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I learned to eventually not hit guards or followers. I use a short, non-enchanted weapon in towns or close quarters.
Unfortunately, the perk (Companion's Insight) is just for followers.
Personally, I use this:
http://www.nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/23614/?
It doesn't address the issue directly, but it does let me ignore the street battles in the knowledge that no one who won't respawn is at risk.
That tends to happen a lot. :D
When in the middle of a sudden melee, like a vampire attack, I will draw weapon and backpedal a few steps to see the whole picture before I start swinging. I rely upon guards to be my meatshields while I determine the next course of action.