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This is a nice option too. Prior to this update I used "ghost mode" whenever I was in an "impossible" situation. This update has a "world modifier" that has a similar effect ... you can toggle "passive enemies" and they won't react to you unless you pick a fight.
It will probably be a few more weeks before the update goes live. It's been working great for me but there are always "risks" running a beta version. Might be worth considering.
https://steamcommunity.com/ogg/892970/announcements/detail/6662560248440866811
As far as getting your gear right now, the answers lie above as others have stated your only real options. Dev commands is what me and my buddies use if its a critical loss, but that comes with the dark temptation to abuse them if your not careful and can sour a run.
Playing solo isnt as bad since the gear and mats are not spread so thin, and writing off your loss could be less stressful if your situation allows.
I recently died faraway from home on the coast of a swap area wearing fully upgraded iron gear. I put maybe 40 hours of my life into acquiring that gear and 1 hour of real-life travel time to that spot. I can't get the gear back because Mr. 2-star Draugr and his friends won't move. What I do in such situations is ask a friend to come into my game world and help me retrieve that gear. If you have someone you know playing Valheim, ask for help, it's much easier with 2 guys.
For the future, always make the enemy come to you. Don't run up to where they are standing, definitely not with spawn piles. Use your bow to get their attention when you need to clear them. They don't camp your grave on purpose, you just happened to die in their living room. Do that and they will go back to patrolling and you will have a better shot at getting your stuff back later.
I can help get your gear. Just tell me where you at and how far?
When every thing calms down turn auto gather back on.
This^^^^.
What @Zep Tepi said IS true. If you come naked and have the inventory space it's just a "hit-and-run" in one click ... you click on the tombstone and get an "Items Recovered" message and keep on running.
But if you load up with food or a spare set of armor/weapons etc., or you pick stuff on your way there, you may not have the inventory space to take everything. Even "stacking" is sometimes quirky. The inventory opening means it couldn't find enough empty slots so it's giving you the option to choose what to pick up and what to leave. "Take All" will take what it can. If it can find enough slots and stack items, the tombstone disappears and the inventory closes. If not, it takes what it can and then sits there with the remaining inventory open while you get hammered.