bad for me. I just prefer a short friend list of trusted friends. And I wouldn't want to accept someone just because they saw me in a game or read my comments on the Forums.

I understand that, I wouldn't block someone just because they sent me a friend request and i didn't want to accept. It's a bit extreme

But you did say this,

Originally posted by Jeanne d'Arc:

The point is that certain people (not bots) try to add me repeatedly (~every week), .

Unless I misunderstand you are saying that even though you keep denying the request THE SAME users are sending you friend requests over and over again. In that circumstance I would say it borders on harassment and a block is probably the only way they will stop.

[Gwarsbane]

If you don't want them on your friends list and they keep sending you invites and you know for sure they are human, block them. Thats harassment. So report them or block them or both.

They are not going to listen to some message you send back to them asking them to stop trying to add you if they didn't get the message already that you don't want to be their friend by declining them over and over again.


If their profile comments are open leave a message to them that way to leave you alone. If not block away, its rude of them trying to keep adding you after you very obviously don't want want to add them.

[Jeanne d'Arc]

Originally posted by ElvisDeadly:

Unless I misunderstand you are saying that even though you keep denying the request THE SAME users are sending you friend requests over and over again. In that circumstance I would say it borders on harassment and a block is probably the only way they will stop.

You didn't misunderstand me. :) It was my first approach to deny the requests. But I saw they (she or he) didn't want to give up. So finally, I just didn't touch the request and left it in the wait queue..

I have some friends who do the same thing and they say the friend requests stay in the queue after months. So I don't know if there is even a timeout..

I just thought it would be simple to write a sentence: "Thank you but I don't want to be friends. I know what you want but I am not the right person to play CS GO with because I don't even play CS GO and I see that's the only game you have. Sorry."

So I would give some meaningful (but not openly rude) answer. If I do nothing, they never get answers about why the friend request is not accepted. I don't consider a simple friend request to be harassment. Because there is no communication. I would just want to be polite / friendly.

So I thought maybe my suggestion / idea could help users who have a similar attitude.

[ElvisDeadly]

Originally posted by Jeanne d'Arc:

I just thought it would be simple to write a sentence: "Thank you but I don't want to be friends. I know what you want but I am not the right person to play CS GO with because I don't even play CS GO and I see that's the only game you have. Sorry."

So I would give some meaningful (but not openly rude) answer. If I do nothing, they never get answers about why the friend request is not accepted. I don't consider a simple friend request to be harassment. Because there is no communication. I would just want to be polite / friendly.

So I thought maybe my suggestion / idea could help users who have a similar attitude.

I see nothing wrong with the suggestion / idea in itself.

I just don't see a polite note having any effect in the situation you described, but you never know i guess

[jamesglen7]

The best thing about a good friend is trust. You can trust a good friend to pull you thru when life fails around you. Having nobody to speak to you, your best friend fills the void giving you a life.