[Spoiler] My real life Chloe Price.

[IAmTheDoctor]

So my play through of Life is Strange stirred up some very old memories and emotions and after several weeks of being stuck in a rut, reading forums, and watching YouTube videos I decided to make this post to get it all out in the open. If you decide to read onward then fair warning, there’s a lot of emotional baggage below.

I’ve read a ton of posts from people saying they wish they had a Chloe in their life or that Chloe Price is their ideal girl and I wanted to share what it was like growing up with someone who’s life story was eerily similar to the game’s wild bluenette. My Chloe was named Meagan, she was 6 months older than me and our mothers were best friends growing up. We were best friends from a time before I was old enough to have memories. She was smart, kind, and one of the most artistic people I’ve ever known, even today. I remember being a little jealous as a kid about how much attention her artwork got in our art classes in school (I have no artistic talent but I also didn't like not being praised as a kid). She was my “date” to our eighth-grade dance when I couldn’t get a date/lacked the courage to really ask any girls other than her. Our parents were secretly thrilled because my mother would later tell me that they’d hoped the two of us would end up together. If I’m being honest, I was starting to crush on her too but I never said it out loud until I was seeing a therapist years later. The summer before freshman year of high school changed everything. Both of her parents died unexpectedly in a car accident. It was both of our first experiences with the death of a loved one. She moved in with her grandparents who lived on the other side of town which made it harder to hang out. That didn’t stop me from trying. Like Chloe, Meagan was angry. She never really got passed that phase of the grieving process but I wanted to be there for her. In a totally selfish way I had this dream of being the guy who brought her back around but I couldn’t keep up. She would be depressed, then manic; angrily lash out, then freak out about being scared of losing me or anyone else. She started dressing differently, skipping school, getting into drugs, alcohol, and other risk-taking behaviors. She was constantly in detention and had multiple suspensions. I was an honors student and wanted to be a doctor. We grew apart and lost touch. I remember it was midway through senior year when she went missing entirely. Part of me expected there to be a big mystery and city-wide search for her but part of me thought she was dead or had finally just skipped town. There was no big search. It took about a day and a half to find her body. She'd died of an overdose. I still can’t decide if it was intentional or accidental personally.
Even though we hadn’t really talked beyond occasional nods and happy birthday texts I grieved pretty hard. I went through a phase where I felt like I’d failed her, like it was my fault, if I’d been there for her more, if I’d tried harder, etc things might have been different. As an adult I realize that’s not true but the idea still haunted me for a long time. Eventually I saw a therapist. I went to college, medical school, became a pediatrician. I married a wonderful woman. “Difficult” teenagers are still some of my favorite patients to see in the office, probably because of her.

Meagan’s death affected me in ways I’ll never be able to put to words. For reasons that should be obvious to anyone who read the above story this game hit close to home. When I got to the bae vs bay choice I couldn’t pick bae fast enough. All I could think about was Meagan and how I wished I could’ve reached her and I wasn’t going to let Chloe die angry, alone, and without her best friend.

Reading the forums and seeing people long for a Chloe in their lives makes me sad all over again. Chloe’s are hard. Chloe’s are gut wrenching, infuriating, and impossible. They are broken and it’s not their fault, but you can’t fix them if they don’t want your help. Depression sucks and I long for a world where there are no Chloe’s. If you're going through something, please reach out to someone.

[Gengie22]

Hey hope your doing ok ty for sharing I know it must be hard, I post this often to help people get over the game https://www.reddit.com/r/lifeisstrange/comments/5xlm4y/postlis_survival_list/ hope it can help someone here

[sashanaber]

I think that most children who have lost their father and then their only friend at 13 will become “difficult”.
But Chloe is strong, not cruel, not selfish, she is ready to sacrifice herself for the sake of others. In the 4th episode, she asked to kill herself, because she did not want her parents to work 24/7. In episode 5, she learned the truth about Rachel and regained her childhood friend, she could have chosen life, but ... voluntarily agreed to die in order to save the city.

[IAmTheDoctor]

Originally posted by sashanaber:

I think that most children who have lost their father and then their only friend at 13 will become “difficult”.
But Chloe is strong, not cruel, not selfish, she is ready to sacrifice herself for the sake of others. In the 4th episode, she asked to kill herself, because she did not want her parents to work 24/7. In episode 5, she learned the truth about Rachel and regained her childhood friend, she could have chosen life, but ... voluntarily agreed to die in order to save the city.

I'm sorry if my message was misconstrued but I never once said that people like Chloe are selfish or cruel. I never said Chloe didn't have a good heart or that she wasn't a compassionate person. Quite the opposite in fact. I believe people like her hurt in ways that are too difficult to truly ever comprehend BECAUSE they care so much. It's that pain that ends up hurting others around them.

Despite their outwards appearances and attitudes people like Chloe and my friend Meagan aren't devil-may-care badasses and having them in your life isn't full of whimsical adventures. It's full of sorrow and hurt and failed attempts to reach them. I wish no one would ever have to go through the amount of suffering they likely went through.

[sashanaber]

Originally posted by IAmTheDoctor:

I believe people like her hurt in ways that are too difficult to truly ever comprehend BECAUSE they care so much. It's that pain that ends up hurting others around them.

Despite their outwards appearances and attitudes people like Chloe and my friend Meagan aren't devil-may-care badasses and having them in your life isn't full of whimsical adventures. It's full of sorrow and hurt and failed attempts to reach them. I wish no one would ever have to go through the amount of suffering they likely went through.

Well, may be, may be... Thanks for the explanation.

[SpicyPepperoni]

tldr: ABida ack abida ack

[Lar Dass]

sweet jesus