So confused... Why the hate?

[NobilityLove27]

So can someone set the record straight for me? I'm a straight woman who is as excited and hyped to play this game as much as anyone else, be it from the LGBTA community or not. I'm playing it for the amazing art, character designs, gameplay, and cute af dads. (Also for Ray Narvaez ❤) I thought I was playing it for the same reasons as everyone else. So I don't understand why the straight community is getting so much hate for supporting a game that's suppose to celebrate and represent your orientation. Can someone explain this insanity? It's stupid we can't ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ share.

[Sievers]

Originally posted by BlueOla:

What the eff? Why are you so concerned with what other people do? Maybe... mind your own business? You literally have no power over what other people do, how they do it, with what intention etc. You have NO power over other people. So why bother with them at all? Yeah, some people are gonna disrespect you - welcome to the real world. The entire fujoshi movement sprung from repressed female sexuality and the lack of any sort of media - pornographic or otherwise - that would cater to women and their preferences. The reason they call themselves "rotten" or "sinful" is because people KEEP TELLING THEM that what they're doing is WRONG. You're not "fixing" them by telling them to stop - you're fueling the thing that started it in the first place!

And I'm saying all of this as a lesbian. See, I know that there's a ♥♥♥♥ ton of straight dudes beating their meat to depictions of my sexuality every day. And what do I do about it? Nothing. Because it's none of my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ business. As long as they respect me in real life, I have no right to judge them - we all have our sexual preferences. If they disrespect me - they're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Too bad for them - they're the ones suffering the most from it, not me.

And I just wanted to say I love Sievers here - he's the voice of reason some people could really use nowadays.

Very well said, and thank you! I don't know if you read the other thread (it seems to have been deleted, which is disappointing because it was fascinating) but some people are being very militant about all of it. I admit I've gotten defensive over time, but all the hate on the other thread was pretty shocking to hear from this community.

My biggest argument is just this: is it really worth your time and effort? Does it affect your life so much that you feel truly lessened by it? Or is it at most a minor inconvenience, something that a few people out of thousands might occasionally annoy you with?

And on top of that, think about your own struggles in life, especially those that relate to being gay. You didn't choose those struggles, and for some they are more challenging to overcome than for others. I was lucky in that regard. But just because LGBT people have challenges doesn't mean the rest of the world doesn't. Other people also have sexual interests that they can't control. Keeping them respectfully to yourself (except with the appropriate audience) is a normal part of being a functioning member of society. Those who flaunt it are only causing themselves harm because they're the ones bringing all of their dirty laundry into the limelight. Those people likely deserve your contention, and I don't blame you for that. They may not understand that they're causing you harm, just like you likely don't notice that you're just flinging it right back at them.

These people are GENERALLY allies. Don't let the obnoxious actions of a few scream louder than the rest. You're in control of what you read and reply to on the internet, if you don't want to see it, then just don't see it. I'm not saying to take a blind eye to hate, but learn to prioritize and separate true hatred from just something you disagree with or find a lil icky.

EDIT: I'm going to add that the other thread was a lot more.... insensitive than this one has been. I've never been called "disgusting" by so many people before just for having a live-and-let-live attitude.

The word "disgusting" is one that should hit home pretty close for any gay person. Especially when concerning someone else's sexual interests. If you cannot see the hypocrisy there then... well then our cause is doomed to follow in the exact footsteps of the majority that we're fighting to be equally represented in.

[Duck.andcover]

Originally posted by GuyCable:

Originally posted by Sievers:

Fujoshis are not causing any harm

The fujoshi who followed my fiance and I around at the last anime convention we went to sexually harrassed and threatened to spank us with a paddle because we were "teh hawt yaois!!" So maybe your experience isn't the end-all be-all.

There's a very slight nuance in this topic but since a lot of people only allow themselves to engage in black and white thinking it manages to evade them. Nothing is wrong with having a private fantasy, if and only if you don't allow that fantasy to change the way you treat the type of people in the fantasy in a negative way. No going up to black guys and asking to see their massive black ♥♥♥♥♥. No privately messaging lesbians to tell them how hard seeing two chicks together makes you. No going up to gay couples and asking them to make out for your sexual gratification or else you'll sexually assault them.

The mindset that this type of behavour is acceptable because the targets are male and the perpetraitors are female is much more pervasive than it should be in the fujoshi community, and some guys are worried that the fanbase that may spring up from this game will perpetuate it.

This was just really me trying to explain the argument, but my opinion on the issue is thus: if you like to see two dudes going at it then cool, so do I. But don't treat me like a porn object. If you treat me with respect I really don't give a ♥♥♥♥ about anything else.

Thanks for saying something about it, I've personally seen and heard a lot of gross things from girls fetishizing mlm realtionships and guys fetishizing wlw realtionships. It's really annoying to see people say it isn't hurting or affecting anyone one cause it is.

[sntcringe]

Ok people, We have to let the straights into our community, or we're no better than they used to be to us. Especially as far as a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dating sim goes. If a straight woman wants to date hot daddies too, I say, the more the merrier, that means the developers (which clearly have been working their collective asses off) make some extra money, and more people get to enjoy the game. It's not like a straight woman playing is going to takeaway from your experience in any way, after all, it's single player.

To all the haters: Grow the ♥♥♥♥ up

To all the straight girls: Have fun, you go girl

[Olivia Rodriwoke]

I think its mainly just because a lot of fandoms have been tried with straight women claiming that gay relationships are "sinful" which doesn't do anything but hurt people. Thats it. You can play it and nobody SHOULD have a problem with it, but when that kinda stuff happens it becomes a problem.

Honestly? If you wanna play it, just play it.

[Slug Jones]

Hi, Straight dude here. I only heard about it from the outrage over a delay. I expected some bigger indie title that had the general population hyped. Like No Man's Sky type hype or something.

Well, it's a dad date sim. So, then I was wondering why a simple dating sim would have such a upset user base over a delay. Never struck me it could be because the LGBT community does not have too many games tailored to them first and not as an afterthought. I can kinda understand now. At any rate, I debated buying it to mess around with. I liked another anime dating sim (with girls) and enjoyed the mechanics, so while I am not attracted to men, I find the art cute, hope the mechanics are fun (trying to get with the guy you choose) and just enjoy playing something new. I don't think you will *have* to be sexually attracted to men to enjoy it.

I am happy to see gay men (and women) open to letting straight folk enjoy something that is catered to them. The gay community has been sadly mistreated by some straights for forever now.

[Fawn Witch]

Originally posted by Viktor:

OH! I found the best example about my position

If someone ask another person: What do you think about Gay couples? and the person answer: They are hot. THAT is a problem because that is when Gay people stop being threaded as person and more like objetcs of a fetish of some people. I think that is the best example I could do. They are people, a gay couple are as good as other couples and shouldn't be matter of fetish at first glance.

this is like a perfect example, for both sides. We all know a lot of m/m and f/f stuff made terribly sexualises gay people and includes a lot of topics in the relationship as if it's normal (examples of rape, abuse, and all that) and fans of that stuff will eat it up and demand more even though it's incredibly harmful to actual people

[BlueOla]

Originally posted by Shadowforce:

I think its mainly just because a lot of fandoms have been tried with straight women claiming that gay relationships are "sinful" which doesn't do anything but hurt people. Thats it. You can play it and nobody SHOULD have a problem with it, but when that kinda stuff happens it becomes a problem.

Honestly? If you wanna play it, just play it.

I'm preeeeetty sure they're referring to their enjoyment of the content being "sinful". I understand where the misunderstanding comes from, but in a society in which any sort of expression of sexuality from a woman or any enjoyment of something sexual is considered taboo, wrong and indeed sinful, it's not weird why this word was adopted. But it's not meant to be a stab at the LGBT community, it's literally just an expression of guilty pleasure aka "The society tells me I shouldn't enjoy these things because I'm a woman and women are supposed to be pure, but I do enjoy it, so I'm doing something wrong - I'm sinning".

This comes from someone who's been observing the fujoshi community for 5 years now so I know the ins and outs of everything at this point.

[꒰ა lia et al. ໒꒱]

tfw no daddy gf

[sleuth]

"straight community" lol

[DankSlayer]

The hate might also come that there are some controversies revealed about the game and the dev team.

[Portergauge]

Shame that some of the arguments boil down to "you're at fault for being too sensitive, you need to accept that people want to fetishize you."

[Karmigula]

Originally posted by kieranchiddix:

Shame that some of the arguments boil down to "you're at fault for being too sensitive, you need to accept that people want to fetishize you."

No one ever considers that people are fetishizing the idea, not the people. Probably because most people are more interested in others physically as opposed to being interested in the situations they could be in with others psychologically.

[Vangato]

So like this whole "fujioshi hate" thing realy bugs me. I identify as an asexual, I literally am not attrached to people. Sexual orintation is discribed as a sliding scale, however. As such I happen to be able to have "alone time" only if I focus on a fetish I enjoy. Its not the charaters I am attrachted to, and the thought of me participating in such acts is an instant mood killer. Being called names and insulted whenever I explain this to people is hurtful, and as such, I isolate myself from compaionship. Fetishes are not meant to be hurtful toward one party, they are fun for people and needed for some. You cannot control the confines of anothers mind and the constant attcking of others is wrong. As long as your fetish doesn't bleed into everyday (ie: harming another person) I think go for it. Dream about whatever gets you off. Just seprate the fantasy from reality.

[Dead Them]

Why all this talk of communities, genders, orientation, race etc etc?
This is a game that caters to a select group of people. Date sim gamers who have no hate or bias towards anything but good story and gameplay (and maybe puns)
Im a straight white 20something male, I am the exact definition of everyone in the worlds EVIL. My crime, being born and wanting to play this game when i get some change from my slightly older evil overlord white males who control the world.....

In all seriousness, I don't want to hurt or insult anyone but having this petty fight over a project by some funny idiot friends getting together to fill the niche audience.....It's ridiculous :)

[Portergauge]

Originally posted by SoulMystique:

Originally posted by kieranchiddix:

Shame that some of the arguments boil down to "you're at fault for being too sensitive, you need to accept that people want to fetishize you."

No one ever considers that people are fetishizing the idea, not the people. Probably because most people are more interested in others physically as opposed to being interested in the situations they could be in with others psychologically.

That's.... worse. Not even caring about actual gay people, just the idea of it?