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Already rent a server for Ark a few years ago and recently (even though I stopped hosting again, since of still being under development).
So I am not totally unexpierenced about. But I still cannot help you with your issue, as different games, different issues.
However, when V1.0 arrives I may give a dedicated server with Forest a try.
There are also some interesting points for dedicated servers in the developer plans for V1.0:
https://theforest.gamepedia.com/V1.0#Developers_Plans_for_Release
It may be possible that everything has to be rebuilt, when the full release is out.
Since savegames may get incompatible with previous builts.
Was stated that the full release is this year at the end of April.
The developers just have listened to the community and implemented multiplayer quickly.
Something what didn't happen for Subnautica for example. Even though Subnautica is also very awesome it could have been way more fun if you were able to play with someone else to minimize the resource grind.