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So i would recommend letting the download run without any interruption, even overnight.
THAT is definitely not normal. And it did happen two times to you?
Did you check if the files are still there when that happens ( in the install folder of the game) so Steam just does not recognize them or did they disappear too?
As with so many other people complaining that Steam randomly uninstalls/deletes their games, I can safely assure you that Steam does not randomly delete stuff.
Chances are that you have a problem with your system corrupting/loosing files. For example, it can happen if the system crashes or is turned off without proper shutdown.
IIRC, Steam also has a support article suggesting that some external disks might randomly disconnect, causing similar problems where Steam can no longer access the game.