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Have you tried mixing parts from Vengarl and Velstadt sets to see if you like a mix? Maybe your inner Fasion Souls lover would prefer a combo of the two.
The ultimate defense is being able to Roll and Parry incoming attacks. If you are skilled at these, you don't need the defense stats from armor, so your armor choices will either be based off of looks, or off of what is more useful in some other way... Maybe even a combo of the two.
If by circlejerk you meant stuff like...
...that, then that is an end result of someone realizing that the best defense if Roll and Parry, and thus giving advice based off that, but not mentioning why.
To add to ShinkuTear's excellent post, attack evasion is definitely the most important 'stat' for PvP and PvE. Next is weight. Combine what you like, look how you like, play how you like.
I don't like to mix due to a bit of OCD bugging me more then the look of any set, though some are ugly.
I was planning on the Steel Set, then realized the Vengarl's I had on was better in stats then I realized. But Vengarl's was right next to Velstadt's on the wiki, and I clicked out of curiosity, and then I couldn't decide.
Sorry for the TL;DR, I think ill go with Vengarl's, just becuase it looks better and the stats are good.