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You can be romantically involved with both NPCs, but this requires that you build favor with both characters as you progress through their individual quest lines (by consistently saying the 'right' things during your dialogues with them - saying the 'wrong' thing and it can/will cost you favor).
Ultimately however, you'll be required to choose which character you want to 'go all the way' with. You can't do so with both of them (this is my understanding based on what I've read - I haven't finished my initial play through yet).
As for the mod option you asked about, I really don't know if one exists.
Yes.
Yes. At some point one character will ask you what the other character is for you. You can either say that the other character is a friend to you, which will lock the other character out, or you can say that you aren't sure, which will lock the character asking out of romancing them.
Btw, a romance is not guaranteed. The character you want to romance has to like you a lot.
You'd need a mod for that but i'm not sure if such a mod exists or if it even can exist based on the amount and kind of changes needed to make that work.
Yeah, i didn't want to spoil it, but since you googled it yourself: Yes, the romance option (none or one of the two characters) is heavily woven into the main story line. That's why i'm not sure if a mod enabling romancing both characters at the same time can even exist.